Sorry, guys! During system maintenance, some functions like comment are unavailable.
I want your opinion
So, I have a best friend. We’ve been super close for 20 years, basically grew up together. But ever since she got a boyfriend a couple of months ago, things have been completely different between us. We used to send long, enthusiastic texts and talk about literally everything—and she was always the one to text first. Now? I’m always the one reaching out, trying to keep the conversation going, and her replies are just dry. Even when we hang out, she’s literally on the phone with him 24/7, and I’m just sitting there feeling completely left out. To make things worse, I heard some sketchy stuff about her boyfriend from his former coworkers—not even from her. Turns out he’s divorced with a kid, and one coworker literally told me he only liked my friend because she looks like his ex-wife... I was honestly speechless. On top of that, my mom recently told me that my friend is thinking about marrying him. She literally just turned 20. I know it’s her life and her choice, but I’m genuinely worried. He doesn't have a job, barely puts any effort into taking her out, and she’s not working either—she still relies on her parents. I really want to talk to her about this, but I’m terrified it’ll ruin our friendship, especially since she’s my only friend. Am I overstepping here?
If she was older I wouldn't raise the flag, but context that she is 20 and her bf is (from my reading), implied to be an older man (40's) is heavily concerning. From how you described their relationship, I get a whiff of an unhealthy relationship at best and abusive at worst. . . You can have a talk with her, but in situations like these it may be ...... reply
I saw it numerous times. She will get pregnant and he will mentally abuse her and eventually leave her he will do nothing but ruin her life. Thats what men with no jobs do when they are decades oder dating a barely legal girl. reply
saving her from a nasty man is not overstepping. girl is 20 with a divorced man. something is wrong with him if he can't (or won't) date in his age pool. you obviously have to use much nicer language than i am, but save your friend.
and wait he has a child but no job? how is he supporting his own child? i sense a little male-centred selfishness i...... reply
i dont think its overstepping, js make sure she's totally okay and even if she tries to push you away (or he makes her push you away) js make sure youre there for her every step of the way. I feel like its a common manipulation technique to have the partner push their friends away. reply
It's only overstepping if you force or make decisions for her. You can have an honest talk with her about it. Come from a place of worry, and come as a friend. Talk about you-- why you feel or think the way you do (and make sure you're actually coming from a place of care, not from a place of fixing, judgement or parenting) and ask about what she t...... reply
Yes. You're over stepping. You want to protect your friend but if you butt in all she will do is turn on you, end your friendship, and dig her heels into that relationship. Unfortunately, this is a mistake she will just have to make. 1 reply
these types of people will always ignore the flaws of their partner and if they disrespect you in the process then they’re probably not worth your energy reply
Stay out of her love life. She will find out truths on her own....seriously be there for your friend when the shit hits the fan and it will probably. You trash him and she marries and say they do great, you dog shit.....you trash him and they break up and get back together, you dog shit.....so leave it alone is what I would do. A lot of ways for...... reply
