deli's Topics (327)

Oh they both LOVING it-

There is something so profoundly romantic about falling in love with every version of someone across every timeline.

I NEED MORE 100 CHAPTERS ON ALL THE TIMELINES AND MORE

What a devastatingly haunting tragedy.

I have avoided this story for the longest time because I was under the impression that this was one of those stories glorifying rape due to the ‘rape fetishization’ discourse surrounding this manhwa online. For some reason I thought the ml was the one who was going to inflict pain onto the mc (perhaps because of all the countless manhwas that turn into porn without plot). I only picked this up recently after being recommended this story when I asked for angsty bl recommendations here, and thought why not see for myself what people are talking about.

Truly, what a hard read this was. I needed to take multiple breaks while reading this. There were times I felt so suffocated, like I couldn’t breathe. It made my skin crawl with dread. There were times I felt so angry that I didn’t know what to do about it, times when I gripped at my own hair, pulling it because my heart ached so much for Geom. Yet, I still kept reading because I wanted to know what happened to Geom. I wanted to see him persevere, to survive, to be free. After reading ‘Missing love; A married man’ I have come to my own conclusion: this story was never meant to be ‘rape fetishization’. Reading this story and claiming it fetishizes rape means you have completely missed what the author was trying to do. This story was meant to be deeply uncomfortable; it was meant to suffocate you and leave you disgusted. It was meant to show you how ugly reality is for people who’ve been sold into prostitution, forced to give up their autonomy. It’s meant to show how cruel fate is where you never truly get justice even if you fight to survive; how society fails you over and over again; how parents destroy their own flesh and blood; and how your experiences shape you for the rest of your life.

While reading this story, I have formed such a strong attachment to Lee Geom. It’s devastating how he never truly knew peace (till he finally became free). It was so hard watching him at every stage of life. When he was young, he learned how to use his ‘beauty’ to his advantage. He was already used to being objectified as if he wasn’t even human. Constantly targeted sexually by men who desired him because he looked ‘pure’. His mother was his shelter, until she wasn’t. She wallowed in her own despair and had him bear the burden of her own loneliness. Though perhaps she did love him in her way at times, she was too consumed by the void she had in her heart that she filled it by abusing her own son. Even so, this might’ve been the time in his life he was the happiest because of Wooyeon and Yoonseo. They were kindred souls drawn to each other. To have him ripped away from his safe haven just when he found colors in his life was so devastating. The hardest part of this manhwa, was watching Geom get broken time and time again. Watching him try to run away but get dragged back every time made me so nauseous. They crushed him physically, tormented him mentally, yet he persevered. He is probably one of the strongest, if not the strongest, characters I have read about. He survived out of spite; he turned his helplessness to his strength and kept surviving. Even when there were times he was doing these ‘sexual acts’ to set his plan into motion, it was still so hard to watch because it was so clear how much pain he was in and how disconnected he was, being treated like a mere object of pleasure and lust. Geom reminds me of an executioner, a silent killer. He dismantled the system that ruined him and was ready to go down with it. The more I read the story, the more I mourned the death of the ambitious boy he was when he was with Wooyeon and Yoonseo. They dragged him away and broke his beautiful wings and expected him to take it all like an injured bird in a cage waiting for its end, but he defied what fate forced onto him and fought back. No matter how much they defiled him, his soul never gave in.

Im Wooyeon is my sweet angel boy. He makes my heart ache too. While everyone treated Geom like he was a ‘used whore’ he worshipped him like he was the most precious thing he had ever touched. Even after knowing about Geom’s past and witnessing such horrors with his own eyes, he never looked at him with disgust. While others wanted to break Geom, he touched him ever so gently, as if a slightly stronger grip would shatter him. His respect and love for Geom did not waver, no matter what he learned about Geom. He looks at Geom with so much love and warmth that it resonates with you even as a reader. In fact, his love for Geom is so pure that he was afraid of tainting him with it. It’s such a stark difference from how everyone else looks at Geom. Wooyeon is also heavily shaped by his past. He is a by-product of guilt. Someone who completely surrendered himself to ‘serve’ others, since he is plagued by his lingering guilt that he did not try to save his mother. This only intensifies after Geom’s sudden disappearance. He spends years losing himself to find pieces of Geom, even becoming a concierge because he believed becoming one would help him find some type of clue to Geom. Over the years, he endured and bottled his emotions behind a mask of sunshine, yet the moment his mask breaks is so devastating. When Reider tells him about how Geom was caught on the night of their college festival, it is the first time you see him completely shatter. His decision to push Geom away because he felt like his love was ‘sinful’ was what inevitably cost Geom his ‘life’.

