This shit is so good. Usually the puppy type of tops are kinda bland, but this one is just so funny. And actually cute. He actually looks young, cute, ridiculous, borderline stalker is cherry on top. This is what I mean when I want a younger puppy top x dominant bottom.
I absolutely love the back and forth picture sending, the little banters and communication of jealousy, the facial expressions is top notch, the fucking handcuffs, top dressing up shyly for bottom, etc.
I do think the top is weird but in a funny way, it’s ridiculous how he likes someone so easily if given the attention…and I love how his back story explains why he is that way. It makes sense.
But he does need some hurt to grow.
Not that I want him to stop being loud and cute.
I just don’t like the sunbae, I don’t want him to be the main source of pain. I better not see him catch sunbae and MC kiss. And I dearly hope the MC beats the shit out of Sunbae. That guy is really infuriating, usually I would love toxic male lead (1st or 2nd idc), and he looks good, but somehow our cute top is more appealing to me. Look at my smut (taboo) list, you couldn't think I love cute tops.
Besides that, I wonder if the brother of top would get with the sunbae.
But not until the sunbae fixed his trashy behavior.
Kang Hyo-in has been in love with his best friend of eight years, Jin Ye-geon. After years of pining...
- Author: Lee hyun
- Genres: Webtoons / Yaoi / Adult / Mature / Smut / Drama
The gray haired guy is so my type when it comes to yandere-like personalities, lord. But he is shitty of course based on some comments and I don’t condone that. What has he done so far?
1. What did gray hair do to MC? Rape? I see hickeys on inner thigh etc.
2. What is gray haired to MC and vice versa? Debt?
3. How angst is this compared to aurhor’s other works?
4. How many chapters until completion? If known
If anyone wants smut chapters (I didn’t add all), it’s in my smut list.
Totally not promoting. I update it whenever I come across good/taboo smut.
Don’t get me wrong, I hate Reo for what he did but I love his character.
He’s a dumb ass rapist. If he hadn’t done all that, I would be in love with him. He is handsome and cute. But terrifying. I wonder if there’s any characters exactly like him? Terrifying (rape aside) but cute? It can be in novels. I think one of the scariest scenes was when Reo had Kuzuya stuffed in futon and raped him…even if it was brushed off as comedy, it felt suffocating and gross. Harada San is really good at making us feel it.
Yeah the rape is not taken seriously, it’s a comedy, Harada san is amazing at it. I love the acknowledgment of rape and pedophilia though. The biggest victim of Reo, Kuzuya/ “Zenko”, was like: I could’ve wished for him to be soft after one or two rounds of sex .
In the latest volume Kasuya is chill about the sexual assault from his coworker, even urging him to continue. I wonder how long it’ll take for Kasuya and Kuzuya to fall for each other? Or maybe they’ll continue to seek others while being together noncommittal?
YES PLEASE FUCK HIS HOLE ( consensually )
IM STILL MAD AT THE ML FOR THINKING OF HIS FIRST LOVE WHILE FUCKING MC. GROSS.
This feels lackluster.
I wish they had discussed more about the ‘loving all of them differently’.
Shinjoo said he loves Youngjoo, but he liked Youngjoo’s brother. That makes sense, and I liked that Shinjoo got to explain how that kind of face is his type.
But then he said he loves everyone differently, referring to the one he proposed, the one he was attracted to, etc? Differently as in he wants to fuck them all and show love differently or it’s not exactly love, platonic?
Help. And the monogamy feels kind of forced, cause all those scenes implied he wanted poly but I could be wrong. But I love these two together, I wouldn’t want others involved.
Everyone is a hoe in the comment I think I’m gonna stay loyal to fictional man THEE ML.
I tried to be one cause the Jaesok guy looks good (well not even good enough to surpass ML imo), he’s annoying as shit and probably raped the bottom in their past lives. I just hate how haughty he acts and touches the MC, PENIS GET YOUR HANDS OFF.
Oh, I was expecting it to be just the manager/blonde haired guy and Muyeol, but now the brother of Chani showed up? Hmm, it might be a threesome / poly, I am begging. MUYEOL TAKING TWO DICKS LIKE THE SLUT HE IS. GOD, PLEASE GIVE MUYEOL A VAGINA TOO.
What the hell is happening at the end of ch 4?
