For the ones defending Riftan, I understand your point but in no way is emotional abuse ok...

Agnes has studied Magic for a very long time and fought with them for a long time. Maxi has barely no experience and only studied for a couple of months.

You haven’t lost a loved one have you? Because if you had, you wouldn’t take lightly how a person can be over protective of the ones they loved. Human are flawed by nature and in Riftan’s case he had lost far too many important people in his life and with Maxi’s stubbornness both of them lost their child, that fact alone will be a haunting ghost to Maxi even after they both reconcile and made up. At the end of the story they didn’t have a child. They probably will or not in the future but the miscarriage did a lot of toll to both of them.

Well that's a valid argument but me losing people or not has nothing to do with this or my understanding and you can't assume that I haven't lost a or more loved ones. Here's the thing, she doesn't know she's miscarriaged, is it then fair to come in shouting and throwing a fit? What about her experience? Have you gone through a near death experience and had a parent and partner make you go through both mental and physical abuse? I think that riftans treatment towards her is very unfair and very mentally damaging and i think its vERY worrying that many are ok with him mentally abusing Maxi. Since she miscarriaged should he not be gentle with her and make sure to deliver the news with love and care?
Maybe it's best he didn't come and see her until he calmed down. HE risked his life too and could've died if she had not stepped up he should be VERY VERY thankful that she wasent selfish and risker her and past babys life (that she didnt even know of?). As i said before, the more he resist and restrict her like her father did the more shes going to rebel so he might aswell support her in her warrior Noble lady journey since shes going to do what SHE wants and thinks is the better choice because shes a grown woman who can make that choice. The difference being he has worked with this for years and can tell more than her when something is very risky to not and yes she was indeed very irrational but that wouldn't have happened if he had early on given her the support she needed to reach closer to the potentials Agnes has. As i said before, the Castle was almost invaded when she sat and waited for Riftans to come home, so is she truly safe? Danger could happen Anywhere my friend so its not bad to be taught self Defence or strategic thinking like Agnes that probably started somewhere too. She practiced like you said and Maxi had the time to prepare technically and she IMPROVED SO MUCH with that little support she got from everyone EXCLUDING riftan who throws fits constantly and refused to listen to what she wanted.

SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE IDIOTS IN THE BACK!

I’ve been saying this for ages: Maxi’s reckless decisions are a direct consequence of Riftan’s paranoia and overprotectiveness. If he had shown her even a *fraction* of trust or support, she would never have resorted to such extremes. Maxi is, by nature, obedient and reasonable—unless you force her hand, which Riftan does repeatedly throughout most of the story.

What aggravates me most about Riftan’s character is that despite being explicitly called out by other characters for his behavior, we never once see him genuinely reflect, apologize, or take accountability for the harm he causes in their relationship. Instead, it’s always Maxi who bends in the end, because she “loves him too much to see him suffer.” Her pain is consistently sidelined in favor of *his* feelings.

Several passages from Book 2 make it painfully obvious that the author intended for Riftan to face some form of reckoning—but spectacularly failed to follow through, choosing tasteless smut in favor of real characterization. The worst offenders are Chapters 119–123.

[MAJOR SPOILERS – Maxi confronting Riftan]

{Something snapped inside her. She latched onto his clothes and yanked with all her strength.}

“D-Do you think you know w-what I want better than I do?”

“You’re wrong! You know nothing! I chose to become a mage because I wanted to help. I chose to learn magic so I could be useful to you in any way I could! I went to the Mage Tower because I thought that was what was best for us. Do you know how painful it was to make that decision? The anguish I felt?!”

This line hits especially hard because at this point in the story, Riftan has been actively avoiding Maxi due to her decision to study at the Mage Tower—a decision she made to protect him. His behavior here is emotionally manipulative: he stonewalls her, ignores her suffering, and centers only one thing—that she left him. Her pain never enters the equation.

It continues:

{Riftan said nothing, looking down at her like a statue.}

“You think you’re the only one who suffered, don’t you? You never considered my pain for a moment! You act as though you do all this for my sake, but you’re really only thinking about yourself. You’re just protecting yourself from getting hurt!”

And she’s right.

We see this pattern reinforced again during the banquet scene in Chapter 117, when Hebaron gives Riftan a much-needed reality check. [SPOILERS FOR CH. 117]:

{Ursuline nervously stepped forward.} "I shall escort her ladyship out."

"Don't." {Hebaron said firmly, he then turned to Riftan.} "You plan to send her away, don't you? If so, you should not interfere with her decisions."

{Riftan glowered at Hebaron, who merely arched an eyebrow, daring him to refute his point.}

"Do you expect her to wait for you like a celibate cleric, despite your neglect?" {Hebaron said.}

"Watch your tongue, Nirtha! The Commander is only trying to keep her safe-"

"A fact her ladyship is unaware of." {Hebaron coldly interjected.} "You seem to want to keep her ladyship locked away in a gilded cage, but that is impossible. If she is that easily possessed, she can just as easily be snatched away."

"Watch your tongue," {Riftan said in a voice that sounded chillingly gentle even to his own ears.}

{Though Hebaron clearly had more to say, he held back when he saw the dangerous |lint in his commander's eyes. Riftan turned his gaze to his wife again, silently watching Sejuleu Aren walk her over to the group of Western nobles.}

What I loved about this scene is that Hebaron explicitly rejects the excuse that Riftan is “just protecting her.” He recognizes that Maxi’s rash actions are a direct response to Riftan’s emotional avoidance and control. Someone inside the narrative finally says what many perceptive readers have been seeing all along, and then the story completely fumbles it.

Instead of letting this confrontation lead anywhere meaningful, the author pivots straight into revenge sex and borderline sexual abuse as a substitute for actual communication (Ch. 119, novel readers IYKYK). Any chance of real character growth for Riftan collapses because his arc is sacrificed in favor of smut. The result is that his behavior is never truly reckoned with—just reframed as passion.

This is why I firmly believe Riftan’s POV side story exists as damage control. The author realized too late how underdeveloped he was in the main narrative and tried to patch it afterward. Sorry, but if I have to read a separate side story to understand your ML, you failed as a writer, no excuses.