Willow's Things

I have tea to spill because I'm pissed off and all my friends are asleep (it's the crack of dawn here) and I need to unload. Y'all can either spill some more tea or say whatever idk.
It's gonna be long, ngl.

So I've been part of this friend group for the past 6 or 7 years. It started online during COVID and then we grew closer in real life. But I left the group because they wouldn't stop hating on me. But I've kept a few of my friendships that actually mattered, the rest are just some misogynistic bullies who are triggered by an opinionated woman. Anyway, we were gossiping with one of the girlies and she was saying how this other girl whom I've never been really close to is talking shit about her and making up stuff about her. And I was like, I was at my sister's place the other day and she suddenly said she's close by, then she came and had a drink with me and said BLUH BLUH BLUH about you to me too. And my girlie said "you know she's been hating on you since day one, right? everyone knows." And I said I had no idea. (I fact checked and it was true btw. She had a whole group chat dedicated to me)
Anyway, fast forward to yesterday, my friend exposed a lot of things about her in her personal channel. I didn't say anything, just quoted the part that was about me in my own channel and said "I was never close to this person. But to all of my friends who've known about this, thanks for the heads up. I welcomed this woman into my home without knowing she talks shit about me."
And THEN one of my closest friends suddenly came to me and trashed me outta nowhere and said that I'm a cyber bully and that my feminism is selective and a lot of other mean things to me. And I was like, girl go talk to the person who exposed her. I can't tell a whole ass woman not to say certain things in her own private channel. But she wouldn't listen, and she was like "I shouldn't have backed you up when the other guys were shitting on you." And she was angry that "I didn't fight for her when she had a nasty breakup with this other guy from the same community." First of all, I cut contact with the guy after the thing with her. Second, I didn't FIGHT for this other girl either. And third, she never confronted the guy publicly for me to back her up. Uggghhh I can go on and on but my thumb hurts so that's enough for now. If you've read this far, thank you and I love you so much MWAAAH <3

It's pride month, so give your fellow queers a piece of advice or experience that you think they can use on their journey. I'll go first:

Give yourself permission to explore who you are without assuming you already know the answer.
Sometimes we end up defining ourselves by what we're trying to escape.
You might discover that some things you pushed away weren't the problem at all, the pressure surrounding them was.

Ladies, theys and gays... I need your unbiased opinion. Let me explain:
So person 1 (female and a family member of mine) and person 2 (male) have been married for 10+ years. Everything was great until year 5 of their marriage that 1 found out 2 was cheating on her with multiple random women. She wanted to get a divorce, but 2 begged her not to, and the rest of our family except me weren't supporting her so she decided to give him another chance. But 2 was cold and refused intimacy and was being super annoying in general for the next 5+ years. Last year after so much push and pull, 2 finally said he hates "women's kind" and she's wasting her time with him. Mind you, she's a very independent and strong woman, she's never relied on him financially or anything. So she said alright and their divorce is in progress, but she seems kinda conflicted because she never got the closure she needed.

Fast forward to today, another family member of mine saw one of 2's friends (drunk af) and the dude started spilling tea about how 2 is gay and he only married 1 because he was scared that his very conservative father would cut him off. Apparently, all of his friends told him that he shouldn't ruin a good woman like 1's life but he said that his father wouldn't get off his back if he doesn't marry. And five years ago, after his father died, he realized that he's got nothing to lose and accepted his sexuality. (I assume that the sleeping around with women phase was just his denial era)
Anyway, that family member told my mom about everything, and my mom was about to tell 1 but I stopped her. I said 1 would be more comfortable hearing it from me since we're closer.

Sorry for yapping so much ╥﹏╥
Anyway, here's the main issue:
A part of me knows that 2 is a horrible person who KNOWINGLY wasted 10+ years of 1's life and made her feel lonely and humiliated; and that 1 deserves to know why she's been treated that way and get closure. But another part of me is conflicted about letting a fellow gay person be outed like this. I temporarily stopped them from saying anything, but idk what's the more ethical thing to do.
What would you do if you were me?

Spill random tea for me, I'm bored.

I was kinda upset, and I started baking. But I fucked up and ended up with cookies that look perfect but taste like soap; now I'm even more upset.
Tell me about your fuck ups so I'd feel less stupid WAAAAH