Is Uke being dragged away or forced?
And why is he being forced to work in that place?
Yes, please bring back the Yandere obsessive partners that kill.
Not the ones that just glare and control a bit
Someone please explain why they had a fall out in the past.
I read and I’m slow, maybe tired, but also lazy. If you have time, please help a snail out.
Future me, is this a peak story where the asshole is the bottom and gets railed like crazy? Even better if making love.
Note: This was just supposed to be sexual scenes list cause I’m a horn dog, but it ended up being longer as I saw it’s more deeper than some comments reduced it to as just smut/‘cheating’/slutty MC and he wasn’t even that slutty. More like a hurt person lost in the moment, and most of the time it was assault by spirit. I can’t agree that MC mainly thinks with his ass or dick when plenty of scenes showed otherwise. You can find it icky that he slept with Seorim, but not the assaults, it wasn’t sex let alone consented. There are way less smut scenes than I expected. Even the ‘sex’ scenes with others were short, none of it seems fetishized. I don’t believe it has great plot or execution, but it’s not ‘just porn’. It’s lackluster sometimes, but tolerable. I hate the lack of sexual assault consequences or discussions. Don’t expect to find clear answers here, these are meant to be my thoughts on almost all chapters. Feel free to comment theories, and other things. I am curious and confused too. I go from disliking Gidam to accepting.
TW: Ugly ghosts, sexual assault/rape
GIDAM: blonde hair, 2 beauty marks | bottom. Annoying, but held grief and guilt.
NEULHAM: tan skin, black hair | top. What can I say? Sacrifices
YOHAN: Gidam’s past love and trauma
SEORIM: ‘emo’/grunge, lip ring | root
BEOMYONG: shaman, lashes | savior
SUNHWA: ‘mother’ of Seorim
MIRO: green eyes, snake bite pierce
ROOMMATE: glasses, lost and cute
Ch 14: Yohan possesses Seorim, and assaults Gidam. Did Yohan continue to possess Seorim after this or has Seorim been possessed all along?
CH 16-18: Gidam consensually initiated sex with Neulham. ‘I didn’t know I could cum like that’ - Gidam (splurt up type I think)
CH 21: Special Idiot Moment: Gidam goes back to Seorim, to summon spirits despite getting raped.
CH 22: Lee Haseong (lip scar) killed Yohan(?) in past. Anyways, short scenes of Yohan possessing Seorim, and sex with Gidam. Gidam said it’s okay because Yohan was his first love, lust filled, guilt. Then ghost left and Seorim is back, but Seorim goes for another round of sex. Not sure if it’s from possession effects, but Seorim felt the desire to. Says Gidam could use his body whenever he wants? Anyways, Gidam let him and admitted to not minding it at all. Since then, he had multiple sex with Seorim (after classes, after club, on off school days). Seorim wore regular clothes in one, and another time he wore Yohan’s bloodied uniform (ghost Yohan fucking too?)
Gidam hadn’t replied to Neulham for six days. Takes different classes so it was hard to run into him (THEN FIND HIM?? And not go fucking after classes), thinks about how sex chemistry was perfect with Neulham. Then says that if Neulham wants to see him, Neulham would reach out. Bruh
CH 23: Gidam lied to Neulham that he took off the beaded bracelet to shower. (He took it off cause Seorim told him to for ritual days ago) Gidam pouts and wonders if Neulham has anything else to say besides that, and how it hurts his pride. Neulham hugged him and asked why Gidam didn’t reach out. Gidam says he could ask the same. Neulham thought Gidam wouldn’t like it if he reached out first. Then Gidam, in his mind, makes a jab at Neulham for being a virgin . I do appreciate the down-bad-and-horny comments from the bottom/Gidam: “You’re making me so horny”. It’s nice to see that instead of “No…” types.
CH 25: Ugh, I really dislike that Gidam is messing around (even if he lets Yohan do it out of guilt + remorse) with Seorim + ghost. And not telling Neulham. He also still didn’t wear the bracelet despite being reminded. Ugh, Seorim is so shady, he also tongue kissed that frightened girl/Miro, manipulation final boss. I think it’s Seorim mixed with Yohan’s spirit. Oh yup, Yohan. He said: “Don’t forget, you slept with this body (referring to Seorim’s body), not with him (Seorim himself).”
