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umm so i messed up
okay so like a majority of you out there i like to read yaoi, and more specifically smut, for the romance. like yes it’s hot but at core i’m not really getting horny reading it, more like i enjoy the sex in a mostly platonic way. i’m not sure if that makes sense, but the main take away is this — as much as i enjoy yaoi and smutty scene, im doing so in a way that doesn’t make me aroused.
until one day i made the mistake of getting myself off to yaoi.... and screwed up. it wasn’t like a romance story or anything, it was hentai that i somehow stumbled upon and got me all hot and bothered. but now when i read yaoi it makes me feel weird like i’m still not really horny and i’m still interested in the romance but i do feel like a slight bit of arousal and i hate it bc i just want to go back to aesthetically liking the smut.
Well, it isn't easy to go back though. I mean. It's like some kind of pandora's box that once you open you can never close it. But it gets better though when you get used to it. Erotic and arousing things are still beautiful things too. 2 reply
