Hi guys, would anyone like to give a third person opinion on who is in the wrong in this case?

Who is being unreasonable?

That took forever to read haha, but I definitely think that the other person is being unreasonable and they are acting like a child though I don't know what story you're talking about I think I've got enough information to know what it's about. You made great points to get what you were saying across to the other person it's like every word you said went through one ear through the other to them lmao.

Thanks for reading all of it, it sure was a lot. I was thinking the same thing but at the same time I have and sometimes am unreasonable without knowing so I wanted an outside opinion. Once again, thanks so much for reading all of it as it truly was a lot.

No problem :)

you...were doing alot and taking it way too personal. just my opinion. you were the one who made it more than what it should've been.

Can you explain how I took it personally? Do you mean as in I was rude to her or something?

you took her or his little comment in which they meant no harm in and turned into an HUGE thing trying to berate them for no reason. it was a little gross and condescending, it seemed like you were just looking for an arguement really. i'm sorry.

No need to be sorry, I also think the same as you.

No need to be sorry as you did nothing wrong. I will give a bit of context and also attempt to kinda show my interpretation of what was going on.

In terms of the rudeness and condescending (I guess that's what you were apologizing for), it was mutual. In the beginning, I started off as the rude dick but I chilled out towards the end and for them, it was the opposite.


The line I have an issue with is "the abuse she had in that other dude's house was also stuff she allowed to happen to herself."

Context: From birth, Edna was told to spend her life pretending to be a man in order to be able to inherit her father's wealth. Her father was an insane man and since people didn't like that they invaded the castle and killed everyone in sight. Edna was given no choice but to escape by herself as her mother and everyone she knew and loved burned alive. From that point onwards she lived as a maid and was severely abused which is evidenced by her scar covered back - from the scaring it was some kind of a thin long stick. After losing her only life goal, watching/hearing all her loved ones die and getting betrayed (was supposed to receive help but didn't.) She had nightmares about it (chapter 1) once after waking up (from what I can only consider was another nightmare) she tried to jump into a flame.

Why I had an issue with this: Clearly mentally unstable even after living the "dude's house" so there is no way she could have been in the right state of mind to make the decision to "allow" someone to abuse her. And also, you don't give permission for somebody to abuse you. And it implies that she is somehow to blame as she "allowed" herself to get abused.

More context: Later on in the story we find out that she is very skilled at fighting with weapons.

Thus when later on they said "he is no one to be raped haha" they were referring to the fact that she is physically strong and can defend herself. (But please consider the power imbalance, no weapon, outnumbered, she was playing the role of a main and was trying to hide her identity > so I'm pretty sure that her beating everyone at the mansion wasn't really an option..)

I saw that and commented "wtf is wrong with you" which I will admit was rude and pretty pointless on my part. I have previously stated above that it was not rape as consent was given and not withdrawn at any point (after she was no longer working for that dude at the mansion where she got abused, she ended up as the bride of the ML, they fucked and he was rough).

They replied by describing the story, which I read so that was pretty pointless. Then they followed that up with explaining that it's not rape when I myself had previously stated that it wasn't rape.

And from there it went wild.

I wouldn't really care that much about this if this was a specifical manga-based issue that did not exist in reality. But it happens in real life and honestly, if they evaluate the situation like this then wouldn't they do the same thing if it happened for real? Imagine saying that an abuse-victim allowed their abuser to do such a thing. That's the number one "No" thing that you can say as it implies that they are to blame for their abuse. In this case, I don't think that they consider psychological factors.



If after reading the context you still think that I made a big deal out of nothing then let me know, I will give it a few days and then try to re-evaluate the thing again with a fresh mind. Idk, maybe I will see it from a different angle. Also, if you think that my reasoning from above was wrong at any point then let me know too, I won't reply right away and will give myself a few days to consider it because right now I don't think there is away in which you can say that what I wrote above it's wrong - not the right mindset to consider it.

Like I 100% agree that I was a dick (in the beginning) so I'm not asking about that.

Could you also let me know what you think about the rest of the comment section between us? As in the whole thing. I get that it's long but if you have the time then please do as long as you don't mind as that was what I was asking about. I suppose I should have made that clearer.

Good manga, intresting plot and honestly this was all over a really small part of the story. It starts with one comment and before you know it you have straight-up written essays.

