personally I don’t want to normalize this kind of story, but I often hear that this stories can be a source of comfort for the people who have gone through the same thing. but i still can’t wrap my head around this. is that really true? and how is that possible? isn’t the story where the mc ended up with their rapist actually makes the victims believe it’s okay to be raped and they don’t need help? how is it possible a story that romanticizes rape actually makes you feel safe?
Yesterday, while i was answering a question, i emphasized this aspect a bit. idrk where you read that kind of nonsense, but let me tell you: it’s not true. At least in BL/yaoi, stories that include depictions of SA are almost never crafted in a way that allows a victim to find solace or feel understood, accepted, or safe. That claim is a fucking massive lie, especially when applied to BL. Authors who write and portray these kinds of "dynamics" or rather: actual crimes, trauma, and suffering, rarely take into acc what rape truly entails. They fail to show the real consequences. they don't reflect the physical and psychological impact it leaves behind, nor the fact that many victims carry that trauma for the rest of their lives. Because we all fucking know that rape isn't just a fleeting experience, it is a trauma that can stay with you forever. Like i mentioned yesterd rape in yaoi is often used merely as a tool for entertainment. It is presented as if it were a normal, desirable, arousing, sexy, or easily digestible sexual encounter. That isn't representation. That is commodifying real suffering and turning it into a consumer product. I do NOT believe a victim would find solace in a story where their suffering is normalized, romanticized, and sexualized.
Also, the whole "the victim ends up with their abuser" trope. yes, situations like that can happen in real life. But that's a psychological response to abuse, not a healthy romance. that fuckass ''trope'' is based on a real phenomenon, commonly known as trauma bonding. Cases like this are handled by experts. they aren't just left as is for the sake of it, because the impact on the victims can be severe. As we know, yaoi doesn't represent reality at all, and this is no exception. "B-but it's fiction there's no need to depict real life stuff jeeeez" dawg, please just stfu. This is my biggest fucking issue with that ass ''argument''. Just because it's "fiction" doesn't mean it can't (or shouldn't) clearly depict real things. Calling something "fiction" doesn't exempt it from clearly representing real world issues. You have to separate the story from the subject matter. You have to make a DISTINCTION. the fictional part is the story itself, not the elements used to tell it. The fiction is the yaoi/BL you create: the characters, the names, the plot and allat . But the damn rape isn't. Rape is a real act of violence that exists in the real world. You can't reduce it to "just fiction" simply because it appears in a fictional story, it can't just be reduced to a mere fictional device, that's not how it works. When fiction portrays the abuser/victim dynamic so wrongly showing the abuse and the resulting trauma being forgotten out of nowhere, with everything suddenly changing and them falling in ''love'' (even though WE know that this type of abusive dynamics and trauma responses are complex and often require professional intervention) it ignores the fact that this is a serious issue with real consequences, and the authors are fundamentally misrepresenting a real issue. I'm not even gonna touch on the consequences bc that's a whole other discussion, and ts is getting too long and PROBABLY yall are not reading allat . But wtv, i'll say it again:
I don't think anyone who has actually lived through that kind of experience would find comfort with a story as stupid and shittily put together as yaoi with that kind of shitty "trope. i don't think they'd feel comfortable watching their own trauma get dismissed and romanticized and commercialized as smth ''good''
I think it just goes to show people react, use and engage with fiction differently. It's not a one size fits all when it comes to fictional stories and people.
It's a coping mechanism, it's just a really unhealthy one and that is from personal experience (⊙…⊙ )(⊙…⊙ )(⊙…⊙ ). I don't really know how to explain it, but sometimes if you read a lot of it, it becomes distant and you sort of make some sort of fantasy dream of it where the people aren't really people and you're just in some sort of story. And at some point you sort of just don't think of that as being yourself anymore. Especially the ones that heavily romanticize it... uhh ╮(￣▽￣)╭.
