Ssr kun just seems to be very chill overall lol MC might need someone who can let him rest like that
What about Minamoto? (Psychic)
Oh I was a Minamoto team as well (and still is I guess) for similar reason. However, SSR-kun seems to be bolder than Minamoto, which makes their dynamic fits my very much personal taste more lol it's really just that.
I think if SSR-kun's sharp and unbothered enough, he'd be able to get around MC without alerting MC's yaoi-radar. Like "oh it's the weird guy again", MC is only thinking about using him to distract Hatano which make him pay less attention to SSR, but it'll be funny if his plan backfired and SSR become interested in him instead (cliche, I know). Of course, all of this is still in my head haha
I'm seeing the psychological aspect of mindbreak porn being dissected, presented, built little by little this story is so fucking amazing for that. I cannot find a lot of media not to mention manhwa which can (and dare) to do this so rawly, yet this manhwa not only nailed the art but also the story hello? 10 stars
When will we get to that? Honestly, I don't like ml smug face at all, but I love mind break TT I need a little hope.
The events leading up to that began in early 20ish, the "training arc" (basically) comes after it, then we get to the mindbreak part on the latest chapters. I haven't read the novel either so Idk how far they'll go with it, but up until this point, our Jiwook has changed drastically, details by details, due to the shits Juyeon put him through
Ok, a few more chapters and I'm getting to 20s. Thank you.
Ch. 64 thought he said he gonna leave him to his own device after using him for the last time lmao. If he was going to kill him theres no need to say that before
It feels like the narrative found a need to justify the protagonists' killing spree. The dark knight CEO, for example, "Oh no he is a mass murderer for stress relieve & happen to need it to level up but no worries! He only kills rapists and other bad guys XD". Like okay but they could've done it more elegantly, or even test the moral against other characters who cannot justify murder even if those ppl "deserve" it. The MC have done this several time as well it's just, too obvious and funny lol.
Human horror is worse than ghost horror as always. I was actually scared when we get to "the killer was still in the house!" part, the tension was well built. The second time as well, when the killer came to MC's house and found Akane, even just showing her feet gave me chill. Ig it's partly because I am a scaredy cat lol, but anyway, visual wise everything was great!
About the story, since it is a short series, I can accept the lack of information about Akane-chan as part of the charm. A girl whom MC know nothing beyond her name, guided him through those shits, left and disappeared without footnote. I think the unusual elements (peeping boy, kidnapped girl, solving murder) is the most important part of the story. Anything else matters little, so the story managed to remain complete even with only 12 chapters.
I, too, am someone with fear-avoidant attachment style. Jun's character frustates me so fucking much, I can pick up everytime he starts blaming himself & feel self-conscious about everything, then push away the people around him including his own boyfriend. Personally, it always feels like my problems aren't something other people should bother themselves with. The notion of someone other than myself caring about my problem, listening & get invested to them just doesn't make sense. As I read this story, I realized how ridiculous it's all from 3rd person pov. Sharing sorrows and seeking comfort is natural. Humans, despite their infamous selfish nature, is also a foolishly caring creature.
I empathize with what you mean. It would be a lie to say that I don't think like that anymore like Jun. It did get better after I had finally met the right people (people who actively listen and care for what you feel - with no ulterior motive).
I sometimes hesitate to talk about myself, mostly the bad things and think "I'm sure they're busy, so I shouldn't bother them. Maybe later." and that later never comes. Sure, trauma dumping is never healthy, since it literally indicates that the person has bottled those up for a long time and doesn't get the necessary caring responses from others. Therapy helped me a lot, which was funny to see Jun saying that he quit Therapy by keeping himself busy and ignoring it. Me too bro, me too. ANYONE READING THIS that is absolutely UNHEALTHY! It feels safe to do so, but in the long run that is absolutely dangerous.
So to summarize:
Talk, write or sing I don't care but get those feelings out there. Go to therapy or at least teach yourself some anxiety reducing methods like the 3-3-3 rule. Oh, and staying shut in your room could make you hate it sooner or later. Use it as a shelter, not a tree to take root in.
And finally something that I am still struggling with, but proudly less.
(๑•ㅂ•)و✧
"Everything might feel overwhelming and too much, but know that it feels amazing to at least breathe when it is less."
Thank you so much for leaving this here! I see that many other people (unfortunately) relate to Jun's as well as our problem...
Glad to hear that you are improving well, I know it took effort & much bravery to do so cause in a way, we are venturing into what we percieve as "dangerous & unstable" field that is connection. Acknowledging the problem is a first step, so I hope more people will get better as well, maybe through reading the series or even our conversations. I, too, will try to get better!!! (๑•ㅂ•)و✧
(Also thank you for mentioning the thing about shutting in in room, it is something I personally guilty of, hehe I feel called out)
Yes, definitely well said<3
I truly believe that if there is a will, there is always a way. Being afraid, unsure or disheartened to take on that other hard journey in ones life is sadly part of it.
So even before and now that journey starts I am sending to you and anyone else reading our lovely conversation my utmost respect to how far you all have come and strength to keep on going. ヾ(╹◡╹)ﾉ~
THEY TOOK MY BEAUTIFUL LONG WHITE HAIR GLASSES BUTLER BEAUTY AND THREW IN SOME MEPHISTOPHELES DUMMY WHO ARE YOU WHERES MY ALBERTO WAAAAHH
Oh well, oh well, we better have costume play on the regular list, Mephisto
SO IT WAS ALL DREAM? OH GODDD
I had thought side. 18 was real and that side. 19 is just some, well, flashbacks or something. I was already convinced that my yaoi is having a bittersweet borderline tragic end ffs which is sad but fucking possible considering the atmosphere this series have T^T... that is one scary and vivid dream indeed. Though it's been shown what it'd possibly be like after Sayan's death, I'm still thankful that it seems they would let us have the usual "happily ever after" thing. Narrative yadda yadda, Idc, I really just want to see them loving... sob...