Huh? So does Yohan not know Gidam slept with Seorim? Anyways, Yohan says this after and I’m confused: “If not, let’s kill him, kill him (repeat)—and accept US.”
Us? Kill Seorim? What? Or did he mean: Kill Neulham, and accept Seorim + Yohan (us)? Someone explain.
CH 26: Oh. Yohan wants to kill Neulham for some reason (feeling Neulham’s presence). Gidam stops him and begs, saying he will comfort him in exchange if he stops. Yohan says he won’t kill if he can put on a ‘show’ (sex) for Neulham to walk in and see. Yohan assaults Gidam who is passed out after. Neulham sees and confronts. Yohan shows his past self (Yohan’s own body!!) and Neulham recognizes him OMG. Yohan: “You’re the one who made me like this.” ????
CH 27: Gidam has a nightmare or something, he is being held back by bunch of hands (ghost probably), but it’s not Yohan? So just ghosts in general? Yohan is standing across from him, says to come to him, and reaches out. But ghost pulls Gidam back, saying not to take Gidam away. Gidam slowly wakes up as he is apologizing for leaving Yohan alone, feeling like he abandoned him. Neulham asks him to promise to keep bracelet on from now on, and Gidam agreed. Gidam still decides not to tell Neulham about the situation with Seorim + Yohan. OOOH: Gidam wonders if he was pulled away from the nightmare and woke up because Neulham placed the bracelet on him, or because Yohan ‘saved’ him in his dream.
It makes more sense that Neulham helped. Also I doubt Yohan ghost is the real Yohan, just a ghost. So it’s plausible that real Yohan’s spirit could have helped too(?), considering how the hands and ghost figure yelled at him to not take Gidam away.
Then again, Gidam could have just seen Yohan’s figure as his savior in the nightmare, blinding himself from the idea that Yohan could turn against him. Perhaps the ghost is really Yohan.
The old man passed away. Hm. I wonder if he was killed by the vengeful spirit of Yohan/ghost/Seorim?
CH 28: “Either you or Gidam, one of you is going to hell with me!” — Yohan to Neulham. Huh? Why would Yohan go to hell unless he was a bad person?
1. Neulham wonders how Seorim’s body was taken over by Yohan?
Meanwhile, Gidam had a dream of Yohan. They had sex together in there, and he says Yohan has always been gentle and kind. Hmm, so it makes no sense for ‘Ghost Yohan’ to want to drag Gidam to hell. Gidam said it has been a long time since he dreamt of Yohan.
Suddenly Gidam’s roommate asks if Gidam was cold last night cause Gidam was apparently saying he’s cold. Anyways, Seorim hasn’t been to school in two weeks since that incident. Roommate said Seorim invited him so they could talk.
Gidam said if he was really worried he would have seen Seorim, but he also doesn’t want to after what happened. He admits that he fooled with Seorim before, because he got caught up in old feelings (towards Yohan). Now Gidam feels like the existence of Yohan doesn’t make sense. He decided to go see Seorim, just to make sure things are okay.
CH 29: Wtf, someone in bathroom stall asked if Gidam could pass toilet paper but I think it was just a ghost. Neulham came in time and said that was just the janitor’s closet. I’m so glad Neulham and other friends ragged along to see Seorim. Upon arriving, Gidam took note:
a. Seorim is eating too much than usual
b. Seorim’s pictures on wall are gone
c. Seorim’s glare and “You do like me, right?”
Neulham noticed and made an excuse, dragging Gidam with him as well. They went to Neulham’s place, WHEWW.
CH 30: Gidam wants to act dense. Neulham yelled at him to stop lying, and that he knows it’s not Seorim anymore. Neulham begs for him to stop and leave the club, to live in the moment. Gidam, in his mind, says he is confused and not sure what to do, that Yohan suffering as a ghost is real too because the Yohan who held him gently is real too.
Neulham says he can satisfy and give Gidam what he wants. He asks Gidam if it’s so important to see someone who’s long dead, and what then once meeting him? Send him off to heaven once tired of him?
Gidam tells him to not talk carelessly (not careless btw). Ooh, Neulham shouldn’t be forcing a handjob right now though. Gidam says: “Since this happened because of me, I will finish it. Don’t pretend it’s for my sake and pressure me with your feelings. Idk what you thought I was to you, did you think I’d give in cause you held and begged me? You have no idea how i’ve felt about that all this time. Naive idiot” (idk probably cause you didn’t say anything, YOU ARE THE NAIVE TFFF HOHO).
