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Internalized homophobia sucks.
This is very hard for me to admit but I have internalized homophobia. I'm a cis gay man and it has always been hard to accept my sexuality but after five years of misery, I finally came in terms with it. I love myself but there are times I think "What if I am actually a sinner?" "I should be with a woman not with a man, this is wrong" "Pedophilia is a mental disorder but so was homosexuality. Am I in the wrong here?". It is so scary, am I a bad person? I just want to love. What if I'm living my life wrong? Is marrying a woman and having kids the right way to live? I'm so sorry for this rant but I cant think of anywhere else to post this. I have seen a lot of queer people in here and I would like your pov.
Tl;dr - Is being gay actually okay or is it just a mental disorder?
I can understand where you are coming from but I never thought internalized homophobia was a thing, to be honest. I question my sexuality when I found myself attracted to one of the girls in my class. She was mysterious to me and I was curious about her and with time I wanted to get to know her, be friends with her and somehow protect her cause she...... reply
