Kope's Favorite

i rarely write reviews this detailed but I am so utterly shaken by this one that I cannot help but try to convey the bitter taste it left in my mouth. i finished it with an uncomfortable nausea and a grief that still coils in my stomach.

both Mamiya and Sada are proof that tenderness can survive even when it is intimately acquainted with the grotesque. they remain painfully human though their actions no longer resemble humanity, and because of that, i understood them in places where i could not necessarily relate. there is something almost unbearable about loving another person beyond the usefulness of language.

wanting to give another person everything the body can surrender, only to discover that even being consumed would not satisfy the desire to keep them here. however, their relationship itself was remarkably restrained and i think that was due to them largely being at peace with what they could not give.

that was the grief i carried away from this story. even with Mamiya’s ending, it suggests that a person may live perfectly well without intimacy when they have never depended upon it, but once they have known the relief of being understood, returning to solitude is not a return at all. the absence of being known can become more unbearable than the solitude that came before it.

i also favor the authors refusal to reward love merely because it was genuine. reality does not become generous when people finally find one another. perhaps that is why the story affected me so deeply. it offered no comforting lie about love conquering everything. instead, it suggested that love may conquer nothing at all and still become the most consequential thing that ever happens to us.

“stop calling me a rapist or i might become one” ??? LMFAOOOOO what

Started out decent but gradually ran downhill which disappointed me. :(
It was a semi-solid story, but it lacked depth and intrigue between the characters, resulting in shallow understanding of them and little-to-no-care about their fates.
The author’s intention of making the characters actors was what broke my immersion. And if that was actually a relevant decision, then I would agree that reading this story felt like a drama. It lacked
inner monologue and depth to fully understand everyone’s motivations. For example, Kangjin was just a huge idiot who couldn’t decide who to love, or rather, he always went back and forth confusing the reader why he would suddenly switch. From staying with one dude, saying he loved him, to then promising another they should run away together. In my eyes, he was just an indecisive cheater who would bend his ass on a whim.
Despite Jungkwon having many reasons for the reader to care for him—debt and such—he was nothing but a shallow-written character. I had sympathized with him being financially tortured, but even then, there was nothing in store. In a few scenes, his words seemed to suddenly cure the other’s depression effortlessly, which was so rushed. Take Roah for example. What… impact did he have on the story except for being a meaningless character? He could’ve been removed from the story and it still wouldn’t leave a stain on the major plot.
One thing that rips the characters apart from truly making you care is that they all lacked direction—inconsistencies in their writing that often emerge, accompanied by lack of understanding their motivations.
Chisoo was a cold-hearted mafia boss, unpredictable and had always kept everyone on their tippy toes. Then he becomes some… conflicted corporate guy with a soft heart? I get it, but the transition with his personality felt so jarring and honestly way too rushed. He felt like a totally different person. He was made to be some mysterious evil guy, then the story suddenly expands more on the context around the organization that pretty should’ve been revealed earlier than later.
Interactions between the characters felt so little, and the time the characters had spent together was so short, there was barely any connection to understand them on a deeper level.
All in all, the climax and resolution was lackluster, making the ending meh. Since this is the author’s first work, these issue are fairly common.
Unfortunately, my original post had to be re-written (accidently reloaded) so there may be some things I had missed while writing. Other than that, decent read.

Time of irritation, 1:44am. Don’t start with ts tonight.

"is sir mugo a bit of a pervert" no tribulation doth mine eye perceive

yo dead mother is ashamed of u hoar. instead of avenging ure here wanking a mentally deranged man who is in the first place the cause of all this shinenigans. u should be ashamed u faggot

im so irritated the bottom gonna be the dark haired FREAK. ughh. why can’t we ever get a snooty buff blond bottom that gets chased first why we always gotta have some fucking loser ass BITCH

I think this might be the most natural way I’ve ever seen two characters get together in BL manga. There’s no ‘aha’ moment or exaggerated moments of blushing. They just somehow realized it in their heads and accepted it with very mature calmness. It’s so beautifully written and meaningful without having to use any dramatic plot devices. They just slowly fell in love, simple and nice.

jingi is definitely compensating for his trauma. some lasting psychological effects of csa are hyper sexuality and self destructive behavior. the fact he's modified his genitals could be a sign of both.
he's more affected than he lets on, whether he knows it or not. for example, him rebelling against his abuser by growing his hair out long, to make himself undesirable. his need to dominate and to hurt others through sex, it all leads back to his abuse.


hyeonjae was stunted, not just developmentally but emotionally. that's not to say he 'doesn't know' what he's doing, but his emotions feel juvenile, very one dimensional. his anger and jealousy are magnified ten times over childish reasons. it's all or nothing for him. that could be because he grew up as an outsider, both in his foster home and school. but this chapter also shows he was exhibiting signs of cruelty very early on. which might be psychopathy instead? who knows

Can anyone recommend me more yaoi like this please - dark and phycological and with gorgeous MC and ML? (Those two are genuine so hot together)

Under the green light, flashlight, king's maker and shutline are my other favourites for reference.

May I have a crum of pee

Somehow it feels like the comments complaining about the age gap either have not fully read it or don't have any media literacy.
The story addresses the age gap.
Yes, it weird. No, it's not problematic. The first season was about that answer.
None of you are beating the allegations of being sparky 14 year olds on tiktok thinking they're morally correct for holding self indulging fiction to a moral standard.

This dudes life is horrible omg just kys

Came back for my weekly hating rant until the ml SUFFERS FOR BEING A DENSE ASS, PATHETIC ASS, MANIPULATING FUCKING IMBECILE. ACTUALLY SOMEONE BRING HIS DEAD ASS MOM BACK TO LIFE, CALL UP HIS ABUSIVE ASS DAD AND LET ME IN THERE TO JUMP HIM. AND THROW THAT HOT CHEETO HAIRED BITCH IN THERE TOO, LET ME BEAT THE RED 40 OUT OF THAT BITCH TILL HE'S FUCKING BLUE
UGGGH THIS IS SO DOGSHIT I HATE ITIHATEITIHATEITIHATEITIHATEITIHATEITIHATEIT

KILL THAT FAGGATRON GJORD UR TWINK NEEDS U OMG

Newest chapter min hoyeon gets killed slowly amd painfully by a disease and no one gives a fuck

i didn’t know i ordered a peakeroni pizza