Next panel Gidam is thinking: Neulham is right. He admits to not wanting to let go of Yohan, then says missing someone isn’t a sin. Nobody said it was. But missing someone and holding on isn’t the same, naive ass. Seorim invited him back, Gidam thinks: [I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of you, but sending you where you belong—is right thing to do.]
Gidam plans to end it since he started it.
CH 31: “Care to say something, honey?” - Yohan (lord that was kinda…). Anyways, Yohan pushes for sex and Gidam lets it while explaining how he’s happy with him and all, and that he would help send him to heaven. Yohan gaslights.
Finally, Gidam’s backstory. Yikes, Haseong guy (green hair, lip scar) was adult (20+) by the time Haseong was 18 years old, begging Haseong to delete pictures. Haseong had kept taking advantage of Gidam from start of Gidam’s high school year. Gidam tried to get away but couldn’t, and had no support system. Apaprently Gidam used to be sweet and affectionate with Haseong, and Haseong feels like he was abandoned, hence why he blackmailed with pictures. Thankfully Yohan came and beat Haseong up, got him to delete pictures. Gidam feels guilty for dragging Yohan into it. Oh wow, backstory Yohan would’ve been my favorite if not for this ghost situation. ‘Bad guy but nice to one he likes’ type.
CH 32: Gidam met Yohan during his 1st year of high school (16). They both turned 17. Yohan was actually nice to everyone and treated them same, just a bit of rough talk. Aww both were in same training-for-idol-group, then Gidam confessed to Yohan. A year later, they were in the final lineup to debut. This is when the Haseong blackmailing happened, but Yohan got it taken care of. But…Yohan was summoned to police station. Their manager was furious, and Gidam stepped in for Yohan. Manager said: “you’re involved too? You’re supposed to be the shy quiet one!!” Bruh what? Idol persona? Omg.
It was Haseong’s doing. He used his connections to involve media and all, ruining their debut. Now I get why Gidam felt guilt. Gidam was bullied as well, his desk with cruel words and dick in ass drawing, ugh. His own father shamed him, said Haseong was doing the right thing. Then this is where Haseong splashing water on Gidam scene re-appears, he had fabricated a photo that made it seem like Gidam and Yohan were fucking (assuming).
Gidam apologises to Yohan, and Yohan said it wasn’t his fault, that everything was a big slap-in-face/joke. Before their graduation, Yohan killed himself in winter. Now I see why he was so vengeful. It confirms the ghost is him. He is no longer human. It makes sense the things he did, even if cruel.
CH 33: Back to present. Gidam begs for Yohan to end things with him, to move on, leave innocents out of it. Gidam said he will stop (ig), but he wants to take down Neulham first. Gidam wonders:
2. Why is Yohan after Neulham? Why drag Neulham down to hell? Why does he deserve to die?
Aw. Gidam wished he met Yohan’s fate instead of Yohan. Survivor’s guilt. Miro went to a shaman and got a pouch for good luck I guess? Miro likes Seorim. Neulham went to visit Yeo Bomyung.
Gidam had another dream of Yohan, sex a bit and talking. Gidam wishes they could stay like that and how he won’t make Yohan feel lonely. He asks if Yohan heard him, Yohan: “Well I can’t say anything because you…”
Gidam wakes up, surprised.
3. What did Yohan say?
Summertime arrived, Gidam and friends went on a nice vacation together. Neulham didn’t come.
CH 34: Lol, Neulham left him on read, that feels good. Gidam remembers what he said to Neulham, and felt guilty. Seorim joins him in the balcony, tells him to lighten up. Gidam realized: did Yohan ever give Seorim his body back?
4.I wonder if the Seorim who seemingly got control of his body (back in the ritual scene) was Yohan all along?
Miro joined (girl who likes Seorim) and asks if Seorim (Yohan) wants a smoke? Poor Miro, she got rejected. They both notice how different Seorim has been, especially the roommate of Gidam, the glasses guy. That Seorim has been different since they visited Seorim at hospital. That Seorim has been treating Gidam like he’s his friend.
