Loeix's Topics (64)

Omg Dohun….
The flowers are a reflection of Dohun’s perception of Yuwon, and we know that he self-comforts with delusion. They kept withering bc he doesn’t know how to care for them despite being good with every other plant. So he puts up a false image of blooming.

He imagines Yuwon happy with all that he is doing and accomplishing. Basically that phantom Yuwon is still with him. He’s the one Dohun is doing all this for, this idealized high school Yuwon.

He tells himself Yuwon hasn’t changed bc he needs him to be the same. He won’t properly ask him what he needs and talk bc he doesn’t want the answer to be different from what he remembers of him.
Tells himself he’s protecting him by withholding the truth of past trauma instead of letting Yuwon process it and work through it together like they did when they were teens.
Dohun is forcing Yuwon into this mold of past Yuwon.

You said you didn’t want to see that face again, but when you did; you left again. How dare you, Dohun? Why did you leave?
Because your perception of what Yuwon’s happiness was became more important than what Yuwon’s was.

Or is it bc that’s what the Yuwon of the past had to endure, so he seemed more “unchanged” when you did it again?

But Yuwon is no longer a teenager with no power who has to wait for scraps.
He doesn’t have to submit to what you give him, and he tried to connect with you!
If it doesn’t work, Yuwon has the sense to get out.

Dohun is so attached to this idea of destiny he doesn’t know how to live without it; it’s become all-consuming and dysfunctional.
You’ve chased the goal so far you’ve lost the plot.
Mr Oh could wait another day to be killed…

…omg one last chapter bro. What’s going to happen????

NOOOOOO
MR OH. I wanted to know. I wanted to know why you felt inferior to Yuwon. Please. Please tell meeeeee
Dohun why did you cut him offffff

Dohunnnn
Why are you taking all this on yourself?! I know you want to ensure Yuwon’s happiness, but how is that supposed to happen with no input from Yuwon. Gahhhh but I understand your reasoning and circumstances;;;;

Poor Dohun, you’re really getting worn down;;; Dohun became the real happiness vending machine for everyone…

I obviously know why, and it obviously makes sense; but I really wish Dohun would confide in Yuwon.
Yuwon needs to see what you’re doing for him!!
But he didn’t tell, to keep him ignorant of the truth and protect him, so the misunderstandings piled up, where Yuwon thinks Dohun is disinterested and doesn’t care anymore and where Dohun gets blindsided bc Yuwon can’t wait like he did when he was a teen.
And it all comes out on both ends in one go. No wonder it was so dramatic…

Maybe… Dohun doesn’t really care about himself at all, and so the validation of all that he’s done and being praised isn’t something he wanted really? As long as it got done for the sake of their happy future and destiny.
He must have realized when Yuwon left that bc he didn’t confirm, Yuwon never got to believe in a future together. Yuwon was examining the now, i.e if we don’t get along now how are we ever supposed to later?

Bro he’s gonna drug his own dad…
Tbf, once you threaten Yuwon all bets are off…

Manager Jin…You can see he means well…But too little too late.
To survive in that house Dohun had to abandon his morals.
To try and sway him with that now; even though you didn’t want to take responsibility for him as a child. He might have turned out differently if you’d actually acted like a father.
But your words still nag at him bc he respects you…

Hmmm…kinda out there, but maybe Dohun wanting to be inside and melded into Yuwon stems from his mommy issues? Like being in the womb again…Dohun also wants to disappear?

Also very interesting how the spit after being choked out makes it seem like Yuwon is smiling…

:(((((((( what I thought was his heartbeat was Dohun thumping his head against the wall like his mom and Yuwon;;;;
The grainy filter also got removed, a sudden clarity.

Spoiler??
I heard that Choi Jiyoung was actually their classmate in high school, so that’s why Dohun tried to shut her up so she couldn’t spill the beans that Yuwon was actually the one being bullied…I guess we’ll see next chap.

