I still think this is a pretty good bdsm/ kink series all things considered but any real life dom who knowingly brings personal negative feelings into a scene to "take it out" on someone without the submissive's consent is bad heckin news. If they bring those feelings in by accident (we're all human, sometimes emotions get tangled up or come out in ways we don't expect) that's one thing. But knowing you feel genuinely angry/ hurt and using that anger/ hurt against your partner without them actively consenting to that type of dynamic? That clashes with a lot of consent forward mentalities that are super important in the kink scene and in relationships, especially BDSM ones.
It's happened twice so far in this series but the first time it felt more accidental/ unintentional and he owned up to it. But this second time it's super intentional and feels manipulative in a way that isn't kinky consenting fun.
I'm definitely still hopeful for this series and can forgive this if it's addressed and handled.
*Edit: After sitting on it, I think I'm less concerned than I was before. Not because any of that stuff is cool irl but because I think it makes for an interesting story to see a flawed Dom struggling to heal after a traumatic experience and reapproaching kink with someone he's in a genuine relationship with.
Navigating BDSM is complicated irl too sometimes. We're all flawed people and we're all learning. I think this story has the potential to tell a story with layers like that super well. And if this series isn't gonna tell that type of story and is just a kinky smutty fun time, I still think this is a pretty good read. It's a lot lot better for kinky smutty fun time than a decent amoung of BDSM manga/manwha because they're both genuinely having fun and care about each other.
I totally get if some people get turned off if bdsm/kink in media isn't well represented when they were really wanting and expecting it to be. That's super valid and there are times I feel that way with certain stories/ shows. That said, I'm always happy to have discussions about real life kink/ bdsm and help educate people about what is and isn't cool while also enjoying the fun unrealistic fantasy in a fictional series like this one.
I still think this is a pretty good bdsm/ kink series all things considered but any real life dom who knowingly brings personal negative feelings into a scene to "take it out" on someone without the submissive's consent is bad heckin news. If they bring those feelings in by accident (we're all human, sometimes emotions get tangled up or come out in ways we don't expect) that's one thing. But knowing you feel genuinely angry/ hurt and using that anger/ hurt against your partner without them actively consenting to that type of dynamic? That clashes with a lot of consent forward mentalities that are super important in the kink scene and in relationships, especially BDSM ones.
It's happened twice so far in this series but the first time it felt more accidental/ unintentional and he owned up to it. But this second time it's super intentional and feels manipulative in a way that isn't kinky consenting fun.
I'm definitely still hopeful for this series and can forgive this if it's addressed and handled.
*Edit: After sitting on it, I think I'm less concerned than I was before. Not because any of that stuff is cool irl but because I think it makes for an interesting story to see a flawed Dom struggling to heal after a traumatic experience and reapproaching kink with someone he's in a genuine relationship with.
Navigating BDSM is complicated irl too sometimes. We're all flawed people and we're all learning. I think this story has the potential to tell a story with layers like that super well. And if this series isn't gonna tell that type of story and is just a kinky smutty fun time, I still think this is a pretty good read. It's a lot lot better for kinky smutty fun time than a decent amoung of BDSM manga/manwha because they're both genuinely having fun and care about each other.
I totally get if some people get turned off if bdsm/kink in media isn't well represented when they were really wanting and expecting it to be. That's super valid and there are times I feel that way with certain stories/ shows. That said, I'm always happy to have discussions about real life kink/ bdsm and help educate people about what is and isn't cool while also enjoying the fun unrealistic fantasy in a fictional series like this one.