WHY NO ONE WANTS TO BE FRIENDS FIRST?

I am a young adult person who is bi, I hv never dated before as I come from a pretty orthodox family. I do want to be in love, or be in a relationship with, ig women cus like idk men aren't really interesting these days. But only issue is I am in this lgbt server but every single woman that I talk to just want one thing, a relationship. Now look, I do too but not like that. I am the type of person who would like to get to know them first, start off as friends but no one is interested. I don't mean the the I'm not serious let's flirt or sext kinda friend. I want to fall in love slowly or just have a genuine connection. I have many times told this to people straight up right after meeting them but STILL they ask me stuff like do u want engage in intimate relations, or they ask me send pics. One of the issue with me is I'm a really insecure person, my insecurity stems from not being conventionally attractive. So tell me am I wrong here, is it just my insecurity speaking because I just don't understand why people (I mean any of them) not interested in being friends first. And ONLINE DATING is a huge cliff, u don't really know if ur parashute is working or not but the view is def beautiful, won't u wanna know if it works first tho? Sorry for the long rant.