Wooyeon is definitely not Geom’s saviour in the traditional sense. I believe Geom is his own savior. However, Geom needs Wooyeon. Perhaps Geom survived for so long because his love for Wooyeon ran so deep. Perhaps it got twisted with resentment along the way, but still it kept him going because he sought out Wooyeon at his lowest, even after 8 long years of torture. Wooyeon isn’t someone powerful; he is not some thug or a chaebol. He is not someone who holds much power in society that could easily free Geom from the hell he was trapped in. Yet, he did everything within his power and beyond to try to protect him. And he did. He sacrificed himself time and time again, trying to save what remained of Geom even if he was powerless. I think Geom needed someone who would love him as selflessly as Wooyeon. The part where he told Reider, no matter how much he gets tortured, and even if he were to die, if Geom was in front of him, he’d never scream because he doesn’t want to bring him any more pain, destroyed me. I hope only happiness for them from now on.

People don’t talk about Yoonseo enough. Geom, Yoonseo, and Woonyeon are kindred spirits, 3 parts of a whole. 3 children, victims of their own broken families. Geom’s mother gave him visible scars of her violence, and so did Yoonseo’s neglectful yet arrogant father and selfish mother. Their matching scars brought them together because they understood each other like no other. Wooyeon, on the other hand, was so addled with guilt for not doing enough to protect his mother that he instinctively became their safe haven. Their family failed them, so they became eachother’s family instead. Though Geom never liked Yoonseo romantically, he loved her as much as he loved Wooyeon. The same goes for Wooyeon, and of course she loved them both just as much. Geom couldn’t save Wooyeon, but he made sure his misery never touched Yoonseo. The love these 3 share hurts as much as any other love story. When Geom disappeared, Yoonseo and Wooyeon were left wrecked. They supported each other because they had no one else to grieve with, and in that grief they decided to marry. Yes, Yoonseo and Wooyeon loved each other, but I don’t think it ever developed into something truly ‘romantic’. When she finally met Geom again and jumped to hug him was so devastating; you can visibly see how long she waited to meet him, and how Geom relaxed in her embrace like he found momentary peace. Wooyeon only ever loved Geom; he was crumbling in his memories, revelling in what was left of them. Something that stuck with me was how they refused to look away from the other’s misery. They did not hide at the thought of the other’s pain just because they loved them. I am talking about the part where Wooyeon burned the image of the hell Geom was going through because that was a part of Geom that can never be erased, and how Yoonseo ‘let them (Geom and Wooyeon) walk to their death’ knowing they might not return, but promised to not look away. I am happy Yoonseo found someone who she could be happy with. She deserved her happy ending just as much as Geom and Wooyeon.

I can keep talking about how devastating the story was. I can’t stop thinking about how the ending reflects how victims never truly get justice. Chanyong (the president) only got 5 years in jail; the prosecutor goes abroad and loses his mind, consumed by his obsession. The other thug dude did die, etc., but that could never make up for the torment Geom suffered for 8 years. It disgusts me to see these disgusting men still be infatuated with Geom and thinking they have some kind of right over him. They tried to crush Geom yet lusted after his resilience. Such a revolting nature of men to own everything that resists and struggles to survive. It’s also painful how quietly every single system failed Geom. Be it police, healthcare, law officers, thugs or even regular civilians. No matter where he went, he was just a ‘cheap whore’. Everyone he killed had their deaths coming.

I wanted Rieder to suffer so much, but I couldn’t decide what ending would actually make him ‘suffer’. Rieder is a husk of a man, plagued by eternal boredom, which is why he chases hedonistic pleasures. He is a crazy ‘artist’ who loves making ‘art’ out of Geom, someone who basks in Geom’s quiet strength because he finds it amusing. Geom and Reider are foils of each other. Survivors of the same form of abuse and relentless agony. Yet, Reider becomes an abuser himself. He is the one who breaks Geom. He is like the devil, ‘beautiful’ yet cruel. He takes advantage of Geom’s vulnerability and makes him completely dependent on him, even though he is the one who kept him trapped in the hell of his own making. Perhaps it was because he saw himself in Geom, which is why he found him so amusing. Nevertheless, Geom knew that Reider was a monster, yet couldn’t help being drawn to him, so much so that he adopted his mannerisms. Reider rendered him helpless and treated him ‘gently’ when he was at his lowest so that he couldn’t help but be dependent on him. It has also occurred to me that perhaps Geom also saw bits and pieces of Wooyeon in him, which is why he let his guard down around him a little. A twisted dependence; that is what they were to each other. It also feels like no other ending would actually get a reaction from Reider. Prison? I think he’d scoff at such an idea. Death? I do not think he cares enough about that. Perhaps his declining vision is his karma, and the hinted ending is his punishment.