Yeah but I don't find their comments as harmful as you make them, them describing the story was for you to understand their point of view, of how they view that abuse as being something that the character allowed because she is strong, even went to the point of describing her mentality for allowing that, and that's why I don't find anything wrong with their comments, it's a story, anyone can interpret it as they want, not everyone will have the same interpretation and just because that's the way they interpret that situation doesn't mean they are ok with this in real life, once again it's like trying to claim people who like yaoi with rape in it as rapist or like rape in real life, or people who likes FPS games as being psychos, etc.

Not even once on their comments I found them being rude to you, on the contrary. I've been on the internet for quiet some time already and whenever I read a discussion in which one party starts to use caps and/or use foul language is the moment when I know I can't take them seriously.

But well this is just my opinion, and sorry if my English is not good enough.

Nope, it was just them describing what happened in the story. They basically just described the story to me as though I haven't read it and then concluded that it was not rape - which doesn't need to be explained as at that point I have already stated that I did not think it was rape. What they said has no interpretation. Just boils down to:
-at first, they did not like each other
-the author planned the story
-things are one way at the beginning but then change
-they got to know each other and fell in love

Those are basically hard facts, things that happened that no one would even argue against.

And since I did not and don't think it was rape (consent was given and never taken back) then there is no need to explain to me that it wasn't rape.


I agree with you that someone might like yaoi manga with it but it doesn't mean that they like rape in real life. But here is the thing, I wasn't arguing with them over if it was or wasn't rape, I wasn't saying anything like that. I also don't have anything against the author (I gave it 5/5 stars)

I was arguing with them over whenever or not Edna chose to be abused. There is nothing wrong with reading yaoi manga with rape in it but if you start saying stuff like "they chose to be raped" or that they "agreed" to getting raped or that it wasn't raped then that's where I see an issue. I think that by my username alone you can tell that I like yaoi and there is plenty of rape in yaoi and guess what, I read a lot of yaoi with rape in it. Did I have any issues with the author? With the manga or with anyone else who read it? No. Because none of them were trying to argue that it was not rape.

But here is the thing, we weren't talking about whenever or not it was rape because that manga (not yaoi) did not have any rape in it and I acknowledged that so many times yet they went on as though I was trying to argue that the FL got rapped.


If you did not find them being rude to me then you haven't read all the comments.
"oha wow....haha first i thought this was interesting....seeing as you do not get to discuss with other readers such deep topics and ideas....but you obviously are waaaay to invested emotionally haha...sorry that is no fun though....as soon as you lose all objectivity and rationality during a discussion with an anonymous party you clearly diqualify yourself....no fun....as soon as i read swine, you were gone bye bye....grow up, learn to focus and actually see what the other is saying and not subjectively analyze them to your own convenience....boring" > the whole comment was rude and condescending.

Sure I did use caps lock to say "I AM NOT SAYING THAT IT WAS RAPE", just so they would see the one thing I was trying to make clear to them. They were arguing me as though they thought that I said that the FL got raped, while I was arguing with them about the FL getting abused (the abuse and her having sex were 100% separate.) Yet for some reason, they kept arguing that she did not get raped...which I wasn't arguing against. I was arguing that:

1)she got abused before she met the ML (which is just a thing that happened)
2)she did not choose to get abused. - they stated that she agreed/allowed that to happen to her.


I did my best to explain it in my reply to Uzumakii, I am not saying that it was rape as it wasn't. Let's say that we were talking about a manga with rape in it, I wouldn't care if someone says "I don't care that it was rape as it isn't real" or "it doesn't matter if it is rape as it's a work of fiction" which is the basic login behind why we are ok with yaoi that has rape in it. I'm certain that all of those yaoi readers who like bl with rape aren't gonna go out and rape and or condone rape. I am talking about someone who got physically abused (scar covered back). They are saying that she allowed that/chose to get beaten. I am saying that it's not possible to give consent to get physically abused (not sex which wasn't eve abusive - just rough, I am talking about her getting beaten)


I have been online for a long time too. A very, very long time. I had great, horrible and pointless discussions. I saw strawman arguments but never have I ever seen someone who completely refuses to acknowledge anything that I am saying.


Also, btw it's cool if it ain't your first language and if you make spelling mistakes or anything like that.