Had a boyfriend who was abusive if I didn’t listen to him an verbally got to my mind thinking I couldn’t live without him an his love as no one could ever love me as he did an at times It felt like it with family members. Last time I was with him.. he wrapped his arms around me not letting me get away while he had his way when I begged him to stop an when my voice started to get a bit louder he started to choke me an pulled his pocket knife out threatened if I wake my parents up next room he’d knife anyone who came through my door he was 6ft an could even take my father down cause he was violent when he saw red an never seen anyone take him down on their own. That happened 3 days before Christmas an on Christmas I was so afraid to see him even though we talked on the phone an ended up telling my parents an then they had to make sure he couldn’t see me or talk to me an had to put a straining order on him with the court. He blamed me saying I didn’t love him enough and that I was a bitch an he’d get my family killed in front of me an leave me with nothing.. been through other things before that but he never went that far before an always found ways for me to blame myself an end up with him over an over. I understand where the author came from this cause not everyone get that chance to get away an permanently like there is a part you think you moved on but once their near you an treat you like they did once… you have to have a strong mind and heart to get passed it an not everyone is built that way if they are used to that life for long. If I didn’t put a straining order in an got away from him on social media or cellphone an leave to a place far from that current home for healing an mind building and getting to know new people might been dead. He wanted to cut me out from family and friends an keep me under his watch while I was a wife with kids with cameras in the house. At that time my love for him was so strong that I didn’t see it was wrong until that night 3 days before Christmas when I saw his most violent side an it gave me the thought. “ If I stay with him I was going to die.” I’m not 100% over the trauma but, these stories do tear me up an reminds me to stay away from guys like these sadly ever since been more afraid of men and hard to be alone with one without someone I already know and trust. Pretty open about it since it doesn’t trigger anything since my teenage days. Open book sort of person now.
Had a boyfriend who was abusive if I didn’t listen to him an verbally got to my mind thinking I couldn’t live without him an his love as no one could ever love me as he did an at times It felt like it with family members. Last time I was with him.. he wrapped his arms around me not letting me get away while he had his way when I begged him to stop an when my voice started to get a bit louder he started to choke me an pulled his pocket knife out threatened if I wake my parents up next room he’d knife anyone who came through my door he was 6ft an could even take my father down cause he was violent when he saw red an never seen anyone take him down on their own. That happened 3 days before Christmas an on Christmas I was so afraid to see him even though we talked on the phone an ended up telling my parents an then they had to make sure he couldn’t see me or talk to me an had to put a straining order on him with the court. He blamed me saying I didn’t love him enough and that I was a bitch an he’d get my family killed in front of me an leave me with nothing.. been through other things before that but he never went that far before an always found ways for me to blame myself an end up with him over an over. I understand where the author came from this cause not everyone get that chance to get away an permanently like there is a part you think you moved on but once their near you an treat you like they did once… you have to have a strong mind and heart to get passed it an not everyone is built that way if they are used to that life for long. If I didn’t put a straining order in an got away from him on social media or cellphone an leave to a place far from that current home for healing an mind building and getting to know new people might been dead. He wanted to cut me out from family and friends an keep me under his watch while I was a wife with kids with cameras in the house. At that time my love for him was so strong that I didn’t see it was wrong until that night 3 days before Christmas when I saw his most violent side an it gave me the thought. “ If I stay with him I was going to die.” I’m not 100% over the trauma but, these stories do tear me up an reminds me to stay away from guys like these sadly ever since been more afraid of men and hard to be alone with one without someone I already know and trust. Pretty open about it since it doesn’t trigger anything since my teenage days. Open book sort of person now.