Bro…no way this ends well. I feel like Dohun is gonna crash and burn and take Yuwon with him. TWO CHAPTERS LEFT!?!?!?! AHHHHHHH

Omg so the title is Yuwon from Dohun’s POV: Dohun’s first mistake.
Assuming that no time had passed and that Yuwon was everlasting. Oof.
Dohun is finally realizing that his conclusion was wrong all this time, and that Yuwon, whether he realized it or not, is no longer the boy he knew.
Talk about the rug being pulled from under you…
So this story is the post-apocalyptic remains of a romance that could have been.

Once again, « do you even love me » is interpreted by Dohun as « choke me to make me happy » and by Yuwon as please fucking talk to me!!!
But the doubt feels strange to Dohun bc what do you mean.
Literally all of my existence and reason for doing literally anything is because I love you.
Literally. Everything. Since high school even.
Since even before that.

…
Omg…
My baby Yuwon…
The things life has thrown at you…
Imagining him slowly waking up in the hospital, unclenching his hand and realizing the phone broke
omg
Limping back to his apartment and collapsing, then having to pay his own bills while still not being healed.
Dohun not being there to help him manage with his cast…
My poor baby;;;;

Lol Dohun visiting Hanseob in the basement being like
« I turned out fine , you’ll do great hyung! » and then IMMEDIATELY dialing up to glitchy, Obsession-worthy murderous intent.
Holy Fuck.
Hanseob.
you godforsaken bastard.
WTF DID YOU DO!?!??
There is no redemption left for you anymore.

Dohun, being a planner, was most likely keeping him alive to reinstate him eventually as heir.
Having the culprit of distorting Yuwon in his grasp, and being allowed to do whatever he wants with him…
Hanseob is only leaving that basement to be buried.

Bro Dohun is going THROUGH IT.
God it’s all so fucked up…
But it’s so delicious…
Omg it’s like a watching a trainwreck happen right in front of you.
My poor boys..I just want them to be happy and ok;;;-;

Do you know it takes me literally half an hour to read these chapters??
The author is so skilled at every dialogue bubble that I go into a mini-analysis/fanfic in my head.
Omg jakpil I bow at your feet, every chapter is SUCH a cliffhanger bro

Seongmin basically by tapping his finger on Dohun’s hand at his throat, is saying that he’s noticed Yuwon’s neck bruises.
« You don’t know how to treat someone you love. »
It’s doing double damage on Dohun bc even Dohun can tell that smth isn’t right and that he doesn’t like hurting Yuwon.
Seongmin is saying here that it’s too late; hurting him like that is a point of no return that you’ve crossed, and that the relationship is doomed.

Someone like Seongmin, who’s super aware of how emotions and feelings work is the total foil and worst enemy of Dohun.
Seongmin’s foresight is not very good tho…

During both conversations though, the main thing is they’re talking about Yuwon like he’s an object.
The objectification of Yuwon is what irks me.
If he’s not yours, he’s mine.
Like some piece of meat…

In the end, Dohun was trying to be kind though.
For Yuwon’s sake/mental health , he didn’t tell him that Seongmin legally harassed him (putting fluids in places he would touch).
But Yuwon, knowing Dohun has killed would obviously conclude that Dohun did something.
And by hiding it, unknowingly incriminates himself in Yuwon’s eyes.
What would have happened, had Yuwon seen the footage?
Maybe though painful, it would’ve showed Dohun right. I think Yuwon would’ve truly become a decorative plant at that point. He’d give up.

No, but I get it.
In the alternative of THAT face or Yuwon blaming him.
A face of being abandoned, discarded, lost and hurt.

Dohun would definitely choose for Yuwon to blame him.
But that’s why he isn’t a good match for Yuwon. Yuwon, though suffering, would most likely prefer to know than to live in silence.

« As if you were dead. »
Ahhh, another Hanseob parallel.
It worked too well…Yuwon really did think he was dead;;;

In the end Dohun won, and Seongmin conceded.
« As if there’s anything more precious than one’s own life. »
Seongmin was not willing to put his life on the line the way Dohun would (when standing up against his father).
(Not that he should have to, but that’s how Dohun judges worthiness apparently.)

