This is so tough on the heart. I feel so bad for the poor mom and damaged kids. The father...

I think rather than the dad vein ineffectual its important to think about this manga culturally. Idk what country you live in, but even in the US mental health isn't well addressed and mentally healthy people rarely understand what is happening when their partner or child starts acting like this mother. Japan is even more conservative and bad about talking about emotions and mental health. It has one of the highest suicide rates. The father here is displaying a very typical male Japanese man's perspective. He is seeing this through the lens of being his responsibility. He thinks he's done his duty and the male of the household well, works hard, supplies money, food, etc. so he can't understand why she's unhappy because that means (in his mind) that he has failed. He will not tell his sister because if she finds out the wife is unwell in his perspective that means he has failed as a man and husband. He also dismissed his child's clear speech problem as no big deal. If he were less conservative he'd be getting his child and wife help because they're clearly greatly affected by what happened. He just can't understand because he thinks they're all going through the same thing but he's coping so why aren't they? The male/ father figure also usually is the one to typically deny help due to problems with ideas about masculinity. For example, I grew up with very clear anxiety and a learning disability and later developed depression. It was very clear I was not okay. As a child I didn't understand what was wrong with me/what was happening but to adults it should have been very clear because as an adult now its very clear to me. But my dad constantly talked my mom out of getting me help.


This manga is just so crazy intense and realistic in its portrayals of people and mental health

When your son is so traumatized he stops being able to talk, I don't care what country, it would seem natural to go to a doctor and get some help. And if your wife starts acting loony to the point she might hurt your kid, pack up and take him away. But I agree, mental illness is not properly addressed in many, many countries. Until recent years ,it wasn't in mine. Things change slowly.

But this dad seems really, really clueless. Wife is bonkers. Son is suffering from mutism. He does nothing.

And I suffered from depression forever....but my parents, great and loving folks, just saw it as me being quiet and moody. No, I was thinking about offing myself constantly and locking myself in my room. Since I had friends and never did rebellious things (like drinking or running around or being disrespectful) and was a good student, it didn't occur to them that I really hated myself and wanted to die cause I was so miserable internally. Depression as an actual physiological condition has finally gotten some respect. Back then it was, "Just cheer up." But I didn't go mute or look terrified all the time or scream weird shit like these people are doing. They are being pretty open about having issues.

I wasn't saying what I said to condone what he did, I was just trying to explain how it could happen because to me too its just so unreal that his child could become so clearly impaired and trouble and he doesn't do anything. I definitely think his parents have let him down and are awful at parenting, but I was trying to say the reasons why parents don't help their mentally ill kids because I too was a very obviously mentally ill kid and my parents didn't get me the help I needed because of some of the same reasons at play here. When things go from what you think is normal, to a level of bad you've never seen before, to a degree you don't understand or recognize, people convince themselves things aren't as bad as they are. It makes sense, with depression for example how can you know how bad it is if you've never experienced it or have never been taught about it. You learn once you take the steps to do so and sadly that usually only comes after things like suicide attempts

Its different for everybody and their family dynamics. For example, I was a good kid, energetic and very well behaved. And then one day, watching me have panic attacks, having screaming matches at the top of our lungs, it became normal. Me staying in my room and never leaving the house besides for school became acceptable. I completely changed and was so obviously sick. I sobbed every morning. The signs of depression were all there but they did nothing. How do you come back from that? When it goes so far, and you told yourself it was going to fix itself and that your kid was going through a phase, how do you recognize when its gone past that and that you've fucked up and that it won't get better without intervention? Usually, you don't. But I think with the manga its a different situation but similar logic. He's not just depressed. He saw his mother kill his closest friend, his cousin. I think back on being 13 and can't imagine how that would have destroyed my mind. Its obvious to us that something is wrong but the father here is in denial and believes that its due to the accident he doesn't even know the details of. He thinks his kid is suffering because his cousin is a vegetable, not because his wife is severely depressed and abusing their child and other kids, because who would think that? But you'd think any reasonable person would seek medical help when their 13 year old stops being able to speak properly. Its just sad. People need to be educated on mental, emotional, and social health. But apparently calculus is deemed more important to the general population that learning how to live healthily.

Yeah, I can see where the Father might think it's about the cousin's trauma. Too true. But he still needs to see a profesisonal. When your kid stops talking--that will affect school, work, everything. I guess he thinks it will pass. But damn. If my kid stopped talking, I'd be calling for a medical appointment to make sure it's not a physical impairment thing (tumor, blood imbalance, etc) and asking for a psych referral.

And after that outburst by the mother, he should have a clue. Like, "Hey, nutjob here might hurt my son. Lemme stay over at a relative's with son for a while." :-/

Well we see a little bit of the dad noticing the mom's bad influence because he takes their son to the hospital to see his cousin after the mother already was saying no and that the son didn't want to go. The dad saw through that. But then again, maybe he didn't and just wanted to make his son do what he thought was "right" which would be to go see his cousin. The worst and saddest part here is that mental health is an extremely taboo topic in Japan and people with mental illnesses are seen as just crazy, not people that can get better with care and proper help. The dad refuses to see his son and wife's illness because to him it would now make them "other". If other people saw them acting weird, they would be excluded from Japanese society, not helped. Japan sees it as so taboo that thats why the father won't accept it or get help. He's in denial because in his mind it would mean his family is already done for, over. Even if the dad does eventually help the son he will only be seeing it as getting the mother away from him because she's "crazy and a bad influence, she's corrupting him" instead of getting them both help.

That's how it was here when I was young. 1. Depression wasn't seen as a legit illness and 2. "Crazy" (ie severe mental illness) was not something you publicized or wanted known about the family. I'm really glad it has made progress. A lot of people could be helped and saved from suicide if we got better globally at identifying and helping those who are in distress, from milder to more severe forms. I guess what I am wondering is if the mother is just actually chronically criminally insane. What has she done all along we don't know about.