Love hate relationship = confused me

I am so confused!! Mag was literally held captive, tortured, emotionally abused, drugged, manipulated, dehumanized, and basically there kept as a doll slave with extreme Stockholm syndrome. No because if Iliana was herself when she committed the crimes she did to him then i dont support her as the female lead. Then we learned her backstory and it was genuinely so much worse oh my god her poor family. At first I felt so badd for her that she was being constantly punished and criticized for something she did not do and they were genuinely serious crimes as well. Then I found out oh! She did commit them!! OH! AND THEN to find out she was going to kill her whole family and her plan was to eventually get them executed over something as dumb as her mother’s birth origin! She was a racist who couldnt even question the systematic system of racism built around the birth place of her mother and just like everyone else ( while living with her and expirencing her love and warmth) decided she deserved to die after all her mother had done to try to help her. She didnt ask her mom questions or anything just a one sided stern belief from evil and hatred that she decided to make her life’s mission to kill her mom. Im going to call before earth Lyna and after earth Ilyana. Its hard to believe that Lyna and ilyana were the same person and i still dont fully believe it en after the author ha told us straight up. I feel like Lyna was so so so undeserving of anything good in her life she belongs in jail for a very long time for her crimes. I don’t care if she was a child at the time i still believe she needs to go to jail because technically reading the book about her life she did end up doing all that. She deserves prision time!!! I wish Lyna and ilyana were seperate people oh my gosh i would fully accept and love this story so much more. It’s hard to believe that just with Lynas time on earth that she can fully change into what ilyana is because we even see it with lynas emotions that she would lash out at people constantly and she possessed such ugly heavy intense emotions that only Lyna would have because even ilyana recongized them and rejected them as her own because thats not who ilyana is. Why? Because they’re two seperate people with two personalities in my head. If its nature over nature why was Lyna so evil when she was given so much more support in her life while ilyana on earth was so good but i would argue given the opposite? That’s why I still think they’re two different people because both of those people have different personalities and different ways they respond to their upbringing and to people and only ilyana has guilt and repentance and genuine evil while ilyana despite her not good upbringing was still able to make the right choices and thoughts while Lyna couldn’t. Im mad at Magus to be honest. Ilyana never confessed to him she got all her memories back. There’s no way Magus is fully recovered from his Stockholm syndrome because how can he still fully love ilyana knowing all that she’s done to him because in the manga they are the same person ilyana and Lyna!! How can he forgive her so easily and give her so much freedom without thinking oh maybe shell start poisoning me again oh is she honest about this or am i about to become a beast again and etc. Magus is a victim and it hurts me as the reader for him to ( with struggle Igz) go back to the person who did all that to him like girl stand up pleaseee. I liked the couple together yk i do but its just remembering their past is what makes this story so difficult to digest and accept as a reader knowing their past and how wrong it is. I like the world building tho and the side characters, i like billy and i liked Ilyanas parents. The world building was done exceptionally well along with the mystery and internal thought provoking struggles they had. This story is good art because art makes you uncomfortable and makes you question it and truely think about it which im sure was not the authors intention at the very end with their cliche happy ending but definitely was at the start. I know the story definitely could’ve taken a darker route and even a lot more problematic. The story itself is problematic but thats probably what appeals to a lot of the people reading it, maybe me being confused and dumbfounded is only because i was not the target audience for sure.Im sure most people who are knowledgeable and familar with darker stories would have enjoyed this a lot and wouldn’t have any questions and be confused nor be morally unsure. I didnt hate this story at all it was a very good read actually with its world building and character devlopment. Everything was very interesting and captivating along with thought provoking which made the story feel very real and anticipating at times for me. This comment is not a thread to say the story is bad but rather try to come to terms with what the story really was and try to see and understand the thoughts of others and if I am the only one who feels this way. Anyways i lowkey loved the story guys even tho im like confused it was really really good at keeping me on my toes at times. Even tho i love the story i still can dislike the characters inside the story for their wrongdoings i am not endorsing that abusive is okay!