Why do girls read Yaoi?

Let me explain…

Let me explain…
It all started with some lowkey gay anime.

I used to really dislike this type of anime or manhwa—especially when they featured a great female lead, but somehow the story still focused on the guy falling for another guy. I would think, What the hell? Why is this so gay? (I'm seriously not homophobic, by the way.) I just wasn’t into seeing two guys together.

Well… everything changed when I started Heaven Official's Blessing a few years ago. That was the turning point—it gave me exactly what I’d unknowingly been searching for: a truly beautiful love story. Unlike so many others, this one actually made you feel something. It wasn't just about physical stuff or toxic relationships like those you often find in certain manhwas.

So many of them include disturbing content—like non-consensual scenes and manipulative characters. Painter of the Night was especially hard to read. I honestly still don’t understand why so many people love it, considering the poor boy was basically raped repeatedly.

Anyway, Heaven Official’s Blessing made me curious—do other characters like Hua Cheng exist? The kind of person you’d willingly die for? And to answer your question: no, it doesn’t do anything to us. Besides making us feel sad, heartbroken… or maybe just enjoying watching two hot guys make out.

For me it just feels like a sneaking thing to read lol, nobody knows I read it it’s my own personal hobby just something for me.

I just read it cause I know this won't happen to me irl cause I'm a girl hahaha.

I've been wanting to ask this question too! I have some running theories for myself that I wonder if anyone else agrees with.

I think I enjoy reading toxicity because it's a way to engage with my own traumas at a distance; I get to identify with cinnamon roll type mcs without self-inserting since I don't have a peen.

There's also just the simple taboo of it all--most guys will admit to like watching girls go at it l, and I don't think women are weird for liking guys go at it.

And probably something involving patriarchy and toxic masculinity in worlds where women aren't centered and therefore not the victims like in reality. Take this one with a grain of salt because I'm not confident in how I'm articulating this idea...I want to word it better, but I don't know how ╮(￣▽￣)╭

All of this becomes grey when the author isn't clear on warning against or romanticizing these types of relationship dynamics. To anyone reading this, these stories are entertainment--not goals!

I hope more people throw in their opinions. I've been wanting to write an essay about this

Yaoi/BL is fun to read for me since it gets to explore the more intimate dynamics b/w guys, which isn't often seen or normalized in real life or popular media (although that's been slowly changing). As for the toxic stuff, for me, it's just fun to read smtg taboo as hell I guess and understanding that it is purely fictional (never applying or wanting that to be real ofc); also i sometimes enjoy reading toxic stuff in hopes for an interesting character growth/progression that would be satisfying (even if it's unrealistic lol)

read merry marbling, it's a wholesome one

I have no explanation honestly personally i think i enjoy it because its so far from real relationships! Most yaoi is not similar to real life gay relationships so the tense drama and high emotions in yaoi can be something i escape to without trying to relate to it

the plot and dynamic does it for me, tho some cases more of the plot

It's an escape for me. The more it is far from reality the better. And yaoi provides a wide range of plots to satisfy that.

ummm....... I'll just say what's mine based on my journey reading bl

At first, it was the thrill and excitement like you are entering a whole new world. (cuz I started reading bl when the pandemic hit. I was a 1st year highschool back then and my first bl read was BJ Alex, sadly)

In the middle years of reading these stuffs and after those almost repeatedly traumatizing experiences (thanking god everyday nothing happened to me), I realized that it was filling my void inside and it became my happiness, so much that it became my drug and addiction, that got out of hand. Plus, since no parent was supervising me, i mistook those feelings i got from reading as "love". and some things just... happened.

Years later on, I got selective of what i read. POTN, from memory, is still good to read because of the angst, the character development of the Seme, the creative build-up of problems, etc. But when some scenes gets too violating for me, i just skip those.

Now, what draws me to bl is the emotional journey of a boy loving someone of the same sex. It creates a fascinating dynamic that makes you curious to know what happens next, just like in a story I recently reread called Sign. Altho somehow, I don't enjoy reading gls but i can in novels (like the one in Madame by Sara Cate) oh, except from You Are My Bff found in Webtoon (maybe more in the future). You could also say that I enjoy reading this because it's unrealistic and has that unique drama.

I can't stand, let alone read, bl that screams "one of them is toxic" troupe, but sometimes when i feel like i can handle these things, some of them is a hidden gem like the "Define the Relationship" (i cried so much while reading this, aaaaaa) and "Pit A Pat"

that's all (づ￣ ³￣)づ

It's just what you're interested in.. because you're probably straight and want to see two hot guys together

I love men so i love seeing hot men together. Opposite gender doesn't make best chemistry as much as same gender does

Girl about a decade ago I used to not be about that gay shit at all and everything changed when I read Love is an Illusion. Now this is all I read because the stories are so much better than cis stories imo

>i’d rather see a guy in a toxic relationship than a girl
>i read straight romance too but only the happy ones bcs if i wanted toxicity- I just need to go to my parent’s house
>I’m not fond of seeing women struggling and being in pain :((

Thank you everyone that answered. I took me a while to find the section with the comments. But thank you for your answers. What I’m gathering is that it’s still hard to put into words why since we each have a different reason. Overall I do truly think this is a great topic to discuss especially for us women. May it be because we want to dissociate from this patriarchal world, or because we just like some taboo topics I truly believe we can learn more about this part of ourselves . Maybe someone one day will write about this!!!