Here
Thought I'd post my reply to a comment since quite a few of you seem to need to read this :
The first thing we need to understand is that gender and sex are two different things.
Sex is the biological body we were assigned at birth, usually marked by whether we have XX chromosomes ( considered ‘women’ ) or XY chromosomes ( considered ‘men’ ).
Gender is a different matter altogether.
Gender is something we, as a society, have coined to act as a marker for how people should act, behave, dress, look, etc.
Examples:
Men should be fierce
Men shouldn’t cry
Men shouldn’t wear dresses
Men shouldn’t wear makeup
Men should provide for families
Women should speak politely
Women should be ‘feminine’
Women shouldn’t like blue
Women should dress modestly
Women should have families and give birth
Gender is what dictates what is considered ‘masculine’ and what is considered ‘feminine’.
We humans are the ones who decided what should be assigned to each ‘gender’ and are also the ones who, hypocritically, don’t accept other genders.
What is considered socially acceptable for someone's gender also differs across cultures, people, religions, etc.
People are the ones who decide what makes someone a woman and what makes someone a man.
Gender isn’t even something we are born aware of; it’s a learned trait.
You don’t wake up as a baby one day and decide that pink is your favorite color, or that you're not allowed to cry because you were born with a penis.
That is something people explain and teach you from a young age; it is a learned trait. Not an instinctual or biological one.
This invalidates your statement on gender entirely.
Since we now understand why gender is a construct made by people, we also understand that gender is not what you want dictating bathroom usage; it’s a person's sex.
Secondly, the people you are intimate with are not entitled to know what sex you were born as.
Why?
1. It’s private information, putting everything else aside. What is in your pants isn’t relevant to anyone, at any time, unless you go to the doctor and they need to check you for medical reasons.
2. Transphobia is utterly rampant; people every day are violently murdered and killed in cold blood because of transgender hate crimes. They get beaten, raped, assaulted, abused, etc. every single day. Why? Because people are so stuck on the fleeting idea of gender that they’d rather someone be dead than alive and next to them.
Transphobia is everywhere. In a world where telling someone that your gender is different from what someone assigned you when you were born can lead to your death, it’s common sense not to tell everyone and their mother about how you feel, even your partners, whether sexual or romantic.
3. Straight means into the opposite GENDER, not sex. You can be straight and like trans women; it doesn’t make you gay, and it doesn’t mean someone is any less of a gender because they have a penis. Being straight means you like women. If you are strictly into cis women ( also known as having XX chromosomes ), that is something you should make your partner and other people aware of before getting with someone. Because at the end of the day, saying you only like cis women isn’t going to get you hurt, but a trans woman can get hate-crimed simply for having a dick in her pants.
Third, your take on “testosterone or hormones” is completely illogical. Only a small minority of people even have access to gender-affirming hormones or puberty blockers, and it is widely considered strict or illegal for most people under the age of 18. Do you think they hand them out like free Halloween candy or something? Anyone who gets them legally goes through a doctor and multiple steps to have a chance of taking anything. Plus, most things taken to stop adolescent puberty are reversible. Very few things are life-altering, and I promise you these people know what they want and need before they take them. Being transgender isn’t a phase; it’s a real-life circumstance that people everywhere go through.
Fourth, your comment about someone's frontal lobe not being developed enough to know what they're doing. This comment in itself completely dismisses the intellect and life experiences of queer youth.
Because of all the shit queer youth have to go through at a young age from idiotic bigots, they’re more prone to growing up faster and maturing earlier than their peers. Plus, a person's intelligence isn’t determined by their age. I know more than enough idiots who are already nearing retirement age, or even ones who are in their 30s and 40s. I promise you, someone's age and how developed their frontal lobe is does not dictate whether they want to be a women or a man.
Fifth, you say you're specifically coming at Lilly Tino, yet you seem to have used plural nouns, meaning you’re not just referring to one person; you’re referring to everyone in the community. If you say things that are widely used as hate speech and cause hate crimes around the entire world, put it in a post to try to explain your ‘reasoning’ on why trans people shouldn’t do something; you are going to be seen as a MAGA Trump supporter, especially when you're sharing the same ideologies as them.
Sixth, and last reason: this is mangago, dear, a queer space for queer people; it’s unthinkable to write something so clearly transphobic and then wonder why people on one of the biggest yaoi ( man-on-man, a.k.a. LGBTQ+ ) pirated platforms are dragging you for something clearly bigoted and not thought through.
Queer people are going to get mad whenever someone brings something like this up in real life; someone gets hate-crimed. You cannot blame a group of people for getting mad and frustrated when this is the first step to them getting their entire existence denied by people who haven’t even done proper research on said subject, especially not in their own safe space. Of course they’re going to be mad; you just denied their entire life, right in front of them, in their own homes.
I hope this helps. Please read up on some actual books about transgender people and not just parrot what you’ve heard from other people's mouths.
