I’m all for dark romance because my taste are toxic af but I understand that there must be balance so I usually have a fluffy romance waiting as after care for my own mind. That being said I’m not judging the author if they’re in their dark romance era but they should have just started a completely new work instead of ruining my fluffy palette cleanser that was clearly already finished to cater to their new kink.
Why won’t he tell her? Because he knows her well enough by now to understand she would misinterpret his sincere feelings as either pity or even convenience considering he never showed signs of wanting to seriously be tied down by marriage before and now that he has too, a dying woman with only a year left to live appears before him. I can only imagine the chaos of emotions she’d feel knowing his situation and if she discovered he read her bucket list. Worse case scenario the sense of betrayal would make her quit her job and further distance herself from him by hiding out deep in the countryside or asking to be transferred overseas before he ever got the chance to explain and convince her of his true intentions.