I know this isn’t the right place to say all of this, but I don’t feel comfortable posting it on something like Reddit. I just really need to let this out.
I fought with my friend last night over text. She told me she already has a boyfriend, and it honestly shocked me because they only met a few days ago. I’ve seen her go through so much before, getting played, getting hurt, and never really learning from it. And I get it, because I’ve been that person too. I’ve always been honest about my own mistakes, never trying to hide them, and I even use them as examples so the people I care about don’t end up like I did.
So when she told me about him, I didn’t try to control her or force her to break up with him. I just told her the truth, that a week is too fast, and that she should take her time and really get to know someone, especially now when it’s so hard to find something genuine. Where we’re from, courtship actually matters. It’s a sign of respect, and I just wanted her to experience something real and not rushed or forced.
She told me she felt pressured into having a boyfriend, and now that she does, she’s getting criticized for it. I didn’t agree, but I still tried to understand her. I told her she’s beautiful, that she has a big heart, and that she deserves something real, not something rushed because of pressure. I told her we don’t even know this guy, what if he’s not who he says he is, what if he hurts her, what if he does something worse like spreading her pictures. Especially since it’s long distance, there are so many things that could go wrong.
I told her she might get mad at me, but I said what I said because I care. I reminded her that she’s an adult and she can make her own choices, and I’ll still support her no matter what, whether she’s right or wrong. I told her if anything bad happens, she can always come to me, message me anytime, and I’ll be there. Even if all she wants to do is cry or just try to forget everything for a while, I’d still be there for her.
But after all that, she told me I was only saying those things because of my past. That I was bitter. That I was jealous. She even brought up how I was under my ex before, how I stayed even when he was emotionally abusive, like that’s the only reason I think this way now.
And that hurt more than I can explain.
Yes, I was stupid before when it came to love. I was blind. I let someone treat me like I was nothing, like I didn’t matter, and I still stayed. I gave everything I had, even when he kept choosing other people over me. I was insecure about how I looked, my weight, everything about myself. I felt like the only thing I had to offer was my money, like that was the only reason I was worth anything.
That part of my life was already humiliating enough. I’ve been trying so hard to move on from it, to become someone better, someone stronger. I’ve grown from that person. I don’t even recognize her anymore.
So hearing her throw that back at me, like I’m still that same girl, like I never changed, just broke something in me. It felt like all the progress I made didn’t matter, like all she could see was the weakest version of me.
I wasn’t speaking out of jealousy. I was speaking out of fear, fear that she might go through the same pain I did. I was trying to protect her in the only way I knew how.
But now I feel like maybe I should’ve just stayed quiet. Like maybe caring too much just makes people push you away. And it hurts, because all I ever wanted was for her to be safe and happy, not to be misunderstood, and definitely not to be reminded of a past I’ve been trying so hard to leave behind.
Even though she hurt me, I honestly don’t know what to do. I was never the confrontational type, and now I just feel lost and unsure of what to say or how to fix things without making it worse.
did song lyrics stuck in head
did song lyrics stuck in head