In the end, Dohun’s fatal flaw is still and always communication. No communication.

The thing is Seongmin is actually the typical seme, what Dohun could have been had he been raised normally. Deceit as care, and using circumstances and emotional distress as leverage to what he wants.

Dohun lacks and craves love, he puts it as the highest ideal, so such methods are filthy and cannot be used on the one he loves.
Striving for that purity over everything , he shows love the only way he knows how: fending off threats.

Dohun protected the chestnut tree so much it has no light or water and is withering.
In a way, it’s a pure love, but it’s also blunt and violent.

The thing is, Dohun clearly understands the language, since he uses it for others.
Perhaps for him, such methods are only for the insects, which might be why he got so pissed that Seongmin was using it to appeal to Yuwon. Treating him as lesser.

Lol the leads are having a diva-off
Straight up a pissing contest. Who knows Yuwon better?
Dohun is giving Seongmin an advantage here by showing him a vulnerability and giving him information. (Props to Dohun btw for realizing and trying to accommodate Yuwon)
Now, Seongmin thinks he understands Dohun; the problem is he’s judging Dohun as a regular person.
Seongmin thinks he’s fair competition to a guy that has killed for Yuwon before.
Which…

Love the subtext in that chapter.
Seongmin is taunting Dohun by saying that it doesn’t matter if he gives up his only leverage over Dohun: « Yuwon’s happiness » bc he doesn’t think Dohun is capable of pulling it off anyway. « I felt a bit sorry for you ».

That really must’ve pushed Dohun’s buttons, since he thrives over control of the situation and just can’t stand the idea of Yuwon and him being incompatible: not meant for each other. It also made me realize just how much Dohun might have turned out normal if he’d had even one single friend outside of Yuwon.
Someone who could call out his shit.
Yuwon would’ve done it, but Dohun left him. Dohun also didn’t see others as human, which really didn’t allow anyone to give him sound advice. Director Jin might’ve, but as a subordinate can only follow orders.

And by the time Dohun came back even Yuwon was suffering in his own way. And thus, though living in the same space are occupying completely different worlds…
Dohun though feeling like he deserves being choked for what he put Yuwon through, doesn’t like choking/hurting Yuwon, even if it’s his « wish ». Why didn’t you ask him outside of sex, bro??? He would’ve given you a different answer if you pushed through his tsundereness for a bit.

Now Seongmin…it’s most likely him feeling desperate that Yuwon is slipping through his fingers and wanting to get any sort of claim on him, even if he’s acting like an animal.
Still…I’m disappointed in you, Seongmin…

Dohun most likely saw Hanseob in that camera, someone jerking off to assert dominance that doesn’t mean anything. The consolation of the powerless. And probably views Seongmin now the way he views Hanseob. A pest that needs to be dealt with out of sight.
Someone that doesn’t deserve to interact with Yuwon anymore.

As always, love the pacing, literally every chapter is a great cliffhanger lolol
Jakpil the psychological yaoi goat.
I heard it’s almost finished??? I don’t really wanna believe that…
Either way wonderful chapter!!

Sighhhhhhh, she’s doomed, isn’t she?
On the floor of all things for her first time…Matthias, you rich bastard, money can’t buy class. I hope your estate falls into ruin.

Now that Matthias has had a taste of her, he’s gonna obsess over it for a while. He’ll likely move her into the mansion…although probably after that, now that he has her, he might lose interest…These disgusting pigs don’t play with their toys long. I hope that’s the case and she gets to be free.

Poor thing. I want her to run away and take Bill with her as far as she can go.

Little occult tidbit for yall: it’s not possible for him to have summoned Baphomet bc he doesn’t appear in the Lesser Key of Solomon at all! He appears in later works, i.e the Grimoire should be called High Magic or it’s straight up another demon.
Also, dunno if it’s on purpose but the duke’s name is Dezzo Lutin; Dissolution. Baphomet is the epitome of the joining of opposites; the destruction to rebuild/earn knowledge (solve and coagula: dissolve and reform, which you can see on his arms if you look up a picture), which is most likely why he knew all about Dezzo’s past.