In all this misery, it is endearing Geom did find people who cared for him in their own way and stayed loyal to him till the end: Hong, Joongeon, and the 2 others. At least they also got to flip their life over.

Geom and Wooyeon deserve all the happiness in the world. This is truly a haunting tale about reclaiming your own life. This is perhaps the only story that will have my stomach in knots if I ever try to reread it again. Do read this manhwa at your own risk it has incredibly dark themes that are hard to stomach.

Till we meet again, my fighters Geom and Wooyeon <3

I adore Seunghyun & Chaejun so much, saw someone say that they're so 'casually in love' and I couldn't agree more. They make space for each other in their life so 'casually' that it feels like loving each other comes to them as easily as breathing. Their love is so ordinary yet extraordinary; I can't get enough of them. They are both so obviously obsessed with each other that they will probably never be able to go back to being by themself, but honestly, that's okay because they love to watch the other thrive, and it's all mutual. They accept each other despite their flaws, and it's so refreshing to see how well they communicate.

Their childhood (past) really got to me. I can't stop thinking about how Seunghyun and Yeseung's parents failed BOTH of them so miserably. I adore Yeseung so much. Poor baby was also just a child back then, the fact that he registered that at a very young age that if he worked hard enough he'd brother would at least be free to do whatever his heart desires. Yeseung truly does love his baby brother, might seem a bit overbearing and much like tough love at first, but you can really see how much he actually cares about Seunghyun as the story progresses. He observes what Seunghyun loves, gives him as much time as he can even though he's swamped and suffocated himself. He really did want Seunghyun to pursue his happiness, he'd give anything to make sure his brother got the future he wanted even if it meant he'd have to use himself for it. Seunghyun's 'breakdown?' probably had him second guessing everything he ever did, he was so devastated by his brother's crashout that he went away to the military to give him space
:( Seunghyun and Yeseung's drifting apart makes me so sad because they both needed eachother so much at that point of their lives.

Seunghyun loved his brother so much that he looked up to him as his role-model. So much so that his self-worth was forever tied to the words Yeseung said that night to divert his parents from forcing their expectations from Seunghyun. Their parents are HORRIBLE. Not only where they so emotionally draining for the brothers, their love comes with a cost. They cared more about their goal of opening of their school than any of their sons. They used the eldest as an advertisement for how great they are and left the younger one to wallow in inferiority complex because having a 'smart' kid was enough for their reputation. The fact that Seunghyun got into taekwondo in the first place because his mother said he looks cool while doing it (all because she couldn't spare time for her son too btw) and then when he finally found something he wanted to do that he was great at they snatched it back right away. It's already hard enough when they act like he almost doesn't exist but the fact that they would also treat him like some bothersome is crazy to me. To feel like you are invisible in the one place that you are supposed to find comfort is so sad (especially when you are a child). I felt a pang in my heart when the brothers both opened up. They deserve to know that they have someone cheering for them, supporting each of their steps even if it's silently. Oh the part where Seunghyun cries and says something along the lines of 'You were also just a child back then' really had me devastated. They both matured way before kids their age should and that is truly sad.

Oh my baby Chaejun, he was such a tiny little bunny cutie <3 Even though he was TINY back then he still had that foul mouth on him. His abandonment issues are etched so deep in him, that too from such a young age :(( The part were he used to draw houses and furniture for his family dreaming about when they'd be back together :( AND HE'D WAIT FOR CARS (VROOM VROOM) BECAUSE HIS MOTHER SAID SHE'S GONNA COME BACKKK- He got so attached to Seunghyun even though he'd act like he didn't give a damn. The staff room incident was so hard on him, not just physically, but also because he was so severely scared of being abandoned. Watching a tiny Chaejun clinging onto Seunghyun's taekwondo uniform in a small, musty room, waiting to be saved but no one came to get him out until it was almost too late :( Also the fact that Seunghyun DID go to find him but he was told off :( They were just kids :(((((

I love how, when they grew up you can see tidbits of their younger selves. The fact that Chaejun studies furniture design is because he always wanted to make a home where he lives his loved ones and his 'hyung'. Chaejun making the bed for Seunghyun is such a full circle moment too. They are still obsessed with each other and will be with each other 'forever' as they promised as children. It's almost like they knew they'd end up together once they grew up.

I love how they prioritise each other so much; they have their fights like any other couple, but once they think things through, they come to a solution together. I love how they take care of each other, how Chaejun makes sure Seunghyun knows his self-worth, and how Seunghyun always reassures Chaejun that he's never leave his side because he's just THAT obsessed. Both of them are freaks, best of all they are 2 freaks who are freakier TOGETHER. They are each other's home, safe haven, comfort and everything. I adore them so, so much.

