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hime_13 June 25, 2021 4:44 am

Can someone who had read the novel clarify this for me please: Did she verbally abuse him? How 'bout physically? Did the servants do something to him while growing up? Then why the fuck did he grew up to be a prick?! Ah, don't get me wrong. I wasn't merely pointing out his way of talking to his mom but with others in general. I could definitely see that he is his dad's son because of that personality. He INTENTIONALLY says hurtful words( ̄へ ̄)

He isn't even some poor fellow from the slums. He's the heir to a dukedom and is given the best education, clothing, food and shelter. So what went wrong? (personality-wise i mean)

Also, it's one thing to be rude to your mom on closed doors but to disrespect her in front of others? Hah. No wonder even the servants dared to ignore her because of both you bozos father and son (╬ ̄皿 ̄)凸

Responses
    Fab June 25, 2021 7:00 am

    She neglected him, which is a form of abuse in and of itself. Tho she may be trying to make up for her mistakes, it's understandable that he'd still be a bit hostile because he's scared of being abandoned by her again

    hime_13 June 25, 2021 8:23 am
    She neglected him, which is a form of abuse in and of itself. Tho she may be trying to make up for her mistakes, it's understandable that he'd still be a bit hostile because he's scared of being abandoned by he... Fab

    A bit? Why not simply state the obvious. He's a brat. Heck, I could even somewhat understand if he gave her the blank look or whispered 'bitch' onto her ears but to make snide sarcastic remarks in front of an audience not caring for the house' reputation? This is not merely a 'family problem'. Did he even stop to think how would the other nobles view them?

    YUU_NG June 25, 2021 9:07 am
    A bit? Why not simply state the obvious. He's a brat. Heck, I could even somewhat understand if he gave her the blank look or whispered 'bitch' onto her ears but to make snide sarcastic remarks in front of an a... hime_13

    I don't know if you have ever experienced that kind of neglect that she has given him
    But the sudden change in attitude is kind of hard to accept as the kid
    You have to understand that for him, she has always neglected him and kind of given him the impression that she never wanted to have him
    To suddenly take such an interest in him is like a cognitive dissonance

    As the kid you still don't know if she has an ulterior Motive
    Like if she's doing this just for show or her own conscience but not actually because she cares for him

    Before he probably had to reason with himself as to why she acted the way she did (when she still neglected him)
    Like for example, yeah mother does not have the capacity to show love, that's why she has treated me that way

    But then suddenly one morning her whole attidue changed and all the things he told himself are invalidated

    And thoughts like, how come she is like this now, why not before when I really needed it
    Is this to show other people that she is a good mother? Or has she really changed

    Like this you can easily become angry
    Because for everyone else who has not known her before it just seems like she is a caring mother

    But his memories of her neglecting him are still very fresh
    It's almost like being gaslighted into believing she never did anything wrong

    But to remember what she has done to him, he lashes out or won't accept the affection

    Those are just my guesses
    I haven't read the novel, so this could also be off the mark, but I hope you have a better understanding for how he could have felt

    Fab June 25, 2021 10:37 am
    I don't know if you have ever experienced that kind of neglect that she has given him But the sudden change in attitude is kind of hard to accept as the kid You have to understand that for him, she has always n... YUU_NG

    Waaahhh you explained it far better than I did, hats off to you

    hime_13 June 25, 2021 12:01 pm
    I don't know if you have ever experienced that kind of neglect that she has given him But the sudden change in attitude is kind of hard to accept as the kid You have to understand that for him, she has always n... YUU_NG

    Nope, not neglect but my father abandoned us when I was in highschool and my mother had to work on a different city and would only come back at most once every few months because it was hard to feed us 6 siblings. Although I don't want to corelate my situation with this scenario. Different era, different values ┑( ̄Д  ̄)┍

    That's why I could only try to understand it in their mindset. The setting is medieval with aristocratic nobles. For someone like him who was deemed to have ' strict ' education you would think he should know better than to air family conflicts. Take for example that carriage ride with the lady in waiting. It was so uncomfortable for her to witness all that. She had to sit there like a statue (⌒▽⌒)

