It can be annoying on the readers part to see someone's genuine feelings dismissed, but in that same way I think it's unfair to simply think that because she's suffered, she making others suffer and she's being selfish because of it. She's internalized her suffering as the way the world works, the natural order of things, and believes everything she says is factual, not hurtful. It was actually kinda funny to see how she reacted when Kaitz told her that no, love wasnt a transaction.
Realistically of course, I think it's natural for her to continue to live with her way of thinking as thats given her the way to survive in the capital. I've been liking her character more than in the beginning because despite her suffering she really isn't resentful or angry or wanting to harm others (tthats probably partly due to internalizing).
Still doesnt mean that hurting other people emotionally is good thing that should be normalized, but people are people and the author created this type of character and this relationship. I honestly think Kaitz is kinda boring because hes so normal-perfect (not to say the confession wasn't hella smooth and filled with more emotional intelligence and eloquence than I expected from him), but I'm willing to get judged for that too.
..... That was so smooth, Lord Kaitz....
I know some people will judge me for this.... I know FL went through so much but sometimes her words are so hurtful to other people, to the point idk if she is aware of it sometimes. Yeah I understand that part as well after what happened to her. I know she is honest and just want to live her life alone but if she really wanna do that, I think staying in the capital is not right for her. She should went away somewhere where it doesn't have any people at all. Or go to the forest and live there. I feel like its really unfair to some people who cares for you while you shrugged it off like it's nothing. I know she is hurt about what happened to her but I hope she will not hurt someone who cares for her just because she has trust issues and can't open her heart to anyone. just say go away or get lost or if they can't adjust go somewhere else. Its kind of annoying reading this sometimes but I also can't stop reading it.
I know you will judge me for this so yeah so be it