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Genuine questions for the wlw people/lesbians!!!
Did you lose female friends or your female friends started becoming distant when you came out to them?? Were they as comfortable with you as before? Is it normal to feel guilty that I'm somehow taking advantage of my female friends when they act physical (hug, touch or are comfortable in changing clothes in front of me) despite not having any sort of sexual thoughts about them? Or is this some form of internalized homophobia?
I started university recently and got a new group of friends. My friends in high school were people I knew since we were babies so when I came out to them both guys and girls didn't treat me any differently. Also I was never one for skin ship so that was never an issue. But now in uni most of the girls are super straight, like pretending to kiss a ...... reply
Not gonna lie I’ve never had to come out to any of my friends. They all assumed I was queer on some level. One even said I “Looked visibly gay” which I mean… fair I guess??? And I’m the type to absolutely CLING to my friends. Back in high school my theater teacher coined the term “Friends aren’t furniture” because I kept sitting on ...... reply
I had people who treated me differently. I was part of my high school's volleyball team and we all got changed in the same room. Some of them started acting weird while they were changing while some others didn't even care. Mind you one of the people who didn't care was another bisexual girl so I think that explains a lot. Seeing how comfortable sh...... reply
All my friends are fruits. So no this has not happened. Then again my friends and I see each other as siblings since we've known each other for years. None of us bats an eye to physical intimacy nor changing clothes.
If anything I only feel sort of awkward with coworkers and people I don't know that well. reply
friends from childhood knew and were cool with it, we weren't super physical touch/nudity heavy though;;; there was only like one time a friend in HS rejected a v-day gift from me (i gave v-day gifts to like 6 friends). but i still worried it affected how ppl saw me so i went back into the closet come uni. reply
My friend and I were pretty tight back then and yeah we were very touchy touchy and kissed each other on the cheeks as well. When I came out to her and I had a hardcore crush on a girl at that time, she was extremely supportive and pushed me to confess to her! I am really grateful to her for being such an angel. I never felt like I was taking advan...... reply
So, why are you feeling guilty about being physical with your female friends? Is it awkward for you being in those situations? Did you talk about it with your female friends? Did you have the same feelings before coming out?
Maybe you are projecting your uneasy feelings onto them?
I would advice to observe and reflect your feelings. Also ask some ...... reply
I came out to a friend once, since I knew it was safe around them to just say come out and they were really understanding and I feel like we both got closer after I came out to, so it really depends on the people you befriended/ hang out with. And for physical stuff I don't really like ppl touching me so I make that clear, and the last one I guess ...... reply
Never had to come out lmao, my friends knew from the start. Oddly enough, they get closer to me(?). I remember one of my female friends being real touchy (she'd hold my hand, etc etc). reply
