I think these feelings are all valid. People feel the same, even I have felt like this at one point. I think the first step is to be conscious about it and acknowledge it, which is what you're already doing! You're making great progress :) The next thing is to figure out strategies to help become more confident in yourself, and feel ok without need...... reply
I have an ungodly amount of ships TT. I often tell my friends lol, but it's fine because they either simp with me, or on other characters. My latest obsession: Nie Li.
I am also obsessed with a number of other ones, Kakashi, Aizawa, Aomine, Ushijima, Kageyama and so many more TT
And you know, normal guys might shit on me saying 'wow, you like 2D...... reply