Night rolled around, everyone is asleep, Seorim is lying next to Gidam and decided to rape sleeping Gidam. Ooh, while doing that, real Seorim tries to take back control of body and Yohan tells him to stop, to not mess up his plan, and that Seorim gets to enjoy all this because of his doing (referring to sex I guess). Gross!
OMG NEULHAM CAME NEXT MORNING.
CH 35: They all go to the beach. Gidam casually asks Yohan why he isn’t swimming. Yohan says it’s because his stomach is aching. Gidam is nervous because Neulham is back, probably feeling scared cause of what Yohan might do to Neulham. Gidam and Neulham go to a more secluded area. Gidam asks Neulham why his texts and calls were ignored for weeks.
AHHHAA! Neulham did a hard counterattack of pettiness: “If I remember right, this is how it’s always been between us.”
But he does apologize for pressuring Gidam, and acknowledging that he never tried to understand Gidam’s feelings about the situation, etc. He said he was sincere about wanting Gidam to be safe, then turned to leave. Gidam said he isn’t going anywhere, said that Neulham left out one more thing he wanted to hear. Told Neulham to stop running away.
Meanwhile, Miro approached Seorim (Yohan), and asked to talk. Shit.
CH 36: Whew, finally, the two talk. Neulham and Gidam. Gidam admits to not being trustworthy, the lies and all. He tells Neulham about the past. Neulham says he knows what happened to Yohan, OMG. So he knew all along, wow, ouch. Back to Miro and Seorim, the two are talking and Miro asks if Seorim has someone else he likes? Seorim (Yohan) asks: what do you think? While sticking his tongue out. LOL.
Miro has that same pouch in hand from before. The one she got from the shaman lady, I guess it’s for warding off ghosts.
CH 37: Gidam and Neulham are having sex while having a deep conversation. Gidam isn’t sure if Neulham is doing this because he wants to, or just cause Gidam wants to. Neulham asks how he should look at Gidam? Meanwhile Gidam is secretly raising a knife at Neulham OMG. God this idiot.
Back to Miro. The pouch is a talisman given by the shaman, to clear away any strange spiritual energy. Have it on for 15 days, then give it to target in-person. Oh, so Miro has been suspecting for weeks. Miro yelled at Seorim to stop walking away, then hands him the pouch, affecting him. Seorim is bleeding and Miro is scared. But thankfully some Saint-like being came, the Yeo Bomyeong. I guess this is why Neulham met up with Yeo. Yohan is mad cause his plan ruined.
Gidam is suddenly affected and passed out, causing him to drop the knife. I guess this was Yohan’s plan, for Gidam to kill Neulham. He held Gidam in his arms while hand prints appeared on windows, bunch of ghosts looking at them, including the same ghost from Gidam’s nightmare, calling for Gidam. It looks like ‘Ghost Yohan’ stopped possessing Seorim and moved elsewhere, towards main couple.
CH 38: Gidam is bleeding a bit, he is possessed by that ghost. ‘Ghost Yohan’ appears, taking over Gidam and raises the knife to complete his plan. Okay so that was the plan, manipulating Gidam and get Gidam to kill. The ghost said it’s the day both Neulham and Gidam goes down. TBH, it makes no sense for Yohan to be this mad at Gidam, who did literally nothing to him. The past is him involving himself.
Yohan tries to kill again, but Gidam does his best to take over, stopping it. The ghost left his body, angered and disrupted. lol, Gidam’s roommate walked in and was so lost. He was frightened when Neulham told him to lock doors. Neulham talked to himself, that he wasn’t a murderer. Neulham thinks of Yeo Bomyeong, everyone’s only hope to get out of this situation.
Then, Yeo Bomyeong knocks on the door, to open up. That it’s him. HMMM, YEAH RIGHT. Who do you take me for? Gidam?
CH 39: Oh shit, it’s really Bomyeong LOL. You can’t blame me for being suspicious. Everyone is together, passed-out Seorim too. Bomyeong is a third year student taking leave. He explains that Seorim’s ghost gate had been opened forcibly, somehow it had been made easy to possess Seorim. He asks everyone if Seorim/anyone got close to an elderly man with strong spiritual energy?
