will preface by saying i don't think this manga is Bad. it had Vibes, but...
it kinda dodged the exploration of shou's dark urges, or just diverts to a different direction than i was expecting. "what i was feeling for you wasn't an urge to destroy. it was love from the start" good for him but not the climax i was looking forward to... like taking a sip of orange juice that's actually milk. like, it's fine, but i wanted orange juice... even when shou smashes keijirou with a vase and ties him up, shou's just lashing out because he's hurt/jealous, not really exploring his sexual desires in that moment.
stepping into the dominant/sadistic mindset is a personal interest of mine because i feel as if a lot of bl always take the pov of the bottom. nothing wrong with that--often, it's people's preference--but it leaves us with a shallow understanding of the top's perspective at times. i want to see his anxieties. how do you balance someone else's pleasure, and your own? is there an internal battle? what about a callousness? if there's empathy or guilt, and to what degree?
and i guess i just never bought into the chemistry between them. they felt like temporary bandages to each other's wounded psyches. kei's loneliness leading him to date a minor. shou's secret twisted lusts drawing him to seek out strangers (and where are the twisted lusts hmmmm??!).
and the ending with the time skip was super rushed...
will preface by saying i don't think this manga is Bad. it had Vibes, but...
it kinda dodged the exploration of shou's dark urges, or just diverts to a different direction than i was expecting. "what i was feeling for you wasn't an urge to destroy. it was love from the start" good for him but not the climax i was looking forward to... like taking a sip of orange juice that's actually milk. like, it's fine, but i wanted orange juice... even when shou smashes keijirou with a vase and ties him up, shou's just lashing out because he's hurt/jealous, not really exploring his sexual desires in that moment.
stepping into the dominant/sadistic mindset is a personal interest of mine because i feel as if a lot of bl always take the pov of the bottom. nothing wrong with that--often, it's people's preference--but it leaves us with a shallow understanding of the top's perspective at times. i want to see his anxieties. how do you balance someone else's pleasure, and your own? is there an internal battle? what about a callousness? if there's empathy or guilt, and to what degree?
and i guess i just never bought into the chemistry between them. they felt like temporary bandages to each other's wounded psyches. kei's loneliness leading him to date a minor. shou's secret twisted lusts drawing him to seek out strangers (and where are the twisted lusts hmmmm??!).
and the ending with the time skip was super rushed...