I'm a huge fan of allegories, so reading the mc & ml's internal issues as an allegory for internalized homophobia was fun. Both experience this, but both treat the issue differently.
Mc saying stuff like how he was in relationships with women before but he always felt unfulfilled, saying "it sounded like some weird fetish" (how a lot of people used to think about homosexuality in the past), thinking that just because one sub (queer person) enjoyed getting hit, then that means all subs (queer people) must be masochists or perverts, generalizing Dynamics (homosexuality) as a 'fetish' rather than just being how people are built all because of how the environment he was raised in treated the issue.
Mc takes a more Avoidant approach to the issue, telling other people he's a Normal type, and not even really taking his meds because that would mean acknowledging the truth. "I was normal. I liked being in normal relationships." (Ch3) can be read as a gay man dating exclusively women to delude himself into feeling like a straight man just to avoid that part of himself.
Ml knowing more about Dynamics, acknowledging that he does have that Dynamic, and helping the mc to acknowledge that part of himself too.
But Ml still takes a self-loathing approach to the issue. He's also affected by how society views doms, but he doesn't avoid acknowledging himself as one. So, while he'll still help others to accept themselves, he still hates himself, the same way some homophobes like to villainize homosexuality and treat it like some disgusting, immoral existence. He's internalized that mindset of being treated like a villain, and it's led him to loathe himself.
So overall, the allegory is like this: Mc's internalized homophobia stretches Outwards, leading him to judging others (avoiding including himself under the lgbt umbrella), While Ml's internalized homophobia sinks Inwards, leading him to judge himself (while still supporting others under the lgbt umbrella).
I'm a huge fan of allegories, so reading the mc & ml's internal issues as an allegory for internalized homophobia was fun. Both experience this, but both treat the issue differently.
Mc saying stuff like how he was in relationships with women before but he always felt unfulfilled, saying "it sounded like some weird fetish" (how a lot of people used to think about homosexuality in the past), thinking that just because one sub (queer person) enjoyed getting hit, then that means all subs (queer people) must be masochists or perverts, generalizing Dynamics (homosexuality) as a 'fetish' rather than just being how people are built all because of how the environment he was raised in treated the issue.
Mc takes a more Avoidant approach to the issue, telling other people he's a Normal type, and not even really taking his meds because that would mean acknowledging the truth. "I was normal. I liked being in normal relationships." (Ch3) can be read as a gay man dating exclusively women to delude himself into feeling like a straight man just to avoid that part of himself.
Ml knowing more about Dynamics, acknowledging that he does have that Dynamic, and helping the mc to acknowledge that part of himself too.
But Ml still takes a self-loathing approach to the issue. He's also affected by how society views doms, but he doesn't avoid acknowledging himself as one. So, while he'll still help others to accept themselves, he still hates himself, the same way some homophobes like to villainize homosexuality and treat it like some disgusting, immoral existence. He's internalized that mindset of being treated like a villain, and it's led him to loathe himself.
So overall, the allegory is like this:
Mc's internalized homophobia stretches Outwards, leading him to judging others (avoiding including himself under the lgbt umbrella),
While Ml's internalized homophobia sinks Inwards, leading him to judge himself (while still supporting others under the lgbt umbrella).
I just like allegories ^-^