I also love Chaejun's uncle. I can't help but notice how both him and Yeseung play similar roles in Chaejun and Seunghyun's lives (respectively). Both primary caregivers/gaurdians other than the parents, love Chaejun and Seunghyun and are very overprotective of them. (IHOPETHEYHAVEASIDESTORYTOGETHERITWOULDBESODELICIOUS)

[I know a lot of people are unsatisfied because Seunghyun doesn't resolve his issues with his parents, but perhaps that is normal. Not everyone can fix a fractured relationship with their parents; it's especially harder when the parents are not actually explosively abusive or horrible. It all lies in the nuances, and his parents don't feel like people who'd think they were at fault anyways. They'll probably hold on to the notion that THEY were correct all along anyways :(]

Oh Ian the man you are ლ(´ڡ`ლ)

Holy FUCK

I'm hard



(I don't have a dick)

Okay- Leaving my thoughts here after reading the novel because, phew that was ALOT.


Yeon-oh and Gi-hyeon are so obsessed with each other; it’s actually crazy. You rarely see couples THIS fiercely co-dependent (even in bl). They practically live and breathe one another. Perhaps that is why their entire misunderstanding literally feels like it’s choking you out when you’re reading the novel. All of their miscommunication stems from the fact that both are severely traumatized, but neither knows about all the things the other person went through. They are so obscenely obsessed with each other that they refuse to tell the other about their deepest hurt.


From the moment Gi-hyeon realized that he loves Yeon-oh, he swallowed his own love as if he’s already accepted defeat. He let his love for Yeon-oh fester and rot his heart out, so much so it started suffocating him. He believed that Yeon-oh could never love him so religiously that he never even considered it an option to begin with. I guess to some extent you could say it wasn’t really entirely his fault for having such thoughts since Yeon-oh did have his ‘prejudices’ against beta (men). From his point of view, he never explained why he had such vehement hatred towards them, so he was completely unaware of Yeon-oh’s past traumas. They were also never intimately involved in the 7 years they were in a supposed ‘relationship’, the fact that Yeon-oh possesses a foul mouth and says whatever doesn’t really help their case either. Even so, to dismiss all that Yeon-oh does for him as mere platonic affection is a bit much because no one does all that for a ‘bestfriend’. Gi-hyeon was so blinded by his own sacrifices that he thought his love was poison to Yeon-oh, and perhaps himself too. Although Yeon-oh was always there by his side, refusing to leave all he did was endure alone, suffer in silence, and kill himself over and over again.

Similarly, Yeon-oh had always loved Gi-hyeon but his trauma worked as a barrier separating him and Gi-hyeon. He is honestly crazier for Gi-hyeon than Gi-hyeon is for him. If it were upto him he’d literally sew himself onto Gi-hyeon and fuse together with him like some deep-sea angler fish. He literally goes crazy if he’s separated from Gi-hyeon even if it’s for mere moments. He’s so obsessively in love with him that he’d bring him the moon if that’s what Gi-hyeon asked for. To think he’s been lusting for Gi-hyeon ever since they’ve been in high school but thought his feelings for Gi-hyeon were ‘filthy’. What’s crazy to me is that he refused to realise his feelings for Gi-hyeon were love because he strongly believed that his love for Gi-hyeon was far more profound and pure than the feeling of ‘love’. He acts as if Gi-hyeon is his lifeline, his breath, his soul, and his entire world. He wanted to Gi-hyeon something grander than his low ‘love’ but by doing so he deprived him of what he wanted, no, needed the most.

Both of them are so desperately in love that they are drowning in their own grievances to realise the other’s pain. Both love each other to self-deprecation; they believe their love is a sin to the other, so they suffocate each other to no end. Yet, even after all that, they cannot stray from one another; they are eternally bound together because erasing the other would mean erasing themself. Their entanglement defies logic. No matter how far Gi-hyeon runs away from Yeon-oh, Yeon-oh will always find him, and Gi-hyeon will ALWAYS give in. They are so messy, but it’s hard to look away, just like a train wreck. Half the time, you are tearing away at your own hair because of how frustrating they are, because it is so SO obvious how much they crave each other, but their misunderstandings keep building up, and Gi-hyeon keeps backing away, but at the same time you can’t really put the book down.

All the yapping aside; in case you want to read the novel: https://www.novelupdates.com/series/salt-society/ (Login to novel updates to read)

hey lovelies does anyone know the password to read 'salt society' novel chapters past 85 (on novelupdates/moonflorverse)

can someone share the link to the novel </3