Dude I fucking write an essay and it was cut it. I think the use of emojis isn’t allowed.
Sage I love you. Marry me! You gave me an amazing night and now waking up with a wonderful morning. ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶
Ch 186 was truly romantic. Fucking love professor Heejae Kim.
Technically it's not for the manager but for Heejae, himself. However it's heavily associated for the sole fact the manager is the only non music professional that Heejae allowed to touch the piano and played it in the first place. So it makes sense for me and Heejae that he composed a new piece for Garam since he does want to put it in the past. I don't think it's just anxiety alone. The manager plays a pivotal place in Heejae heart because he carried that sort of understanding, resilience without any bias and actually tried to understand Heejea's heart AND music regardless of the brutal facade he builted. Notices others only tolerate Heejae because of his music. Remember the note the manager left behind for Heejae? Heart breaking
I agree that the manager played an important role in his way of behaving and later on his approach to Garam. Since I understand that the manager and Garam were warm people to him. No matter what he threw at them, in a their own ways, both remained there (but ofc not the manager). So indeed, the manager was important for the professor, and his appearance was a constant reminder of what he did.
Still; I don’t think the professor loved him romantically, or at least not in my mind. I think he was fond of the manager, he found him interesting and likable. However, they way he behaved and continues behaving to Garam was completely different. As you said the manager wasn’t a professional player; thus, the professor never expected perfection from him… but for his students was another face. That’s why I cannot compared them as equal involvement.
So yes, both love(d) the professor for who he is, the whole package but still both relationships were built differently, and that’s why for me the first song wasn’t meant for anyone but shared with the only two people who got close to Heejae but this second one, it was only meant for Garam, knowing that only he could see what it meant for the professor to create such a piece.
It amazes me how we dissect chapters… I love this community
Yeah I think it's a subtle crush on the manager. I'm struggling to find word and just end up calling it work crush because for sure at that stage, Heejae emotional constipated ass couldn't feel anything remotely romantic but it's definitely above just being platonic haha. I guess it's the early stage of butterflies in the stomach???? The manager undoubtedly did some ground work there for my son (thanks the lord).
And what I meant when I said he wasn't professional, it's not about talents or on equal footing, I mean he knew he was never good enough to chase the career he would wanted. But he loved Heejae's music first and enough to work under him. There's this sort of admiration, respect but curiosity and innocence just for the sound/music and I guess it's intriguing to Heejae to see some one with lesser talents, lesser privilege than him share the same notion. Compared to others students where they were desperate to get Heejae's favour and acknowledgement or have a very skewed image of Heejae in their head. This very ordinary dude just appreciated for how it was and somehow understood his soul and I think that's refreshing from Heejae's POV. That's why he got a pass to play the piano and listen to the no1 in the first place.
Deep down I think Heejae prefer the music where he didn't have to play to this political/ toxic game and highly hierarchical(where he is a part of it and contributing to it) and he likes people to some degrees; especially someone that has that unpretentious appreciation for the music. Its just unfortunate the managee died before anything substantial could happen. Ugh. So I'm not saying the manager and Garam is equal in that sense. (I am an Garam's advocate and its before Garam and after Garam kinda situation). I'm saying that the manager is a milestone of the past and Heejae managed to look at it and progressed (hopefully no more regret) with Garam. His 1st piece was partially completed because he never knew what he was missing when searching for it; but the 2nd piece is a much much clearer picture, and it's the warm , comfort and love in the shape of Garam.
First of all, I’m glad this is censored because I couldn’t have handle seeing Professor’s pianoforte in all his splendor (ofc I can, I’m just pretending).
Second, the professor always taking care of Garam’s health through nagging reminded me who much of a couple they are, they are so fricking gay. I’m always tell my bf to apply skincare and put fucking solar protection . So I related to that.
Ch 186 was truly romantic, Heejae prepared everything for a perfect date, watching Monet, eating at a nice restaurant, going for what I think was jazz and enjoying a good evening to end it up with the song. A song were the professor throughout the whole process had Garam in his mind.
I’m glad, bc many people complained that the professor first OG song was for the manager, which wasn’t, but okay. Second, always saying that he was thinking of the manager which again he wasn’t it was his anxiety in the form of the manager. But here, no manager, no anxiety, just the feeling of being in love and apart from your baby boy.