I keep hyping up to meet with my online friends but shut them down once they're near my area

I need thoughts on my situation, I've had severe issues with how I looked like and body dysmorphia since I was young. I love my online friends and want to meet them so badly but once they ask if I can hang out when they're near my area (They didn't go so far just for me, just for something else and happen to be near me) I get this overwhelming sense of feeling like they would think I'm ugly compared to pictures they've seen. I don't use heavy filters or anything that doesn't look like me and I'm excited/happy to meet them irl but I just can't bring myself to meet them. I'm trying to work on it but I just hope they won't be disappointed in me when I can finally tell them the truth (Not looking for sympathy or compliments, I'm well aware it's a me problem and just wanted to look for other people's thoughts)