Also, personally and of the people I know of (some not sa victims but just general abuse), a lot of the lack of control in rapehwa is comforting. If that even makes sense. Even if you are victim of a poor environment, the very romanticized rapehwa where the top takes control from the bottom but treats them fairly well is pretty... it's not necessarily a bad feeling. Nor do I think people get off of the rape itself. It's not like sexually arousing, it's just kind of giggly uhh ╮(￣▽￣)╭ ╮(￣▽￣)╭ ╮(￣▽￣)╭?
Though it's unhealthy and I try to distance myself from it now (⊙…⊙ )(⊙…⊙ )(⊙…⊙ ).
I find this argument only applicable in case where the SA/Rape are explored thoroughly and represented by someone who truly understands the subject. Personally, I think that people who read those mainstream BLs that contain rape/SA and say it can be relatable to the victims are delusional.
Don't get me wrong, I understand the situation, I know that there are in fact, though less than anyone tries to exaggerate, victims who DO maybe get attracted to said stories, but just because it's *A* "solution" doesn't mean it's a valid one. Hypersexuality is common for victims, and I empathize with that, but you should be looking into therapy or psychology sessions in the case it, if you don't have the money, many communities on different platforms opens their arms to victims and lets them share their stories, talk about it, and find a solution for it with others of the same pain.
Frankly, while those people exist, it's an extremely small minority group in a bigger community that is just trying to excuse the high they feel when seeing someone getting used. I believe that no victim of rape or SA would enjoy seeing someone go through the same experience, nobody enjoys getting assaulted or raped, and for anyone who says they have a kink for that: no you don't, you have a cnc kink which still counts as consensual sex. If youre not a victim and you still enjoy these stories, I implore you to read on paraphilia, or, better yet, tell somebody around you that can help you. You'll only get worse if you normalize this shit in your brain.
But I'd like to add, when you see these stories, even though they're an escape to some victims, is it worth the amount of damage they create to society?
I find the existence of those stories a great step back to an already broken society. The fact that they're so easily accessible for people, so popularized and brought to attention, is in itself the problem, because in reality, these books
But I'd like to add, when you see these stories, even though they're an escape to some victims, is it worth the amount of damage they create to society? I find the existence of those stories a great step back t... LA0R0O
Are going to exist no matter what people say, it's not the fault of mangago or any piracy site that they have them, those sites have ANYTHING, and moderation can only do so much in the face of users who upload such suff. The problem is obviously the writers who are after money and fame, but people whom in return give those writers their money and popularize them is for me are at fault more than the writers, if those writers were shamed from the start, called out for the tropes they indulge, there wouldn't be as many stories as today offers.
nahhh the trope abused x abuser should be nuked to its root. unless the plot actually focuses on the victim's mentality, how they process the assault, and how they heal from it. now that's when i believe ppl get comforted from it
Yes, multiple psychological frameworks, most notably Narrative Identity Theory and Narrative Therapy—demonstrate that stories fundamentally help us understand ourselves, process emotions, and build resilience. By giving shape to our experiences, stories allow our brains to categorize emotions, reframe challenges, and take ownership of our lives.
That's why stories need to be written sincerely, themes should be done justice to, nuances and insights should be prioritised even if story follows tropes. So most stories in the genre don't qualify. But don't listen to generalised statements on this comment section that stories don't help, they are misguided and ignorant.
Personally thats an oversimplification. Not all survivors like those stories and its valid for them to feel that way but for some people it can create a way for them to process their feelings through fiction, is it the healthiest? absolutely not, but some people dont have the financial means or even community to support them so they turn to fiction as a form of escapism. I was one of those people before who looked for emotional validation through stories that depicted my situation but I have healed from that and I no longer search for stories like that.
I think some SA stories can help victims of abuse. But the thing is with how you word it, no. Not every SA story is a ‘romance’ story where the main character falls in love with their rapist/abuser and it’s a lot more broad of a topic because SA can be talked about in books in many ways outside of ‘dark romance’. SA isn’t a genre or a similar experience for everyone that warrants the same reaction.