    1banana2potato June 30, 2021 9:22 am
    Nope, not neglect but my father abandoned us when I was in highschool and my mother had to work on a different city and would only come back at most once every few months because it was hard to feed us 6 siblin... hime_13

    Lol you know that they are just story characters and the author chose to write that to create more conflict

    1banana2potato June 30, 2021 9:26 am
    Nope, not neglect but my father abandoned us when I was in highschool and my mother had to work on a different city and would only come back at most once every few months because it was hard to feed us 6 siblin... hime_13

    Will if you think of it that they are real. it would be a bratty thing to do of what he did, but what do i know i have no knowledge of this kind of stuff or any experience of it

    「soft serve」 June 30, 2021 10:29 am
    Nope, not neglect but my father abandoned us when I was in highschool and my mother had to work on a different city and would only come back at most once every few months because it was hard to feed us 6 siblin... hime_13

    Not sure if I'm allowed to say this lol but my family situation was somewhat similar to what Vincente had to go through but obs without the politics and shit so it was just neglect and shit parents. It's like living with people you hate but you can't rlly leave them because you can't survive on your own. It was easy for me to sympathize with Vincente because I was in his position before. If we take out the family aspect of it it's basically 2 people who treat you like shit then suddendly one starts treating you like a human being in that case wouldn't you think "wow what a fucking two faced bitch" in that case it's similar. Imagine being bullied for you whole life then suddenly one of the bullies says they want to be friends with you wouldn't you hate them even more? Even if they did change that doesn't excuse the fact that they treated you like shit so in my opinion the way Vincente treats his parents and acts is completely understandable esp since I openly hated my parents too.

    1banana2potato June 30, 2021 11:12 am
    Not sure if I'm allowed to say this lol but my family situation was somewhat similar to what Vincente had to go through but obs without the politics and shit so it was just neglect and shit parents. It's like l... 「soft serve」

    Supp fren i too agree with your point even though i have no experience of such situations , in my mind i would definitely not like if someone who have neglected me for so long suddenly does a 180 and starts treating me good, that would make me uncomfortable and be more conflicted on why do they do that to me.

    「soft serve」 June 30, 2021 12:46 pm
    A bit? Why not simply state the obvious. He's a brat. Heck, I could even somewhat understand if he gave her the blank look or whispered 'bitch' onto her ears but to make snide sarcastic remarks in front of an a... hime_13

    Please try to understand why he's like that. His parents treated him like absolute dogshit so obviously that's all he knows. Ofc soon after he would have learned about manners and such but that doesn't change what's engrained into a person. He's like that because his parents neglected him and were horrible role models from when he was an impressionable child so it's not that he's a brat it's that he wasn't raised properly in the end it comes down to bad "parenting"

    JDHuman June 30, 2021 12:46 pm

    I'm about to go on a long ass monologue bec this story is hitting my feels. Too much in fact that I might drop it and wait until it's completed with a happy ending. Bec that's the only time I can feel brave enough to read this without triggering my depression.

    My situation is similar. Parents split up when i was an infant. They tried to make the marriage work when i was 7, but it only lasted a year. Dad left without saying goodbye. He hardly contacted me over the years, never paid for my needs even though he's from a rich family and has a booming career. He still wanted to control my life though. He pressured me to stay on top of school and send him pictures of my medals. Later, he didn't like my university and course, so he cursed me that I'll fail in life and that he would never help me even if i beg. I stopped trying to establish connection and relationship.

    Fast forward and I graduated and doing well with my life. He messaged me and wanted to make up. He's about to retire and was reflecting about his life. I was in a good place in my life so I accepted his invitation. I visited his hometown and met his siblings and relatives.

    Dad's way of "making up for lost time" was to schedule my visit on my bday week. He prepared a kid's princess bday bash with pink balloons and pink frosted cake with a princess figurine on top.

    My brain understood that this was him putting a good effort. But all i could think of was my bday after he left. That year he promised me a bday party at school with all my classmates. We were poor and i was fine with that, but dad gave me a promise even though i didn't ask for a party.

    Seeing MC's son in that party really gave me bad flashbacks. Being treated like a child when I finally accepted that I'll never have a conventional father that young me fantasized about. The neglectful parent acting as if s/he knows what I like or don't like, as if s/he knows who I am.

