possessiveness and jealousy of a top in bl used as a lazy plot boost

i've been running into this trope ALOT lately, where a top acts fucking immature and gets extremely jealous to the point he takes it out on the bottom with ''angry sex'' when it's js rape smh. there's a limit to how jealous and possessive a person can get, esp an ADULT. when it gets too much it's not hot you just need a therapist. oh and what i meant as ''a lazy plot boost'' is when they realize they like a person js cuz they feel jealous of another person getting close to them....it's just stupid bc how tf can you base your feelings off of jealousy? u might just be obsessive with abandonment issues smh, it's totally normal to feel jealous and possessive towards your partner but basing your whole love off of that? nah...if you really love them you'd trust them and respect them as a person.
and also why is it always the top getting all mad, obsessive and selfish? why, can't a bottom act like that as well? he's just supposed to stay indifferent all the time?? i've heard so many tops say ''i just want to lock you up'' ''you're mine and only mine'' ''get away from that guy, don't talk to him'' wayyy more than bottoms
it's becoming a VERY frustrating trope these days, only one i've read that was healthy enough to not resort to these cheap tricks was our sunny days tbh