Amnesia

Have you ever lost a memory? I lost my memory 3 years ago and until now I can't regain all of my memory. Sadly more,I can't remember when was the first time I met my Gf and when did I start fall for her. I also can't remember my first kiss with her. Because of this,I lost lot of closer friend's. I was a cosplayer and cosplay photographer,many thing like cosplay and everything also I can't remember. Until now I was still feeling down,I don't have that courage to speak out. What should I do..