Miro remembers the elderly man at the retirement home they all went to. Oh shit! Roommate and Miro explained that Seorim had been close to an elderly man there. The elderly man who said he could see ghosts. Then Seorim gave a talisman to help the man ‘think more clearly’. Then, right after, Gidam had passed out. Bomyeong said it might not have been a talisman, but something sinister. SHIVER ME TIMBERS!
Bomyeong guessed it might be an offering made using Gidam’s hair or blood.
“designed to attract evil spirits and command them to bring about his ruin”.
SPIRIT-SUMMONING RITUAL. The one Seorim and Gidam did in early chapters.
“A ritual that uses a doll or similar effigy filled with rice, blood, and hair to call forth a spirit. In this case, Gidam was used as the effigy.”
Neulham kicked at passed-out Seorim, to wake up and fix it. Seorim (well, ghost) awoke and taunted a bit like: “If he wanted to see the dead (Gidam wanting to see Yohan), why not see it through them through a ghost’s eye?”
Neulham yelled at him, that it was dangerous and that he threw Gidam over to the ghosts. Seorim (ghost) said everything after was Gidam’s own doing. He said Gidam trusted him more than Neulham, taunting a bit. Bomyeong told Neulham to not let the THING fool him.
Bomyeong: “That fool is lying through ITS teeth because ITS plan is unraveling. That thing spent years preparing Gidam to be a sacrificial offering.” (Oh so this isn’t Seorim at all, nor Yohan? It never was?)
Continuation of Bomyeong: “But then some worthless stray spirit showed up out of nowhere and ruined the entire plan.”
He tells ‘Seorim’ to tell the truth.
5. Who’s the ‘worthless stray spirit’?
Seorim (ghost) didn’t speak, Bomyeong did for him: “Only reason it forced open Gidam’s ghost gate, it planned to take over Gidam’s body and put his mother’s spirit in him. That’s why that thing manipulated Gidam into falling right into its plan.”
WOW.
CH 40: Huh, but then narration saying: ‘Seorim told us everything’ got me confused. So, that was Seorim talking just now? Not a ghost? Anyways, backstory: remember the shaman lady at the temple (ch 8 I believe)? She marched up to Seorim because Seorim was disturbing ‘her’, his mother’s resting area I assume. When Seorim failed to bring back his deceased mother’s spirit, he resorted to more dangerous methods. Along the way, Seorim noticed Gidam. “She (shaman lady) told me not to disturb my mother’s peace, but never said I couldn’t have someone else do it.”
Okay, so Seorim was already fucked up before everything. Seorim dropped some of his blood into a cup, and gave it to Gidam who drank it. Gidam: “Why does it taste like metal?” Yikes, poor Gidam. Also Seorim chose Gidam because:
“Both were haunted by the loss of someone they loved dearly, and willing to do anything to see them again.”
So everything that happened, Seorim was pretty aware of. “Because Gidam had already been exposed to *his friend*’s spiritual presence (showing Yohan’s old uniform), getting Gidam to open his ghost gate to another spirit was easy.” (Panel of Gidam being fucked doggy style)
Ohh, so that’s why Yohan appeared to be separate from the ghost in Gidam’s nightmare. Seorim was the one fucking Gidam after that ritual scene, not Yohan. It was never Yohan, was it? He would never blame Gidam, go figure but I figure go.
IN SHORT (lie): Unable to summon his deceased mother’s spirit in Gidam, ‘this thing’ chose to use Gidam as a pawn to do its dirty work. But then THE STRAY SPIRIT/YOHAN got to Gidam before it/Seorim could. Neulham was about to punch him, but Bomyeong stopped him:
“There’s a reason I called Seorim ‘IT’.”
OK. So not Seorim! (Remember ghost left his body) Bomyeong said that of all spirits attached to Gidam, Yohan holds the most malice (not towards Gidam I think). Bomyeong and Neulham plan to unravel a tangled thread, to transfer the spirits into a vessel, because that’s what is making it easy for Yohan to stay.
CH 41: No time for a full ritual to complete that plan, so Bomyeong will ward off other spirits for now. Neulham said he would take care of the spirits attached to the deepest part of Gidam. Bomyeong said he’d chant outside while Neulham takes the spirits in him. And Neulham has to keep it in until sunrise.
