Why is everyone overreacting, it's not that serious. It's just an intrusive thought which he immediately regretted. It is very realistic, people have terrible thoughts or feelings, things you can't control. What matters are your actions, whether you materialize those thoughts or if you just ignore them bc at the end of the day, they're just that, thoughts that are not hurting no one because they're in your head
People often confuse intrusive thoughts with impulsive thinking. Intrusive thoughts are when you are suddenly thinking the worst things. Then you immediately are disgusted and uncomfortable by that sudden thought. It can mess you up for awhile as you try to understand why the hell you thought that. When simply it’s something you don’t have control over especially when you are in your lowest place.
Oh my god this was so good until Hawaii happened. What the fuck...I'm just speechless at how tasteless it got after -that- scene. I mean their interactions were already violent, but those last chapters...I just felt so disgusted and so sorry for the mc, it makes me sick how he just accepts that. I guess it's interesting and a great story if I think of it as a psychological horror bl because the emotions it made me feel are just disgust and pity








I've been reading this non stop and let me tell you this is one of the best stories I've seen, it's soooo silly but well written, the storytelling it's so beautiful. Man I want moreeee