Well said spot on. THANK YOU!
Noticed that too! Really young with no experience. These stories are just great and feel more realistic once you have lived more through ups and downs. We aren't perfect and that's okay.
which adult do you think are like that? as i know adult (i mean over 30) don't think much about how to please people. saying us teenagers just because we have our own opinions are kinda rude ya knw. do you know some teenagers are far matured than adults?
Exatcly. The OP seems young, as well
I feel like Sa-in's insecurities are so valid as a homosexual.. his archetype resonates with me so much(for non-related reasons) and I feel like most BL readers get annoyed with this type of personality but it's so so common and important.. I just wish they demonstrated better communication. This story has potential but oh well
This whole conversation is really interesting because it’s more a site-wise issue. I’m with you in the sense that emotional maturity does not *necessarily* come with age. Certainly, as you grow older you accumulate ‘lived experience’, which is something that simply comes with age. That said, ‘lived experience’ does NOT equate wisdom and emotional growth. As someone who is also in their thirties, I have met as many mature young adults as I have met emotionally immature adults. Wisdom comes from in-depth personal introspection and we can be wise at any age.
I can’t speak for the original poster’s meaning, but the comments that tend to irk me have less to do with “young people” not understanding plots (because they’re “young”), but rather when a commenter can’t empathize with two characters without finding an all-villain / all-hero (which is emotionally immature). Life is not black and white; to believe it is IS emotionally immature.
An emotionally mature individual can try to empathize with both of these men. They each come with histories, fear, insecurities, and desires. They’re human; they’re afraid to be hurt so instead they hurt. Welcome to the human condition. We miscommunicate and misunderstand, sometimes we do it willfully, sometimes we do so because we are not aware of our own internal drives. If you’re a person who is introspective - lived experience and age give you the benefit of having many more chances to find your own wisdom. You may see things with less heat and more understanding as you get older; your perspectives change. But young people can also have wisdom and that wisdom is also valid.
It’s the emotionally reactive ‘that guy is all bad’ / ‘how dare he!?!?!?!’ / ‘one person is the good guy & one is bad’ type responses that can be frustrating to read. Those comments really makes a poster appear ridiculous, as it seems they’ve taken no time to empathize and understand each character’s background and struggles. It doesn’t help that many of these stories play on very dualistic tropes of good guy vs. bad, which are literally trying to get your fired up so you’ll get hooked. Anyways, good discussion from all of you. I appreciate seeing people having real convos about how the story affected them.
I wasn't talking about maturity or wisdom. I was talking about being able to empathize with characters that are pessimistic and risk-averse. It is understandable that those who are young (or young at heart) who have never faced serious heartbreaks could be positive and hopeful about a relationship and feel that love conquers all, even if there's no practical way it could work out. But for someone who has seen and lived through heartbreaks (theirs and that of those around them) and seen relationships that started off great but disintegrated over the years where at the end of it one or both of the people involved end up bitter and hating each other, they might think it's better to let go of a good relationship while it's still sweet rather than hold on to it and watch it get distorted and destroyed in the future. It's about perspective. And yes, as someone pointed out above, it is more about what experiences you have had and how they affected you, rather than the number of years you have lived though usually, the longer you live, the more stuff you experience.
There's no reason for you to feel attacked by this specific post. I was just saying it's great to be young, optimistic and hopeful . I just wanted to point out that there is more to life that you probably haven't seen yet and there could be characters you cannot understand or empathize with. If their emotions seem too complex, you can always look for simpler manga. Over half the manga here are about high school love stories, anyway.
Having said that, I do think that over the years the maturity level of comments has gone down and become more and more about loud cheering or booing of characters based on a shallow understanding of the plot. I routinely come across comments on really good manga with good plots that go something like, "these chapters are so boring, can we get back to our ship and whether they end up together?" It hurts my eyes to see comments like "go away, bitch" written about female characters in BL just because she shows an interest in one of the MCs. Seriously? Anyway, that's neither here nor there because, yes, maturity level doesn't have anything to do with age.
Damn... When I was younger, I always told myself that I won't be preachy like the older folks around me and look at me now... I failed miserably....
The problem is that you seem pretty young as well, but trying to seem more mature than others. I know many adults who don’t behave this way. Plus, the mature action in this situation would be communicating with one another, not deciding everything on your own without a word to your partner. Yes, things like this do happen but this isn’t what an adult would do
Again - "the original post was NOT talking about maturity". Please do read before you respond.
oh, and thanks for saying I seem pretty young... it's been years since anyone said that about me.... sigh.... :'(
I won't say you're entirely wrong, but you're not entirely correct either.
Whether these people saying that are teenagers or not does not and should not matter, because everyone is different people with different experiences and mindsets. You might be older, and what you're saying might be right for you...but not everyone who gets older thinks like that.
Honestly, just being a teenager in and of itself, especially in this day and age...is honestly pretty tough.
So i do think they too have a valid enough view on things, just like older people do.
And hey, I worry about everything, all the time...I'd even say I'm very much like Sa-in myself. Which might be why I'm personally so frustrated with his actions.
But at least I'm aware of my problems and actively try to do something about it rather than run and hurt people knowingly in the process.
Sa-in's worries are valid, but his actions and his treatment of his significant other, isn't. That's what most of us have a problem with, and how valid you think that opinion is, shouldn't be influenced by our age.
Blah blah holy shitsicles! this post is getting into ppls skin. Remind me to let everyone I know never to voice their own opinion shit lmao
The comments here are proof of how young the readership of this site is. I'm not saying it's a bad thing. For people in their teens and tweens who haven't faced much pain yet, it is easy to be bold, reach for what they want without a second thought and take risks. But once life beats you down over and over again, people become cowards. That's why older people don't just jump into relationships simply based on love and the goodness of the other person. They worry about what will happen a year down the line, 2 years down the line, 10 years down the line. They worry about whether the other person might some day regret getting into this relationship because they ended up disappointing their parents, couldn't have a family or missed out on what other people their age have. People complaining that Sa-in should realize how good Sung-jae is, are not even reading it right. It's because he knows that he is scared of putting him in a position where he has to choose between Sa-in and other things that are important to him. He doesn't want Sung-jae to resent him in the future. There is a reason why the older a person is, the more conservative they are and less willing to take risks. But yeah, the younger folks don't and can't know that coz they haven't been through that yet. So, yes, feel free to call relationships you don't understand toxic (it's become kind of like a catch-all term around here) and hate on characters who aren't positive enough for your taste.