This is making find a side of myself I didn't know I had.... (⊙…⊙ )
YESSSS YESSS AHHHHH YESSSSS. YESSSS SIDE STORIES YESSS I MISSED THEM SOOO MUCHHHHH AHHHHHHHHH(っ˘╭╮˘)っ(っ˘╭╮˘)っ(っ˘╭╮˘)っ
LONG TEXT!!!
I don't how to feel about this, I have found feelings about this and I'm confused how to feel and I'm feeling wyq too much things about this. This is... IDK HOW TO FEEL LOL???? Like, they're both freaks, but ml is extremely sadist, but I think he kinda wants to know how to love or how properly show affection/ aka a gentler side of himself? Due to the part he asks himself if there's a gentle side for a beast like him, so I understand he, in the bottom of his inner self, wants to understand how to love or how to be gentle? I mean, his parents were no great example, it seems he hasn't had another partners besides sexual/bdsm partners, and never really had a figure to teach him how to be gentle/loved, just agressive and unhealthy. Not justifying, just trying to look deeply onto this because it's the first maneja where both love protagonists are extremely unhealthy and toxic. The Mc is extremely perverted, unhealthy about habits, obsessive, and just like ml he doesn't really understand what love is or how is it composed/made, he understands he "loves" G.O, but at the same does it also in an unhealthy way, expecting his partner to be something he isn't and putting them both in a difficult situation, and G.O is nothing better, acting like his father the second he feels jealous or not enough for Minwoo. NOT JUSTIFYING, this is very dark and hard to swallow most of the time, just I'm trying to analyze both characters; cause even someone like Minwoo could be capable of doing something to G.O if he was like he fantasized him to be; aka sa when G.O could be asleep or recording them in private situations, stalkers really can be extreme, so what I'm saying is that BOTH characters are toxic and unhealthy, and until they don't really heal themselves first, over trauma or understanding the other, BECAUSE ITS OBVIOUS G.O LOVES MINWOO TOO but he's too internalized, unhealthy and his toxic upbringing never really taught him how to be, and it seems he's rather the no social type, then it really affected how he feels around Minwoo, to the point he could kill him by his jealousy, or insecurity, because for some reason I smell insecurity coming from him? It's like he needs to feel like he's the one and only for his partner, and if they do something he perceives as his partner seeing something better/aka people who could give Minwoo better "love" or his body reacting to another males, it's an automated reaction of not being that good that even with another body Minwoo reacts, although it's a physical reaction, not a mental matter, and the fact that happened JUST after Minwoo said that he loved him... Yeah, G.O also loved him is obvious. I think it's very unhealthy and toxic, not usually what I enjoy, BUT I hope the author really knows how to handle this and doesn't end that corny, because sorry but they both fit each other quite a lot, negatively yes, but they both lack understanding of human beings, so maybe they'll learn from each other. I agree that it could end like this too, lol ╮(￣▽￣)╭
Idk how the author went from something so wholesome and great to this shit, deadass. BUT, the story and suspense are sooooo gooooood I'm really hoping to see more.
Not saying the whole story is ass, but comparing it to dangerous convenience store... Ngnhb.... I don't know... ┑(￣Д ￣)┍
right lmao, got me fooled bcs the author wrote dcs
Idk I could tell something was up from the get go. The man is super strong, lacks intelligence, can't remember his childhood, screams like science experiment and raised in a lab or something. I also felt like the uke going for the seme that hard, like disregarding his feelings like that, felt abnormal to me (it wasn't in the usual hot and heavy yaoi way but like he couldn't understand why he was so attracted to him). I think he was spot on that he was confusing his fear with love, that's something that happens with trauma. I forgot the word for it but it's similar to stockholm syndrome. It was giving heavy "this story is going to be nothing but PTSD and trauma" vibes from the get go for me. It only started out "fluffy" because of the uke's amnesia and confusing his trauma response for love. Crazy concept to fall in love with the man who murdered your family and almost killed you, but I'm here for it as well lmao.
Did some Googling because I wanted to remember again, apparently it's just quite plainly "misattribution of arousal" and is a common trauma response, happens commonly with those with PTSD (they may find someone safe to be "boring" because they do not feel constantly anxious around them, for example), but there have also been studies done showing increased arousal (and misattribution of) from someone in an enviornment that causes stress, fear, anxiety (while some participants may have history of trauma, likely not all did). The first initial study which was repeated twice and yielded the same positive results (misatrribution of arousal encountered with participants of both) simply had men walking across a long suspension bridge. Super interesting stuff.
Honestly I thought this one would be great; don't get me wrong! I like it, but their relationship is so FAR away from dcs, and although it started fluffy, since the environment and ambiance is so different from the one in dcs; although that one was also quite bad... I understand it's going to be darker, but I didn't think the author would go this dark (but as I said, I enjoy it since it's okay but putting side to side to dcs honestly is so different lol). What I meant was that the author changed themes/tropes real fast and I'm looking forward to see more and hope we get more answers and they can be happy, to not, depends on what happens and what ml and Mc do. ╮(￣▽￣)╭
Bruh I'll leave this to marinate until the end of the year atp
I give it 2 chapters of peace before the angst, I just feel it my children DO NOT BE DECEIVED BY THIS GENEROUS, BEAUTIFUL SMUT
Ssshhh let us revel in this peace and prosperity
Shall my paranoia soon infect you my child (〜￣△￣)〜
DO NOT BE DECEIVED MY CHILDREN, THIS IS JUST THE START OF THE WAR (ANGST). I UST KNOW AFTER THIS EVERYTHING IS GOING TO GO DOWNHILL, I JUST KNOW IT, IM NOT CRAZY NO NOT THE WHITE ROOM AGAIN NOOOOO AHHHH NOOO I'M THE VOICE OF TRUTH NOOO ( ≧Д≦)(〒﹏〒)༼;´༎ ༎༽
This manwha be collecting kinks like medals (⊙…⊙ )