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Any Bisaya readers here? Need advice.
Me (24F) and my boyfriend (26M) have been together for 4 years, and our relationship is open with our families. I have some thoughts and need advice, but I can't share them with my friends because they’re personal and private, so I’m here anonymously. He’s my first boyfriend and my first in everything, and I’m a very conservative person when it comes to sexual activities. I’ve given him intimacy when he asks, but tonight, when I rejected him after he was drinking with his friends, he casually said, “Pa isa babe,” and I felt a little disrespected, especially since he said it with this emoji.
I told him, “Sorry if you’re upset, but I don’t like the way you said it.” He replied, “Okay ra.” I questioned his response because it didn’t seem sincere, so I asked, “So, are you upset?” He replied, “Depende na sa imo,” which I didn’t understand. Maybe I’m overthinking it, so I replied, “Ikaw man akong gipangutana?” to clarify if he got my point. His reply was, “Bahala ka diha.” I didn’t expect him to get angry over a simple question, but maybe it was because he was drunk. After that, I said, “Nasuko naman nuon ka,” and he responded with, “Kung unsay desisyon nimo, mao nana, ug ako na bahala sa akong sarili.”
Now I have so many questions: Is it wrong to reject him because of the way he asked casually, or am I overreacting to the way he said it?
Girl You’re not overreacting you felt disrespected in that moment, and it’s okay to expect gentleness, especially from someone who knows you, your values, and how much trust you’ve placed in them. You weren’t just saying no to ykyk but you were reacting to how he asked, which made you feel more like an object than an actual person. Thats in...... reply
