chiki's Things

so i got into yaoi when i was about 10 years old it was something i could get sucked into it and forget about reality for a few hours you know and i didn't have someone to talk to? A few year later i told my cousin because he the closest person i can relate to in my family and he gave me a look of utter disgust so i felt ashamed from reading yaoi? i moved on form that and i told my closet friends they said OK and we'll keep it a secret it they always torment me about it saying you read about sex and guys getting pregnant and sex and dicks they looked in my dairy and found manga's of yaoi stories and said it out loud in the class luckily nobody heard them and i felt betrayed at that moment and ashamed because they kept bullying me about it and i don't know why i keep hanging around them in school maybe because i'll be alone in school and i'n not the most popular one n school so i usually don't go out of the house to go out it'd been 4 months already and they treat me like a 4th wheel and i'm afraid that if i tell my friend that i treat her like a sister she'll be disgusted of me. i really don't want to lose anymore friends anymore. did anyone ever feel like that before. it's just that i really relate to yaoi