loser

Dude, I fucking hate "loser" posers. And I know this sounds so pathetic, like it’s some kind of competition, but hear me out.

I’m the type of person who’s into anime, weeb shit, always got my headphones on, wearing black—your stereotypical “loser” type. And I have some friends at uni who like the same stuff as me, right? And this is never outright said or anything, but they also consider themselves losers.

But that’s the problem. They’re not losers.

They’re always going out, have a ton of friends, constantly on their phones, part of clubs like dance and shit. And like, I wouldn’t wanna change them or anything—we’re friends for a reason, you know?

I just wish I had some actual “loser” friends. I like being alone, I really do, but I wish I had someone who could just be a loser with me. Someone to chill, read manga/manhwa, watch anime, and enjoy dumb shit with. But I guess that’s the thing about real losers—you can’t just find them. They’re so secluded, so in their own world, that they’re basically impossible to befriend unless you somehow stumble into each other’s orbit.

Once in high school, I had a friend like that. Honestly, I think she was my soulmate. We just matched—same weird energy, same loser tendencies. She was so cool in the uncoolest way. But she didn’t end up going to university, and we just kinda drifted. I guess that’s life, but damn, I miss her.

Maybe this is all just a huge projection because I miss my soulmate.