Gidam apologized for what he tried to do (knife). Neulham knows he was being manipulated, since Seorim/evil spirit lied to Gidam about how Neulham was a murderer of Yohan (using Gidam’s love for Yohan as a tool). Still, Gidam felt guilty, saying he should have been there for Yohan before he killed himself. Aw, Neulham said he would stay right there with him, give his life’s TIME.
CH 42: The two are having sex, for ritual of course, and talk as well. Back to Seorim, his backstory: He had been abandoned before, growing up without a father and his mom left him when he was a kid. A woman who was his mom’s acquaintance arrived, taking him in—Sunhwa, the shaman/old lady’s daughter or ally I assume. There is suggestion of a romantic history between Seorim’s mom and Sunhwa. Aw. Sunhwa is so beautiful and kind, filling a void in Seorim. Back then, Seorim wanted someone to love him no matter what, he wished for that.
Sunhwa died. Seorim regrets not wishing for her to stay alive and well for a long time. People who did jobs like Sunhwa’s job often passed away without warning. Due to risks of ghosts and other malicious spirits they deal with. Seorim self harmed a lot, praying that someone could love him, his step-mother, Sunhwa. That love is something he can still have.
Back to present time. OH shit, he lunged at Bomyeong and strangled, not wanting his plan to be stopped.
CH 43: Ugh, why didn’t anyone tie up Seorim? He is a danger to all! “If even that wretched Gidam could be loved and cherished by *his friend* (Yohan), there’s no reason I should be denied the love I crave!”
Bomyeong pities him, and caresses his face. Haha, what are we doing here. Reverse psychology lol. I’m not going to ship them, shitface Seorim literally caused this all. “Face the truth, boy…your mother is never coming back, she won’t love a monster you made of yourself.” — LMAOO.
“She was never your mother, she was your legal guardian. The only reason she took you in was out of compassion for your biological mother. She stayed with you because she thought it was the closest she could be with your biological mother.”
TAKE THAT!
“Listen to me, my poor child..” (child? Aren’t they same aged or similar? Whatever ROFL) Anyways, everything Bomyeong told Seorim is so mature, so healing, so real, so beautiful, so full of love. I won’t quite everything, so please read this chapter! It’s wonderful what Bomyeong says about loving and letting go.
Sunhwa’s spirit shows up and gives him closure. Meanwhile, Gidam and Neulham are still fucking (for ritual of course) haha. Gidam is in a dream, he meets Yohan who tells him“it’s all over”.
CH 44: Gidam realised something inside him faded after ritual with Neulham. A part of him disappeared (shows panel of Gidam holding onto Yohan) and all left was an overwhelming sense of emptiness. I assume this means he is letting go of Yohan, the spirits that fed on his memories and love of/for Yohan is gone too, which helps a ton in letting go. ‘The moment he realized what he lost, there was no turning back’ what does that mean?
Is he referring to the LOSS of Yohan? Literally and figuratively. And he can’t turn back time, it is what it is. Then, Gidam finally realized where the warmth holding him had truly come from—Neulham. Remember when Gidam was questioning himself if what saved him in his nightmare was Neulham’s help or Yohan? It was Neulham all along. Maybe a bit of Yohan too, but nothing amounts to Neulham’s support for him.
Gidam asked where Neulham was, next panel shows Neulham going back home. Gidam’s narration: “in the end, I lost everything I cherished.”
OMG?? FR? Not that it’s worthy to get excited over. So, all of their vacation is over and returned home. With Seorim, he decided to follow Yeo Beomyong (Shaman Yeo). Hum.
Back on topic. Neulham vanished, and nobody would tell Gidam what happened. Both Seorim and Neulham took a leave of absence from school, though Seorim was easy to find. He was with Shaman Yeo.
I need to stop overthinking, Yeo and Seorim probably won’t even be in that kind of relationship. My heart is racing, literally, out of excitement. And imagine it’s just friendship, I’m gonna sob out of disappointment I don’t want to admit.
Anyways, Seorim was still staying with Yeo Bomyeong, undergoing a spiritual cleansing. (Okay ig, just a cleansing.)
Bomyeong asks Seorim if he could sit next to him, no refusal. The two are sitting together. Time passed a bit, Gidam graduated and worked a desk job at youth shelter. ‘QUEEN NEVERY CRY’ reference in here haha. Gidam found a hobby of live streaming, telling scary stories.