Honestly, the plot is kinda jumping around and they’re really counting on a lot of suspension of disbelief; there is NO realism here lol (why tf would you give a guy who’s family betrayed you his home territory back!?? Wouldn’t you confiscate his assets to have financial control over him??? No one cares the king is dating a maid!? They call him a duke but the townspeople legit just throw stuff when they think he is Lutin, but he’s a murderer who could have them executed????? No friction whatsoever from being a normie transmigrator into a duke….Whatever.)
Thank god the toxic dynamic between the Crown Prince and Dezzo is pretty nice. It’s giving me Black Butler flashbacks « queen’s guard dog ». The dumbass actually did use dark magic though. He literally signed his own death warrant at the start of the story…omg whatever
I’ll just keep reading and stop judging lololol

Okay~ So another piece of the puzzle has been exposed. We already knew that Dohun saw his mother in Yuwon (the same apartment, the head-banging, the longing, the miserable expression of guilt, that feeling of being worn-down and at the end of their rope).

His mom mistreated him under her care; probably because he looked like his father.
As he mentioned, she would use him as an outlet to forget her suffering (the subtext points to SA, which omg poor Dohun;;;;;), and then it would morph into rage and she would strangle him/blame him for her circumstances.
It also makes sense why he would say that he would take on Yuwon’s suffering as kids (bc that’s not a childish thing to say): he was already a scapegoat for his mother.
The hanging outlet on the fan/light?? catches my attention though…Was Dohun really taken away/sold from his mother? Or did she hang herself and they had no choice but to take him in?

In a sense, the drugs made Dohun honest for the first time: he actually told Yuwon what was going on (though he wasn’t listening) + Yuwon uncovered a part of him he’s repressed since childhood.
Also, now it looks like Dohun sabotaged Yuwon’s work bc his father was threatening him, so he kept him home in order to make sure nothing happened to him? I’ll have to confirm.

But although he says he wanted to uncover the TRUE Yuwon, he still projected his solution onto him, for what he thinks is Yuwon’s sake. (Strangling him as a method of stress relief) So this must have been the catalyst for their violent sex; Dohun must have felt that it worked.
At least it seemed cathartic for Dohun…he’s been super stressed for such a while.

I wonder if he indulged later? Was he high when he carved their names?

Now this makes me wonder…if she is still alive; even though she was a wretched woman, wouldn’t he want to find her? Especially with the power he now currently has…I wonder if he’s asked Jin for that…What would he do if he did? Make sure she’s happy and leave her alone? He’s clearly still attached and hasn’t processed her mistreatment…

Also lol the ironic turnaround for Hanseob. I mean yeah technically he is out of trouble. No wonder he called him so miserably. Guy must be going insane with withdrawal…


Gosh, this story…everything makes so much sense it’s crazy…What kind of genius is the author and manhwa artist??? It’s so delicious and peak;;;;
If they ever make anything else I’ll jump on that like Dohun jumps on Yuwon;;;;

Now what could Dohun have possibly asked from Director Jin? Something he’s done before…
Burying the evidence of a murder?
Hmm maybe related to continuing the family line; impregnating a woman and passing it off as Dohun’s son? But Dohun talks so well, what a charmer.

We also do not know what Dohun had planned for Hanseob before the name-carving(that’s what I’m calling it from now on) happened.
He didn’t seem agressive at all, on the phone in the car back then, so I figure it was more of a ´the guy will cause his own death through drugs anyway’ let time do its thing type of approach.

But it really was luck that allowed Dohun and Yuwon to meet again!!!! I thought the father had given him a reward.
Dohun has a right to call it destiny. This loverboy has gone all in on Yuwon. I’d guessed because he killed for him, and he’s literally told us this whole time. Yuwon is his DESTINY. No wonder he didn’t want to let him go, he’d prefer to die than for that to happen. A recipe for an extremely unhealthy and codependent relationship~
Now what was up with those texts he sent Yuwon about coming home early?