I think the guy’s decision was correct you will hate me for this, but if he told her that she slept with that purple haired girl, the relationship is surely over! Just like he said he was walking on eggshells with FL. The sleeping part the guy was drunk it was all the purpled hair girl’s intention. Keeping this a secret was the right thing to do to save the relationship! Just like the saying goes—what you don’t know wont kill you.
The problem here is the purpled hair, she should’ve shrugged it off like a one night stand kind of thing, just like the guy did. Everything that happened in the hotel stays in the damn hotel, but Noooooo! She was so in it to win it, she keeps on messaging him passive aggressively with the hope the gf could read it, and she was successful. Now the misunderstanding starts another relationship is bound to end.
I’m not victim blaming the purpled girl or anything, but she was the only sane at that time and the poor guy was drunk. If I can’t have you then I’ll make a mader fucking way.
Now that this misunderstanding will all snowball the relationship is bound to overthinking and anxiety. No longer healthy it’s good to just break up.
I think it's more disgusting to see it like that (Not you though). It's like what people say, "It's not murder, if there's no body." So basically you are choosing to hide the body and let it rot but it will eventually smell. The smell meaning the guy will feel so so guilty to the point he doesn't think he wants to see her. To the point he feels uncomfortable. To the point the girl feels anxious too. What is he exactly saving by then? Their relationship or himself? His guilt?
Think about it this way, the guy has no feeling for the other girl or anything he was drunk. The girl was intentionally taking advantage of the situation. Yes it was cheating, but he had 2 options.
1. tell the gf he blacked out that friday and ended up in bed with the coworker, this is risky the gf would either forgive him and the relationship will continue but the gf will no longer trust him, or they break up then and there.
2. Don’t tell her - save the 10 year relationship and yes he’ll be uncomfortable of course the guy would carry the hurt and guilt, that’s the price to pay to save the relationship. Consider his intentions behind hiding the truth. Is he doing it to protect the gf from harm, to spare their feelings. Will it lead to more harm than good if the truth is disclosed? Will it damage relationships or trust if the truth is hidden?
Girl it’s easy to say just tell her the truth, of course being honest build stronger and more authentic relationship, but in reality, there may be times when revealing the complete truth could cause harm or unnecessary distress to others.
So choose your own poison.
If it is easy to tell the truth, why is he still lying. He is just saving himself because he is scared. To think for you it's okay for him to feel uncomfortable and guilty as long as he's staying with her and lie to her face just to save their "10 years relationship". Relationships isn't about the higher the number, the better you must lie just to save it because it's gonna be a waste.
If you are the girl and you see your man doing all that. Avoiding you. Acting so uncomfortable. Acting so suspicious. Acting like they are hiding something. Would you just shut up just to save your relationship?
Because in what you are saying, that's just the point of view of the guy. Him being the "hero" because he gonna swallow every guilt to save what they have. What about her then?
Do you know what it feels like there is something so so wrong but your other half keeps on saying there's nothing? Everything is okay, when he is acting like it's not. It's like you are watching them fade away. Slip through your fingers. You want to fight for your relationship but you don't exactly know what for because they said it's fine.
Truth is better the lies.
White lies is still lies.
Who are we exactly fooling here?
It was the other girls fault for doing that criminal act to the other guy.
But it's his fault for lying.
I am not mad at you for saying this, this is just me speaking as someone if this happens to me. Whatever happened is already bad, but lying and hiding the truth is worse. If only he put himself in her shoes before doing it, he won't hide it.
I thought when you are in a relationship every decision you'll make would be for the both of you. In every action you need to think how it will affect you and in extension how it will affect your partner. It wasn't his fault for whatever that happened but whaat about what happened "after" :(( He deserves to have justice but she deserves to know the truth too and lying to her face would not help. Whatever happened to him, no one deserves that but the things that happened after could have been so much better.