4 years have passed. Gidam had let go of Yohan completely, visiting just to mourn and leave good offerings. He still thinks of Neulham, wondering where he disappeared to. On the 3rd year of the 4 years that passed. After Gidam paid his annual visit to Yohan’s grave, he received a package for Neulham.
CH 45: The package was addressed to Neulham. Gidam is desperate to find him, so he goes searching. He comes across an old classmate who helped.
It looks like Bomyeong is the one who did that. He used a friend’s name to ship something to Gidam’s address. OMG Seorim is still there with him. Notice how instead of Beomyong asking to sit with him, it’s Seorim sitting next to him now. Can’t get too happy, remember what he did?
Moving forward, Beomyong pressured Neulham to stop hiding and face Gidam. That he doesn’t have to hide anything anymore (probably because of the spirits he took in). Gidam finally managed to meet him, disguising as a delivery man. OMG Neulham was living just 5 minutes from Gidam’s place.
AND CAUGHT UP.
I don’t mind if ghost bottom and top end up together, they’re the focus and I enjoy it. However, I hope the ghost finds his own identity somehow. While I’m a sucker for reincarnation or transmigration tropes, I can’t with this, especially knowing how the other guy loved top a lot. It doesn’t feel good in my opinion.
Raws Link: https://funbe667.com/%EB%82%A8%EA%B3%A0_%EC%86%8C%EB%85%84_117%ED%99%94.html
This new guy is a penis. Boo hoo he got picked on and beaten BY OTHER GUYS WHO INITIATED IT MIND YOU. And he decided to mess with Iltak’s life/relationship. (Unless iltak initiated it, I don’t remember) Not that I really care about how Iltak was an accomplice, I would continue caring if the new guy didn’t become such a penis with smelly tofu balls.
To those who act like Iltak hasn’t tried to apologize or talk:
Remember when Iltak tried to apologize and talk with him about the past? Who was the one that dismissed the past and the talk in general? The new guy. Evil fag has gone too far.
•He mentioned a plan or idea to rape Iltak with other guys
•He sexually assaulted Iltak several times and ruining the relationship with Hyunwoo.
•He stole Iltak’s first kiss if I am correct, no consent. He has the audacity to tell Hyunwoo that Iltak didn’t resist.
This penis can go hike off a Cliff, he deserves to get beaten to near death or locked away to rot. Matter fact I hope he finds someone else to love and they cheat him. You know what else? Hyunwoo making out with Iltak in front of him as he sits in the piss corner.
Also, I wonder where orange head is? I forgot, did he transfer or something because where is he in this mess? I wished he was there to help Iltak. He is still in the cover, with Hyunwoo, Iltak, and the new guy. Don’t tell me he and new guy will somehow be a couple?
Poor Hyunwoo, tried to beat that ugly rat and Iltak’s annoying ass (but understandable) got in the way. Then Hyunwoo got thrown out by the rat.
The lack of authorities, the lack of adults/teachers, the lack of support outside of Hyunwoo is just plain disgusting. Iltak really is a Y/N in poverty. Poor writing, and it’s clear as a sunny day but I never fail to get surprised. I still read because it’s not the worst I’ve seen, and I came this far, might as well finish.
In the raws, I can’t tell but the new guy seems remorseful but I wonder what he said in the bolded dark text bubble at end? It doesn’t seem like he plans on being good anytime soon. There was a male student on top of Iltak, possibly trying to assault sexually, but new guy stopped it—ah ah not gonna make me like him.
I’m glad to see Hyunwoo and Iltak make up, and I applaud the nasty look Hyunwoo gave Iltak lol (for defending new guy). But no victim blaming here! And hoping the two evade new guy’s mess.
Someone said this and I agree! I’m fuming they haven’t gotten to this, discuss the childhood friend stuff. It grossed me out how the top was thinking of the childhood first love(?) while fucking MC, fucked two women, this greedy bastard. Yeah, let the MC have a taste of emperor cock, even better if they end up together.
“ Overall, the seme wasn't fully in love with the uke, and I hate it. The fact that he reminiscences of his childhood crush while having sex with the uke is a big NO for me. Once the revelation will be reveale that the childhood crush is alive, it would collaps the relationship they built. Will the seme be swayed by the childhood crush or will he remain firm on his relationship with the uke? We will know that on the future chapters. BYEEEE”