Exactly!! Sometimes I wish I was just straight
Sexuality is complicated. A while back I read a book called “understanding asexuality” and I one of the chapters the author mentioned how love and sex usually go hand in hand but are separate things. So even though it’s rare, you can fall in love with someone that does not match your sexual orientation, you are just not sexually attracted to them. Since I’m asexual, I’ve always thought about love and sex as separate things anyway, but it was a very interesting thought to me when I read that. Since most people think they have to have sex with the person they love, and the majority of the time that’s how it works. If you’re straight you fall for someone of the opposite sex and you’re also sexually attracted to them, but it can happen that you can be straight, fall for someone of the same sex and not be sexually attracted to them.
As a bisexual girl I relate so hard. Had a crush on a girl for the first time in my life and at first I didn't even realize it. Like he said, I never ever thought it was a possibility. With girls especially there is already so much closeness and physical affection, it's hard to draw a line between typical girl behavior for yourself and that extra special feeling of a crush developing. To this day I haven't had the same intensity of feelings for another girl but what I felt for her was real.
Sexuality can be so much more complicated than just labels. There are people who have been attracted to one sex their whole life until they are to someone of the same sex. Sometimes it's just one person, sometimes it's the similar kind of person's. Sometimes people love both the sexes but only want to have sex with one. It can be so complicated for some people and so straightforward for others.