Is this healthy for me?

I have been re reading a fanfic every 2 months after the first time I read it and cried like a child who got its first beating. And I read it every time knowing that my favourite WILL die. I just reached chp 7 and everytime we get a thought scene i remember that he is going to die at the end and then cry again.

My brother told me to stop reading it but it has became more of a tradition for me than a fun little fanfic reread.

(It's a satosugu fanfic btw)