beta
Okay so this should be labelled as nsfw cause what do you mean I wanna sob as I'm sitting in office OH MY GOODNESS
What.
Nsfw is the abbreviation for 'Not safe for work' people assume that it only means things that are inappropriate to read in public which it largely is but it's not necessarily only that
I mean, I guess it's nice that so many people haven't experienced what "harmful coping mechanisms" are. And I don't wish it on anyone either of course, but like, it's is very VERY normal to think about your previous coping mechanism when you're in a high stress situation. And it's never an ACTIVE thinking, it gets triggered. And and there are a ton of harmful coping mechanisms, cheating is one, so is self harm, suicidal ideation, etc. Your brain is USED to that coping strategy even when you are ACTIVELY trying to recover from it. As someone who struggles with the same thing- different coping mechanism though, I'm 27 and I still get surprised by how casually it slips into my normal thoughts, even before I consciously realise that I'm stressed or overstimulated.
If he acts on it I'll definitely think he's a piece of shit, buuuut him thinking about it and then having a immediate surprise reaction is proof enough that this wasn't a conscious thought. It kinda sucks how it catches you by surprise tbh, buuut we cope.
I think another angle that is being overlooked is that, imo, this reads as his coping mechanism/stress reaction is "casual sex", not cheating. Obviously casual hookups would be cheating now that he's in a dedicated relationship which is why he immediately rejects the thought. I didn't read this and instantly think he's a serial cheater, just that's its something left over from when he wasn't in a relationship, that he instantly recognizes isn't appropriate anymore.
Yesss 100% yes