I'm sure you understand, but not everyone who reads BL is a part of the toxic culture around it. I can only try to answer your questions from a personal stand point, because in all honesty I don't understand the fetishes either.
When I was younger, it was a release for me, especially as I was questioning my own identity. It was really nice to be ...... 2 reply
I'm a mix between nonbinary, androgynous and genderfluid. I might even be a third gender. I'm still working things out. However I know that I'm pansexual and asexual. It's super confusing. 2 reply
I'm most definetly an S when it comes to guys. I don't like being dominated in any way, but I do like the idea of dominating. Plus, men look so hot when they cry! reply