Almost 25 yo virgin

I am embarrassed but also not embarrassed but also can’t tell anyone about it but also don’t want to overhype s*x or expect it to be great the first time but also don’t what to meet weird people obsessed with purity culture but want to find someone who understands how important to me it is but also want to be in love with someone when I do it but also am insecure about my body but also am scared to start dating bc I don’t want men to think a certain way about me if I choose to tell them I’m a virgin and also don’t want to be perceived:/