Some people in real life may gain ‘attraction’ to consent-no-consent roleplay in order to cope but stories about that taking place isn’t necessarily for their comfort and the likelihood of the author just finding that sexual attractive is possible. (<- When talking about ‘romance’ stories) But some represent that attraction for awareness and comfort, to show people they aren’t alone while not sexualizing the act. Again, it depends mostly on the authors writing place as SA shouldn’t be and how I see it, isn’t a genre.
There's cnc kink which is normal but personally the difference is cnc is CONSENSUAL i don't see why stories can't just be about that instead of full on rape
not in the slightest. in fact, I hate stuff where they end up with their assaulter cause that's all bs. I did get hypersexual but hell nah that's all bs
Wth idk why it got sent mid sentence. So as i was saying it depends but from what you were talking about thats a BIG NO. Kim dokjas Th0ng
Omg why does it keep sending mid freaking sentence.. again i will say No, why the fuck would u go out with the person who assaulted you with no consent, plus you were obviously uncomfortable. But hey if you like them or wtv, you do you. As i was saying if so let me try a hypothesist, a victim getting influenced by this type of story so they ended up dating their rapist possibly out of shame, or that they would think its better that way, "because they already did it" they would just end up depressed and mentally unstable, from every touch that person made, that would make them remember what they did. But they would jst suffer it thinking one day maybe, both of them could be happy and fall inlove, just like in the story.
Wth idk why it got sent mid sentence. So as i was saying it depends but from what you were talking about thats a BIG NO. Kim dokjas Th0ng
Omg why does it keep sending mid freaking sentence.. again i will say No, why the fuck would u go out with the person who assaulted you with no consent, plus you were obviously uncomfortable. But hey if you like them or wtv, you do you. As i was saying if so let me try a hypothesist, a victim getting influenced by this type of story so they ended up dating their rapist possibly out of shame, or that they would think its better that way, "because they already did it" they would just end up depressed and mentally unstable, from every touch that person made, that would make them remember what they did. But they would jst suffer it thinking one day maybe, both of them could be happy and fall inlove, just like in the story.
Omg why does it keep sending mid freaking sentence.. again i will say No, why the fuck would u go out with the person who assaulted you with no consent, plus you were obviously uncomfortable. But hey if you lik... Kim dokjas Th0ng
Omg my mangago is so broken... dont mind the same text guys *puppy eyes*
Messages
Yesterday, while i was answering a question, i emphasized this aspect a bit. idrk where you read that kind of nonsense, but let me tell you: it’s not true. At least in BL/yaoi, stories that include depictions of SA are almost never crafted in a way that allows a victim to find solace or feel understood, accepted, or safe. That claim is a fucking massive lie, especially when applied to BL. Authors who write and portray these kinds of "dynamics" or rather: actual crimes, trauma, and suffering, rarely take into acc what rape truly entails. They fail to show the real consequences. they don't reflect the physical and psychological impact it leaves behind, nor the fact that many victims carry that trauma for the rest of their lives. Because we all fucking know that rape isn't just a fleeting experience, it is a trauma that can stay with you forever. Like i mentioned yesterd rape in yaoi is often used merely as a tool for entertainment. It is presented as if it were a normal, desirable, arousing, sexy, or easily digestible sexual encounter. That isn't representation. That is commodifying real suffering and turning it into a consumer product. I do NOT believe a victim would find solace in a story where their suffering is normalized, romanticized, and sexualized.
