HanSooyoungswife

yeah lmao has sb asking if there was rape and some mf said “no” like??

WHAT?? the mc was literally saying ‘no’ and ‘stop’ throughout the WHOLE SCENE wdym THAT ISNT RAPE??

Unfortunately in my many many years of consuming pornography of all sorts, and reading up on this, there does appear to be a really gross cultural phenomenon that does not translate well into western media. I mean, I think it's horrible to begin with, but I can't change an entire cultural issue as a lone individual, especially one not of Asian descent.
In a lot of east asian cultures, dudes get off on their partners saying "no" and "stop" instead of "yes" and "please". It's been happening in media for DECADES. Typically women will be using a baby voice saying these things in pornography that they do not really mean. Because guys get off on pretending their partners don't actually want it. They get off on rape.
It has gotten so bad to the point of pretty much all manga/manhwa/manhua depicting sex scenes exactly how it is on film in their countries. I rarely see anyone using their brains and thinking about how poorly this translates into western culture. Probably because they think we like that ish too. I don't think I've seen a single pornographic film made by east asians were the partner acting as the bottom didn't call out "no" and "stop" when in contrast they visibly appeared and sounded to be enjoying what was happening.
Once you've been reading and consuming porn and erotica from east asia for a decade, it's blatantly clear.
They could easily swap out the gross "no"s for" yes"s, but they always make the choice to do a direct translation. I think it's so engrained into the culture that they think everyone gets off on rape culture, so they don't even know the majority of the world prefers "yes".
It's sickening, but it's the reality there.
I have been noticing for years now how confusing this is for new readers of translations of etotic east asian media. Unfortunately, this is why. The characters actually mean "yes", but it's so engrained into artist's heads to type out "no" because that is actually what these characters would say there. But 9/10 times they say it but aren't meaning it. They think that's just what you say when you're having good sex. They think men think it's sexy to pretend you don't actually want it. It's so unbelievably wack.
Once you become older and more versed it is easy to tell the difference between actual SA being depicted, and whatever the hell weirdo cultural thing this shit is. It still makes me uneasy and turns my stomach a bit every time upon the first read, but this is just how is is in almost every east asian piece of 18+ media.
What makes it even more confusing is there is an abundance of actual assault that happens in manga/manhwa/manhua. Especially in BL for some reason. Anyway, that's why these characters are saying "no". It really should be translated as "yes" for us. But everyone down to the translators think everyone everywhere secretly fetishes rape culture. We do not. If they had people from other cultures proofread stuff before publishing it a lot of this could be avoided. I am hoping with a lot of these more puritanical readers coming into adulthood and now complaining, the culture will finally change.
But for me, it's been this way for a while. What's crazy is I am positive it didn't used to be like this with what I recall reading as a kid. I think it's only been a thing that's been normalized in the past fifteen years. I also think it typically doesn't happen in bara at all. The implications of that are so wack.

for reference, I've been reading pornographic stories in all of their forms for two decades. twenty years. literally was molded by this shit. so unfortunately I'm not talking out of my ass. You'll start noticing this now everytime you consume east asian produced 18+ material. Like I said, give it a decade and you will be borderline desensitized to it. I hate it. What I hate even more though is the fact that grown women now purposefully try to sound like children in all erotic east asian media. And it's starting to translate into all other language translations. Actually it's been happening for about a decade now. But this is a seperate yet equally as fucked issue as rape culture being normalized there.

Yeah, I know. The bad thing is sometimes I also don’t register a scene is rape because it’s been so normalised, it’s easy to look past. People say ‘it’s fiction it can’t effect reality’ but the normalisation of rape actually desensitises people to it, so some people nowadays might not even know that their actions are sexual assault/rape, because pornographic material acts like ‘no’ is a word that can be ignored:(

EXACTLY. the scenes in this story are particularly difficult to decipher too because he does appear to be in an altered state half the time and doesnt initiate the encounters. but I think he's just gooning hard going by the faces so the translation is therefore wonky(1)

(1) my above essay

I typically just mentally try to replace the words with words we would actually use to convey pleasure and then you can tell when it's obviously assault because it will look REALLY wonky. It makes me feel immensely frustrated that this is what the youngin's are reading these days because it is actively spreading normalization of rape culture worldwide. And as an offshoot puritanical ideology because it appears from face value that almost everything is assault in these stories.
The fact that we adults still have trouble deciphering if consent is happening sometimes is nuts. I honestly could very well be wrong here and when he hears that recording he might freak out and say he didn't mean any of it. And even THEN that might be a white lie because he could be embarrassed he DID like it and really felt those words in the moment. I'm gonna go bald.

lol this gets into the discussion of what is considered assault for omegas which I already said in some other comment long ago that's up for actual philosophers to debate. Yeah, there's definitely rape in well, most of this one, but I think the last two encounters (if I am recalling correctly) are... questionable? I think we don't know MC's true thoughts about any of the sexual stuff yet (if I am correctly identifying the whole no=yes cultural issue correctly here. if he really is saying no meaning no, then there's no debate obviously.)

Unfortunately I think the people always romantizing stories full of SA have been brainwashed by the afformentioned cultural phenomena. So there's definitely going to be younger readers thinking no=yes EVERY time. Which means they have fully bought into rape culture. :( I think it's fine to acknowledge that sometimes bad scenes can be sexy in your own mind, but openly commenting saying you get off to undebatable SA is wild and potentially harmful without any disclaimers or going into detail. And unfortunately I do see it all the time smh. some people should not have been taught how to read. jkjk but I do honestly think the people saying such things do not have fully developed brains yet so that can hopefully bring some comfort. because they'll (hopefully) learn. I can only imagine what 12 year old me would be commenting. I have seen some of the stuff I did back as a kid that horrified the hell out of me. (WHY DID I HAVE NUDES SAVED ON THE FAMILY COMPUTER AHHHHHHHH)

Oh deadass, my 11yro self got off to that kind of thing, I’ve developed now and realised how disgusting it is, but since I grew up exposed to sexual media from a very young age, I kinda just thought it was okay. I’m definitely not mad at the young people who grew up being taught by media that rape is okay, because it’s not their fault, they are just uneducated.

Also, what happened in the last two encounters? I couldn’t make it past the first sex scene without genuinely feeling nauseous, so I’ve dropped it.

I also think he is genuinely saying no, since we saw his thoughts and he was clearly uncomfortable and unhappy with the situation. Though, even if he didn’t fully mean it, and just said ‘no’ because he was unsure, it would still be rape. Unless you’re in a relationship with a pre established safe word, no means no and if someone says no, you stop. It’s kinda like how rapist might say ‘but your body is saying something completely different’ when someone says ‘no’, Ykwim?

Apologies, I dropped the book after the first sex scene because it was just so uncomfortable, so I have no idea what about a recording and such. Was he recorded when having sex and he was saying ‘yes’ and stuff? If so, absolute bullshit unless he was intoxicated, if you say yes you can’t claim AFTER the sex that you didn’t mean it. During? Absolutely, after? NO?? you can 100% say ‘no’ and not mean it, (the partner should still listen none the less) but you cannot say ‘yes’ and not mean it. (You could, but why on earth would you??)

I get it,thanks for sharing all this info.

Ang OA niyo,
Gusto niyo din nmn ang scene,
Kung hnd gusto don't read ganon lng kadali oky.
Dami pang dada. OA

Thank you for your service!! It's so annoying to start a comic that everyone glazed in the comments only to find out there is rape or SA.

I agree it feels so uncomfortable.Did they fix it in the next coming upcoming chapters???

NO. THEY DIDNT