LITMUS test for yaoi writing: would it hold up as a heterosexual love story? I genuinely think the ml would get much more hate and general criticism if he made the same choices but with a woman as the mc/love interest instead. His cowardice is cruel even if unintentionally. Mc never had the peace of mind of knowing he was wanted or loved like the ml did. Bro didn’t grovel nearly enough to make up for that fact.
i dont think itd hold up if it was a heterosexual story cus in my opinion, the ml's dad didnt like the mc other than the mc being average and not up to the dad's standards but also mainly because of homophobia and heteronormativity. i'd like to think it that way since it brings more depth to what was given to us and it makes more sense as it is boy love, if it was straight, i dont think the story would be that complicated and they wouldn't have kept their feelings from eachother in the first place since straight is the "norm"
This is sweet, somewhat realistic. I feel like if it were any longer it would’ve dragged on without much substance. I usually really like pushy semes but tbh ml was a bit too inconsiderate for my taste. Thank god we got to see him crying and begging lol
I say it’s realistic in the way that the seme is emotionally stunted and acts frustratingly naive and selfish. It makes sense for his character and it could easily occur IRL. People are complex and flawed and he is certainly indicative of that. I only wish mc wasn’t so immediately forgiving. Maybe it’s supposed to show how his abrasive and rowdy nature with others is in direct contrast to how he acts with the one he truly loves but it feels unnatural. Love changes you but this feels.. dimming.









I enjoyed this as a short read about an interesting dynamic and situation without getting too deep and tbh not much of a resolution besides kei opening up his heart to love but no further development conveyed about his isolating tendencies. Their relationship progression was rather abrupt but not unbelievable imo. I do genuinely wonder if Kei has some sort of developmental or mental delay/disorder because of how much he’s struggled to function and socialize even before losing his parents/grandmother. Even the way he’s processed their deaths and his seemingly emotional disconnect sways me to believe so. I understand why other readers would dislike his character for this reason as he can come off as infantilized, especially without ample exploration of his character depth. While I am higher functioning and Kei’s background and internal dialogue was barely even touched upon, the small glimpse into his world that we do get felt very autistically relatable lol.