Also, the whole "the victim ends up with their abuser" trope. yes, situations like that can happen in real life. But that's a psychological response to abuse, not a healthy romance. that fuckass ''trope'' is based on a real phenomenon, commonly known as trauma bonding. Cases like this are handled by experts. they aren't just left as is for the sake of it, because the impact on the victims can be severe. As we know, yaoi doesn't represent reality at all, and this is no exception. "B-but it's fiction there's no need to depict real life stuff jeeeez" dawg, please just stfu. This is my biggest fucking issue with that ass ''argument''. Just because it's "fiction" doesn't mean it can't (or shouldn't) clearly depict real things. Calling something "fiction" doesn't exempt it from clearly representing real world issues. You have to separate the story from the subject matter. You have to make a DISTINCTION. the fictional part is the story itself, not the elements used to tell it. The fiction is the yaoi/BL you create: the characters, the names, the plot and allat . But the damn rape isn't. Rape is a real act of violence that exists in the real world. You can't reduce it to "just fiction" simply because it appears in a fictional story, it can't just be reduced to a mere fictional device, that's not how it works. When fiction portrays the abuser/victim dynamic so wrongly showing the abuse and the resulting trauma being forgotten out of nowhere, with everything suddenly changing and them falling in ''love'' (even though WE know that this type of abusive dynamics and trauma responses are complex and often require professional intervention) it ignores the fact that this is a serious issue with real consequences, and the authors are fundamentally misrepresenting a real issue. I'm not even gonna touch on the consequences bc that's a whole other discussion, and ts is getting too long and PROBABLY yall are not reading allat . But wtv, i'll say it again:
I don't think anyone who has actually lived through that kind of experience would find comfort with a story as stupid and shittily put together as yaoi with that kind of shitty "trope. i don't think they'd feel comfortable watching their own trauma get dismissed and romanticized and commercialized as smth ''good''
I also have another perspective focused on hypersexuality in victims of SA, but wtv
I think it just goes to show people react, use and engage with fiction differently. It's not a one size fits all when it comes to fictional stories and people.
It's a coping mechanism, it's just a really unhealthy one and that is from personal experience (⊙…⊙ )(⊙…⊙ )(⊙…⊙ ). I don't really know how to explain it, but sometimes if you read a lot of it, it becomes distant and you sort of make some sort of fantasy dream of it where the people aren't really people and you're just in some sort of story. And at some point you sort of just don't think of that as being yourself anymore. Especially the ones that heavily romanticize it... uhh ╮(￣▽￣)╭.
Also, personally and of the people I know of (some not sa victims but just general abuse), a lot of the lack of control in rapehwa is comforting. If that even makes sense. Even if you are victim of a poor environment, the very romanticized rapehwa where the top takes control from the bottom but treats them fairly well is pretty... it's not necessarily a bad feeling. Nor do I think people get off of the rape itself. It's not like sexually arousing, it's just kind of giggly uhh ╮(￣▽￣)╭ ╮(￣▽￣)╭ ╮(￣▽￣)╭?
Though it's unhealthy and I try to distance myself from it now (⊙…⊙ )(⊙…⊙ )(⊙…⊙ ).
ok i have learned from replies once again to not read it lolololol
I find this argument only applicable in case where the SA/Rape are explored thoroughly and represented by someone who truly understands the subject. Personally, I think that people who read those mainstream BLs that contain rape/SA and say it can be relatable to the victims are delusional.
Don't get me wrong, I understand the situation, I know that there are in fact, though less than anyone tries to exaggerate, victims who DO maybe get attracted to said stories, but just because it's *A* "solution" doesn't mean it's a valid one. Hypersexuality is common for victims, and I empathize with that, but you should be looking into therapy or psychology sessions in the case it, if you don't have the money, many communities on different platforms opens their arms to victims and lets them share their stories, talk about it, and find a solution for it with others of the same pain.
Frankly, while those people exist, it's an extremely small minority group in a bigger community that is just trying to excuse the high they feel when seeing someone getting used. I believe that no victim of rape or SA would enjoy seeing someone go through the same experience, nobody enjoys getting assaulted or raped, and for anyone who says they have a kink for that: no you don't, you have a cnc kink which still counts as consensual sex. If youre not a victim and you still enjoy these stories, I implore you to read on paraphilia, or, better yet, tell somebody around you that can help you. You'll only get worse if you normalize this shit in your brain.
But I'd like to add, when you see these stories, even though they're an escape to some victims, is it worth the amount of damage they create to society?
