How does it feel?

Hey everyone! So, I'm in the middle of writing a story and I need some references. I have some questions for all of you, and please do share your answers with me, it can be long, it can be short! I'd love to read it! So, here we go:
1. How does it feel when someone who is very close to you die? (Can be your friends, family, relatives, etc)
2. How does it feel when someone you love turns out to be someone so heartless? (In this case, turns out to be a murderer or willing to kill people. Can be lovers, friends, family, relatives, etc)
3. How does it feel when you fell in love? (with a real person lol. Idk how it feels like, help)
4. Last one, what will your reaction be if your friend shows up in your stepdoor, covered in blood?
Thanks for taking your time on reading this! (づ￣ ³￣)づ