i am by no means a professional at BDSM and stuff like that but for consent im pretty sure you have to have a safe word? for when like things get too intense, you say the safe word, examples could be like tomatoes or carnations, and your partner has to stop
Yes consent is very important because without it they are basically rape and people who do bdsm, some are consensual and some are not (idk if it happens in real life but in yaoi, yes) and for the punishment, it is a discipline that dom/sadist does when their partner broke or didn't follow the rules
i think its because you gave consent beforehand by talking about what eachother likes,,, so whenever it does happen ig it doesnt count as rape or smn. and thats why they have safe words so if theyre not in the mood or if they went too far theyll stop,,, i think.
read my ted talk (BDSM 101) lol:
http://www.mangago.me/home/mangatopic/10462949/
bdsm is always about consent and one of the most consensual forms of sex. What you see portrayed in BL isn't really an accurate representation of it, similarly to how 50 shades of gray poorly captures it. There are a few like BJ Alex however that I feel like would be more accurate.
Thank you so much to everyone for sharing your thoughts. It really give me a big leap on my research.
If you want an SSC BDSM that is very close to realistic, read
http://www.mangago.me/read-manga/aporia/
While yes, BJ Alex has a slightly better portrayal of BDSM compared to other bl's, it falls behind Aporia A LOT.
Yes, safe word is one. The people who will be in the BDSM plays should also have to negotiate about their soft limits and hard limits, among many other things, and, if not all, then most of the things that were discussed will be included in a BDSM contract.
Yup. BDSM contract is a thing.
If you said contract thing umm does what md and chanwoo did is real then. I mean they write the contract physically and not just discussing the limit on talking only. Or it depends on some partners
This help me a lot on seeing many red flag in this kind of relationship. But since I'm new in this topic may I ask. You don't need to answer if not okay but yeah does subspace and aftercare happen irl. Since I don't see a lot of this on the manga and manhwa here.
Im sorry, but I dont really get your sentences. Are you asking a question or stating an opinion?
Don't ask me i only have known about bdsm through a manga
Yes aftercare is VERY important. Allow me to quote Squibbles:
"Usually, having a BDSM session is pretty intense on both parties but especially the sub (especially if they experience total loss of control in the hands of their Dom). Because of that, many people tend to feel drained and even a little disoriented afterwards. There's a phenomenon called the "sub-drop" which refers to an intense feeling of guilt/anxiety after a BDSM session, not because they regret it but because the endorphins (aka chemical compounds in your brain that activate when you feel good) stop. Even if there's no sub-drop, most subs like a bit of aftercare to feel safe and reassured that their Dom is there for them and cares. So yes, it's a common thing and not offering/providing aftercare is generally considered very bad manners, even if it's just a singular session with a partner you won't see again."
I'm pointing a question as does they usually write down all the limit and made contract like md and chanwoo or it depends on some partners?
Act it the same for me but then the more I read the more I interested in this topic to know what right and wrong on it
Ah I see. I cant say that ALL partners create and sign contracts. However, a BDSM contract is VERY important incase something goes wrong and the situation escalates to a point where the people involved will need to use it as an evidence for legal purposes (aka lawsuit and such)
Ouh I understand. Thank you for answering all my questions
Mhm youre welcome! Feel free to message me anytime if you have more questions :">
That would be nice I will gladly ask you if there anything I don't understand under this topic ⁄(⁄ ⁄·⁄ω⁄·⁄ ⁄)⁄
So each bl story I have read and read the comments all said the consent are important. Yeah they are fking important. So how d9es people with bdsm give they consent n what about punishment play. Im sorry if I'm too direct. I just doing some research on this kind of topic. Feel free to answer(⌒▽⌒)