I find the existence of those stories a great step back to an already broken society. The fact that they're so easily accessible for people, so popularized and brought to attention, is in itself the problem, because in reality, these books
Are going to exist no matter what people say, it's not the fault of mangago or any piracy site that they have them, those sites have ANYTHING, and moderation can only do so much in the face of users who upload such suff. The problem is obviously the writers who are after money and fame, but people whom in return give those writers their money and popularize them is for me are at fault more than the writers, if those writers were shamed from the start, called out for the tropes they indulge, there wouldn't be as many stories as today offers.
nahhh the trope abused x abuser should be nuked to its root. unless the plot actually focuses on the victim's mentality, how they process the assault, and how they heal from it. now that's when i believe ppl get comforted from it
Yes, multiple psychological frameworks, most notably Narrative Identity Theory and Narrative Therapy—demonstrate that stories fundamentally help us understand ourselves, process emotions, and build resilience. By giving shape to our experiences, stories allow our brains to categorize emotions, reframe challenges, and take ownership of our lives.
That's why stories need to be written sincerely, themes should be done justice to, nuances and insights should be prioritised even if story follows tropes. So most stories in the genre don't qualify. But don't listen to generalised statements on this comment section that stories don't help, they are misguided and ignorant.
Personally thats an oversimplification. Not all survivors like those stories and its valid for them to feel that way but for some people it can create a way for them to process their feelings through fiction, is it the healthiest? absolutely not, but some people dont have the financial means or even community to support them so they turn to fiction as a form of escapism. I was one of those people before who looked for emotional validation through stories that depicted my situation but I have healed from that and I no longer search for stories like that.
I think some SA stories can help victims of abuse. But the thing is with how you word it, no. Not every SA story is a ‘romance’ story where the main character falls in love with their rapist/abuser and it’s a lot more broad of a topic because SA can be talked about in books in many ways outside of ‘dark romance’. SA isn’t a genre or a similar experience for everyone that warrants the same reaction.
Some people in real life may gain ‘attraction’ to consent-no-consent roleplay in order to cope but stories about that taking place isn’t necessarily for their comfort and the likelihood of the author just finding that sexual attractive is possible. (<- When talking about ‘romance’ stories) But some represent that attraction for awareness and comfort, to show people they aren’t alone while not sexualizing the act. Again, it depends mostly on the authors writing place as SA shouldn’t be and how I see it, isn’t a genre.
There's cnc kink which is normal but personally the difference is cnc is CONSENSUAL i don't see why stories can't just be about that instead of full on rape
not in the slightest. in fact, I hate stuff where they end up with their assaulter cause that's all bs. I did get hypersexual but hell nah that's all bs
Honest it depends on the stories plot
Wth idk why it got sent mid sentence. So as i was saying it depends but from what you were talking about thats a BIG NO.
Omg why does it keep sending mid freaking sentence.. again i will say No, why the fuck would u go out with the person who assaulted you with no consent, plus you were obviously uncomfortable. But hey if you like them or wtv, you do you. As i was saying if so let me try a hypothesist, a victim getting influenced by this type of story so they ended up dating their rapist possibly out of shame, or that they would think its better that way, "because they already did it" they would just end up depressed and mentally unstable, from every touch that person made, that would make them remember what they did. But they would jst suffer it thinking one day maybe, both of them could be happy and fall inlove, just like in the story.
Omg why does it keep sending mid freaking sentence.. again i will say No, why the fuck would u go out with the person who assaulted you with no consent, plus you were obviously uncomfortable. But hey if you like them or wtv, you do you. As i was saying if so let me try a hypothesist, a victim getting influenced by this type of story so they ended up dating their rapist possibly out of shame, or that they would think its better that way, "because they already did it" they would just end up depressed and mentally unstable, from every touch that person made, that would make them remember what they did. But they would jst suffer it thinking one day maybe, both of them could be happy and fall inlove, just like in the story.
Omg my mangago is so broken... dont mind the same text guys *puppy eyes*