I adore the MC & ML & the plot is good for the most part but it lacks cohesion & feels random at times.
The MC invests in a scheme a friend recommends, to make money using his own savings but then owes money to loan sharks- why? It’s implied that his friend who recommended the money making scheme took out the loan & put the MC’s name on it as a cosigner without the MC’s knowledge but how is that even a thing??
The MC & ML were good friends in high school but the MC just randomly totally forgets about the ML & no longer recognizes him? The ML recognizes the MC but never says anything- why?
The MC decides to become a gangster to work off this random loan & find the guy who scammed him. He gets a job working for the loan sharks & the ML is the boss. The whole working to pay off the loan situation is vague.
The MC was in his second year of law school on a scholarship when this all happened. It’s unclear if he dropped out or is taking a break. I get that authors will do this & wrap things up throughout the storyline but these things all just feel random to me.
Overall I like it but feel like it cld be so much better.
I adore the MC & ML & the plot is good for the most part but it lacks cohesion & feels random at times.
The MC invests in a scheme a friend recommends, to make money using his own savings but then owes money to loan sharks- why? It’s implied that his friend who recommended the money making scheme took out the loan & put the MC’s name on it as a cosigner without the MC’s knowledge but how is that even a thing??
The MC & ML were good friends in high school but the MC just randomly totally forgets about the ML & no longer recognizes him? The ML recognizes the MC but never says anything- why?
The MC decides to become a gangster to work off this random loan & find the guy who scammed him. He gets a job working for the loan sharks & the ML is the boss. The whole working to pay off the loan situation is vague.
The MC was in his second year of law school on a scholarship when this all happened. It’s unclear if he dropped out or is taking a break.
I get that authors will do this & wrap things up throughout the storyline but these things all just feel random to me.
Overall I like it but feel like it cld be so much better.