BL/Yaoi discourse ig

I’ve seen like 10 vids abt BL back to back and lately there have been more vids on that so I kinda wanna talk about fetishization in the BL space and have some questions.

So I’ve noticed a pattern. Lately, I’ve noticed more and more white queer especially white mlm (male luv male) speak out against it. They say that BL is harmful and that it normalizes fetishization towards gay/queer men. That women who read BL/identify as a Fujoshi are all weird and gross. ‘Straight Women who read hardcore smut constantly are 100% fetishizers.’

↳To that a certain degree I do agree that there is truth that with the prominence of BL I’m sure there has been a rise of fetishization which should be addressed and called out. But I also think that a lot of those points are kinda wrong. Women reading smut isn’t inherently wrong at all, it’s when they start to mix fiction into reality and start asking queer men uncomfortable questions regarding their sex life and sexuality unprovoked/out of nowhere. Or when they start pushing heteronormative stereotypes onto queer men. And to that I say we call those actions out bc frankly they’re weird and unnecessary but let’s not start hating on all women esp the ones who have done nothing but just read.

I also don’t think it’s that deep that some women refer to themselves as fujoshi. Just bc some fujoshis were known to be fetishizers doesn’t mean that every single one of them are as well. That’s just generalization. People love to use and create terms to describe themselves and their hobbies. “Otakus” “fudanshis” “fujoshis” “___ Stan’s” etc. imo, an issue is when we take a JP term and try to change the meaning to fit it western standards, that’s a bit odd to me.

now this might point might ruffle some feathers and so I’ll try to word this as nicely as I can:
BL is queer Asian media, 98% of the characters are Asian. So wouldn’t the fetishizers consuming BL target and stereotype queer Asian men??
I’m not saying that white queers haven’t faced fetishization bc of BL, I’m sure that they have and it sucks. But considering which race is used most in Bl’s, would they not be the first to get fetishized heavily?? With the rise of discourse about Bl, I’ve only ever seen white queers preach on this topic but I’ve never seen queer asian men talk on it. The ones that do speak up on it are kinda nonchalant abt it. I have a lot of Asian friends that are also queer and dont really seem to care about the Bl discourse as passionately as their white counterparts, so if anyone wants try and explain this phenomenon to me, I’d appreciate it greatly