    The MC has good intetion. She's trying to show her son something that makes her happy. But just because she thrives in social gatherings doesn't mean her child does.

    My dad had good intentions. Maybe the 8yr old me would have been ecstatic for his efforts. But I never liked pink and princesses. I disliked barbie so much that I never had a doll. I was all about dinosaurs. Too bad he was too self involved he didn't notice it after spending a year with his child.

    In that party, all i could think of was "Wow, you chose not to get to know me all these 24 years. I know your favorite color, music, and food bec I craved to know you. But you're not the same towards me" I can logically understand his efforts, but I was grieving for the 8yr old me. Maybe the MC's son is feeling the same way since he doesn't know about MC's post partum depression.

    At least the MC is realizing her mistake and is trying to make up to her son out of love. My story will veer off here.

    Showing off their kids' lives is the sport in dad's family. Apparently dad's been boasting about my achievements and implied that he's been supporting me since I was a baby. He made all his relatives think that my mom was an unreasonable and greedy woman who tried to use me to get money from their family... for 24yrs. And apparently, he wouldn't have reconnected with me if I wasn't his definition of "successful".

    So I abruptly ended the party by announcing to everyone that he never paid shit even when he lived with us for a year. My mom had to leave me and work overseas just so I can eat. She supported my studies and daily living alone.

    Then I booked a hotel for the night, and a plane ride the next day.

    We are no longer in speaking terms. He messages me, but I just ignore him.

    1banana2potato June 30, 2021 1:35 pm
    I'm about to go on a long ass monologue bec this story is hitting my feels. Too much in fact that I might drop it and wait until it's completed with a happy ending. Bec that's the only time I can feel brave eno... JDHuman

    Im not gonna say that i feel bad for you because you owned it and got through that stuff so im just glad your doing good now and seeing you here on this site

    hime_13 June 30, 2021 2:17 pm

    Wait wait wait. You're all veering off topic. You're centering this around her mother when i'm pointing out his PERSONALITY. Meaning, how he acts in GENERAL.

    1banana2potato June 30, 2021 2:35 pm
    Wait wait wait. You're all veering off topic. You're centering this around her mother when i'm pointing out his PERSONALITY. Meaning, how he acts in GENERAL. hime_13

    Nah a kids a kid even if he acts mature his still a kid inside and with the sudden change in her mothers attitude he would be angry and confused and many emotions going through his head he won't be able to make a good judgement in what to do that's why he just erupted and acted rude because of this foreign entity trying to shove it's unwanted love to his face. Will the love that he wanted when he was a toddler but just accepted that he won't receive any. That's just what i think it is and my answer to your conundrum.

    hime_13 June 30, 2021 3:06 pm
    Nah a kids a kid even if he acts mature his still a kid inside and with the sudden change in her mothers attitude he would be angry and confused and many emotions going through his head he won't be able to make... 1banana2potato

    A kid? You call someone who's about to be engaged a kid? In our era, yes. But in theirs? Hardly.

    1banana2potato June 30, 2021 3:09 pm
    A kid? You call someone who's about to be engaged a kid? In our era, yes. But in theirs? Hardly. hime_13

    Forget it. it's a plot to make the story longer and complicated.

    hime_13 June 30, 2021 3:13 pm
    Nah a kids a kid even if he acts mature his still a kid inside and with the sudden change in her mothers attitude he would be angry and confused and many emotions going through his head he won't be able to make... 1banana2potato

    I'm sorry I sent that incomplete. Here's the other half:
    And again, you're getting examples on a scenario with her mom when I already emphasized that it's his personality and not merelyhis treatment of her that i'm pointing out. Try it with OTHERS. How does he fair with others? You're all making it out to be like his world is his mother LOL.

    1banana2potato June 30, 2021 3:21 pm
    I'm sorry I sent that incomplete. Here's the other half:And again, you're getting examples on a scenario with her mom when I already emphasized that it's his personality and not merelyhis treatment of her that ... hime_13

    They wear masks, alter egos. if in front of others his a proper nobel but when it comes to his mother his real self shows. I think......