THAT WAS SUCH A GOOD ANALYSIS!!! I love how you perfectly captured and explained the different way Compton is projecting his feeling, emotions and expectations of heeja on garam.
Compton makes me so very sad and it's even sadder that whatever he tries to do just ends up digging himself into a deeper hole. Leaving the piano for orchestra but the hatred carries over, forming a comrade in heeja's "victims" and end up lashing on them just as much. I'm wondering that when this arc completes, will he pick up piano again? it's so intriguing to think how his whole essence changed under his apprenticeship(?) under heeja. The greenery of his landscape when playing his music turned sinister the more he let's his hate guide him.
Also discord where ?? I would love to get to talk to you more about NME and what else you thought of it!!! if you'd like to maybe we chat over discord or dms ??
I am so ready for the showdown between the crashout king vs meltdown princess.
Also heres a quick analysis on why Compton fixates on hate so much like the emotionally repressed little bitch(somehow I still care for him just like Heejae and Garam, not as much as Garam though) that I already sent the general message on discord but then edited it to something a bit more refined:
The reason Compton clings onto hate so much is because Heejae pushes that narrative on all his students to explain why he treats them so harshly. Compton knows in his mind that it is an excuse for Heejae's inability to be a nurturing person instead of a knife but he still tries to communicate in the language of hate because that is the only one Heejae knew before Garam came into the picture.
To Heejae's students he cements his hatred as to convince the students to leave the professor as well as proving that he is Heejae's best disciple in his teachings of hate. He must isolate and maintain the knife-like Heejae because that version of Heejae is the one Jeffrey idolizes. This veneer of hatred crumbles as soon as someone ignores Compton's past as Heejae's earliest student as he would be the first to point it out and then madly rave about him to whomever listens to this addict.
He desperately wants to prove himself to Heejae centering his whole life on his former teacher. He remembers Heejae's favorite drinks, he formed a company to entice Heejae's student to join him, and will only interpret Rachminonoff's complex emotional turmoil as hate so his sound can finally be acceptable to Heejae since Heejae already rejected Compton's former one. Like a devotee he clings on every word to the extent where he can't even play piano anymore and whenever he tries he gets physically sick due to Heejae's words, telling Compton might as well never play like that again. A pianist's sound reflects their soul and with Heejae saying its heresy, Compton's very being becomes blasephemy leading to Compton rejecting himself. The once young boy gentle like a lamb sheds his sheep skin to become a wolf-like preacher leading prayer for the unimbued masses through the language of hate just as his god taught him. As his god bases his life off of music, Compton centers his life off of Heejae and his method of worship is deep sated devotion masking as hate.
But love for a god cannot be compared to the same wholesome, compassionate love Garam champions. It is twisted thing filled with skewed impressions of a person fractaling into distance, obsession, and resentment. A worshiper may praise their god one day and the next they will curse their god's very name as soon as misfortune befalls them. It is an addiction to leave one's fate to the heavens instead of taking responsibility for their own actions and Compton has mastered this to an art. He forgot who he was before Heejae and can never imagine his life without him like an addict in the midst of a highs and withdrawals.
One day Compton may break free of his addiction and I think he is in the process of right now with the help of Garam making him realize that Heejae is not an immutable force but rather a flawed person same as him. Garam is always depicted as a force of nature that topples others' preconceptions causing those who have closed off their hearts to change. This was done to Youngjo, Valter, Heejae, and perhaps the author wants Jeffrey to change as well. Its sad that it is up to Garam to be the harbringer of change rather than Heejae realizing his own mistakes and owning up to them for the sake of the people he has hurt, but sometimes the messiah has to bear it all to go against the false shepherd.
Side note: I theorize that Compton's sound was like a green pasture where lambs graze due to Heejae's bias towards gentler sound with Garam's and Valter's former one. This coupled with the author's twitter having a younger Jeffrey holding a lamb looking so happy and innocent makes me think that he is a lamb.